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General Chat This forum is for discussing anything that doesn't fit into another forum, or for discussing things that are off topic, or just for general venting.

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  #1  
Old 02-18-2019, 02:23 AM
kate331 kate331 is offline
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Default Thoughts and Prayers

I need your thoughts, prayers, good vides etc as S(4) is in intense care sedated at our local childrenís hospital after a freak sledding accident. He has multiple fractures to his face, jaw and body and will needs intensive surgeries in the upcoming months. Tomorrow they will insert a feeding tube

Thankfully there is no brain damage although there is some swelling in the brain, also some hearing damage, but it still too early to determine how much. We are facing a long road ahead of us for his recovery, but it isnít life threatening.

Keep your children safe and I urge all parents to have your children wear helmets even when sledding!!! And heed warnings of icy conditions. This particular park had been closed to sledding, but children still continued to do so.

Iím trying so hard not to blame the ex for his lack of judgement but itís really hard right now. Iím racked with guilt seeing my baby hooked up to all the machines, and not being there in his time of need because I wanted my ďme timeĒ and my ďrespite timeĒ. If I could turn back the cloak I would in a heartbeat.

The hospital here offers a bed beside their child, he looks so peaceful sleeping and Iím on here venting . I donít think I will be able to sleep at all tonight.

So thanks for the long vent!!! I donít know if I want to barf or faint right now but thanks for listening cause itís gotten me though some the evening.

If Iím not making much sense I think itís because Iím still in shock over his condition.
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  #2  
Old 02-18-2019, 04:03 AM
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Tayken Tayken is offline
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[QUOTE=kate331;233872]I need your thoughts, prayers, good vides etc as S(4) is in intense care sedated at our local childrenís hospital after a freak sledding accident./quote]

Done.

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Originally Posted by kate331 View Post
Iím trying so hard not to blame the ex for his lack of judgement but itís really hard right now.
Unfortunately, it won't solve the problem that you both currently face. I highly recommend you talk to the social worker that is assigned to your matter. They are very helpful and will guide you through everything and even help with your anxiety. Don't shy away from them. Many parents don't realize that they have access to them.

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Iím racked with guilt seeing my baby hooked up to all the machines, and not being there in his time of need because I wanted my ďme timeĒ and my ďrespite timeĒ. If I could turn back the cloak I would in a heartbeat.
This isn't your fault. It really isn't the other parent's fault. It is a freak accident as you stated. Again, talk to the social worker about how you are feeling. Everyone in the family needs to heal when things like this happen. These feelings of guilt and anxiety can and will create obstacles for you when you have to make medical decisions for your child. The social worker is there to help everyone in the family.

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The hospital here offers a bed beside their child, he looks so peaceful sleeping and Iím on here venting . I donít think I will be able to sleep at all tonight.
You probably won't be but, one of the things you will need to do is sleep and eat. The next 48 hours is going to be horrible. I can't even imagine what you are going through but, please do not forget to take care of yourself too.

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Originally Posted by kate331 View Post
So thanks for the long vent!!! I donít know if I want to barf or faint right now but thanks for listening cause itís gotten me though some the evening.
I would recommend barfing over fainting. If you are feeling ill at all don't hesitate to call a nurse. The last thing you want is to faint and become a medical emergency too. Please sit down and don't hesitate to call for a nurse if your own condition changes.

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Originally Posted by kate331 View Post
If Iím not making much sense I think itís because Iím still in shock over his condition.
You are probably in shock. They have services to assist you at the hospital. Utilize them. The healthier you are the better you can help your family through this.
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  #3  
Old 02-18-2019, 09:29 AM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Every good thought and prayer for you guys. And I second everything Tayken is saying.


I can only hope youíre at SickKids- they are the best childrenís hospital in the world.




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  #4  
Old 02-18-2019, 09:36 AM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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it was a freak accident.

I will share a story about my almost bad sledding accident. We were there with my parents and my aunt, uncle and cousins. We were having a great time. It was a huge hill so my Dad used his snowmobile to pull us back up the hill all the time.

Well the one time we hit some ice or something because we got some speed going. Being kids we didnt notice the barb wire fence we were heading straight for. My mom was freaking out, my dad felt helpless as he told my mom even on the snowmobile he would never catch us as we were way to far away. We ended up hitting a small rock and tipped over. My cousins, my brother and I never knew how close we were to a bad accident. We just thought it was a blast that we went so much further then before. If not for the rock it would have been worse.

Freak accidents happen that is why they are called accidents and not "on purposes". Your sons accident could of happened on an open hill. Your ex probably saw the other kids doing it and it seemed fine. Its no ones fault.

Your child is alive and though recovery may be a while, he could of been much worse. Dont focus on blame or guilt. There is no reason for either of those emotions. Just focus on your son. I bet the father is feeling guilty as hell and is waiting for you to ream him out. Maybe a kind word to him saying that it wasnt his fault is in order here.
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Old 02-18-2019, 09:46 AM
PeacefulMoments PeacefulMoments is offline
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Wishing your little one a speedy recovery and you the strength you need. And also to add in that it is truly an accident, try not to dwell on what ifs. Hugs.
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Old 02-18-2019, 09:55 AM
Mom 2 Two Mom 2 Two is offline
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Healing thoughts to your little one. Stay strong Momma... you are strong and I know deep down you know your ex is feeling just as horrible as you... take care of yourself. Take it minute by minute if you need to. And vent all you need to. Sometimes just venting and talking helps for sure. Hugs.


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Old 02-18-2019, 07:20 PM
denbigh denbigh is offline
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That sis terrible! It must be terrifying! As others have said vent away! I hope things are going better today
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  #8  
Old 02-19-2019, 01:27 AM
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arabian arabian is offline
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you got it (my prayers and positive thoughts)

Look after yourself ... sleep whenever and wherever you can.

No sense whatsoever in blaming each other. Focus on supporting each other through this horrifying time. In the days/weeks to come you and your ex may find it logical to be at hospital in shifts. Working through this will be one of the biggest challenges of your life.

Tayken has excellent advice about accessing resource people there. They will know what you need and will surely be able to help you sort through feelings as well as practical matters.

Make a list of personal items and have a friend go by your place and pick things up (if you are not planning to leave hospital). Hospitals are filthy places so be sure to have someone bring your own towels.... sorry but I'm pretty fussy about those things. Making list will help you feel in control of something - anything... I'm sure you must feel totally overwhelmed and very, very helpless.

You can vent with us all you want.

God bless you and your family.
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Old 02-19-2019, 11:08 AM
Asphenaz Asphenaz is offline
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[QUOTE=kate331;233872]I need your thoughts, prayers, good vides etc as S(4) is in intense care sedated at our local childrenís hospital after a freak sledding accident./quote]

You got it!
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  #10  
Old 02-19-2019, 12:23 PM
Stillbreathing Stillbreathing is offline
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Thoughts and prayers are with you. Try to focus on the positive. Your child is still alive, in good hands and recovering. Try to stay focused on the here and now. Emotional pain is associated with time travel. Looking back at what was or could have been or looking forward and imagining the worst. Try to stay in the present and focus on the fact your child is strong and is still here with you.
God bless.
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