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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #41  
Old 11-20-2020, 09:31 PM
goblue goblue is offline
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So far the only thing I've agreed to is my daughter moving part time to Sudbury as long as my access isn't affected and she continues to go to daycare in Massey. It was through a letter from her lawyer stating that she was accepting another job and through social media that I learned today was her last day of work. Nothing else has been communicated to me.
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  #42  
Old 11-20-2020, 09:59 PM
goblue goblue is offline
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Question. What happens at first court appearance? This is under ocj. My lawyer said it's basically getting date for case conference. Can anything else happen here?
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  #43  
Old 11-20-2020, 10:06 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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No its just to set the first case conference. You may want to ask your lawyer if they can ask for an urgent date to speed up having it heard but that may be a crapshoot.


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  #44  
Old 11-20-2020, 10:20 PM
goblue goblue is offline
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Ok thank you.
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  #45  
Old 11-21-2020, 07:59 PM
goblue goblue is offline
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Co-parenting advice needed: How many times in a day am I required to answer the ex on how our daughter is doing when she's with me? lol it's 2-3 times per day. It's easy enough to reply "good" but it's getting more and more aggravating.
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  #46  
Old 11-21-2020, 08:12 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Stop responding. Tell her once up front that you are busy with child when with you and you will not be answering any texts or calls. If there is an emergency you will let her know otherwise you are going to enjoy your parenting time.


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  #47  
Old 11-21-2020, 08:21 PM
tilt tilt is offline
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Easy, I take up to 24 hours to respond. Train your co-parent to have the same expectation. Just because they sent a text doesn’t mean I have my phone on me or am obligated to respond right away. So, I would do a slow fade. First text, maybe take a couple of hours to respond and then preface your reply with “hey, sorry, I was busy being with our daughter, we are both good, see you Tuesday”. Next text 6 hours till your respond. And then just stretch out the responses till 24 hours after her sending a text seems normal. At that point I would use Rockscans script.

If Rockscan’s response sounds like it would work for you right away, do that. I just find sometimes laying down a hard line in the sand, especially after someone has been trained by my own behaviour to have certain expectations, can escalate things unnecessarily.

Also, I strongly doubt you are, but if you are texting her excessively on her parenting time, stop.
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  #48  
Old 12-04-2020, 09:24 AM
goblue goblue is offline
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First case conference is set for Jan 4.

Received text this morning from ex saying that she's been staying in North Bay and that this is where she will be keeping our daughter during her time with her (and that this is why she asked to change schedules to week to week).

Asking my lawyer but I don't know what recourse if any i have. SO much travel for my daughter, and it's worse if I don't agree to schedule change.
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  #49  
Old 12-09-2020, 09:32 PM
tilt tilt is offline
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I would NOT agree to a week on/week off. That will definately open the door for her to push for full custody, attending school in North Bay. Would her Massey daycare even keep her space open if she only attended biweekly? Keep the current schedule and maintain that your daughter's residence is in Massey, NOT North Bay. You can counter-offer that your daughter lives with you full time with EOW with her mother in North Bay.
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  #50  
Old 12-10-2020, 02:12 PM
goblue goblue is offline
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Thanks Tilt, I'm doing exactly what you've said. That, and denying her request for a schedule change for Christmas. Our agreement beginning last year was to switch on Christmas Day so our daughter can spend time with both parents. She's trying to change this to her keeping her that day so that our daughter doesn't have to travel, but it's apparent that travelling means from north bay. It's getting ugly with blame being pointed at me for forcing extra travel due to denying both requests. Ummm I'm not the one that moved without an agreement or court order!

Anyways, our last discussion on the matter was basically her saying she's enforcing week to week and since christmas is on her week she's just going to keep her. I think this was mostly a hissy fit and won't do this (although I've been very wrong about her before), but a letter from my lawyer is incoming threatening an urgent motion on the matter.
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