Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Post Secondary Money and Relationships

Collapse
This topic is closed.
X
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Post Secondary Money and Relationships

    My two oldest children are going off to university this weekend. I am very proud.

    But...

    They have teamed up with their mother in a, "You have to pay for our schooling whether we talk to you or not." position. They have incredibly entitled ideas about what I should have to do and very little interest in working through some bad blood between us.

    More than anyhing, I want to be able to talk to them. My daughter gave up on me when she was 15 during my second marriage-now separated. She blamed my wife, my step-daughter and me and has never forgiven me for bringing this person/these people into our lives. My son gave up on me when I disagreed with how much money was being asked of me during his first year of school.

    My ex and I disagree on how much is reasonable to contribute to our kid's schooling after their own reasonable contributions.

    I have always disagreed with the amount of child support I was paying as we shared the kids 50/50, especially once we were both married and their joint income was always more than ours.

    I just wish that I could be treated by the law, the same way a father in an intact family is treated. He has a definite say in how he will support his children during post secondary education. Me? I am trapped by an agreement which was prescribed by our laws.

    If my children won't even speak to me, how is it possible that they can come and demand that I support their educations, with their mother and the courts standing behind them?

    If this goes to court and I am forced to pay, then I hope that they, too, will be forced into counselling with me in order to help our very strained relationships.

    People say that you can't force people to do what you want. True. But, they can force me...

    I have offered very close to the amount stipulated in our agreement, a percentage by income, but minus the child support I was paying - they don't live there during school. They need to get a student line of credit with me at my bank as I have no savings and can onlly get this type of loan right now. My children have expressed concern that I will not keep this agreement and take full responsibility for it. I have promised a legal letter stating that I will. Time is running out

    I have been following a plan of leaving them alone and hoping that they will come to me at some time. Is there anything else I can do?

    My ex has repeatedly threatened to take me to court and I have finally said, "Go for it!".

    What else can I do? They will bankrupt me if I am forced to pay what they want. Why is this not my choice?
Our Divorce Forums
Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
Working...
X