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Does cheating/adultery affect Spousal Support?

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  • Does cheating/adultery affect Spousal Support?

    Hey everyone,

    Speaking strictly on spousal support and not on child support or any other issue. If one spouse committed adultery, and the couple ended the marriage as a result, would the other party have to pay spousal support?

    Let's say that the non-cheater makes good dough and the philanderer does not.

    What I'm getting at does the law currently take into consideration the conduct (adultery) of a spouse in awarding/not awarding spousal support?

    I'm not in this position merely curious. I would hate to be the guy who works hard all day to keep his wife home only to have her run off with the pool boy then have to pay her wads of cash each month.

    If the law currently does not take conduct into consideration in awarding or not awarding spousal support, do you think it should??

    My vote is yes it should.

  • #2
    The only time adultery is relevant is if you seek an immediate divorce (before 1 yr). It's not "supposed" to have any relevance on SS.

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    • #3
      If conduct were an issue in rewarding SS then adultery would be just the beginning/start of other things. Would you have a scale weighing bestiality as being worse than someone who participates in weekly S&M? How on earth would you weight the SS? Who was the initiator? Burden of proof? Pedophilia - does the perpetrator need to be charged or can it be a relative? Same Sex Marriage is recognized in many parts of the world but is it a crime and deserving of compensatory SS if one of the parties is married? A young woman is raised in the polygamist community and confesses that she has been having relations with a sister-wife - is this deemed compensatory?

      Who ultimately makes the decision?

      Comment


      • #4
        If conduct were an issue in rewarding SS then adultery would be just the beginning/start of other things. Would you have a scale weighing bestiality as being worse than someone who participates in weekly S&M? How on earth would you weight the SS? Who was the initiator? Burden of proof? Pedophilia - does the perpetrator need to be charged or can it be a relative? Same Sex Marriage is recognized in many parts of the world but is it a crime and deserving of compensatory SS if one of the parties is married? A young woman is raised in the polygamist community and confesses that she has been having relations with a sister-wife - is this deemed compensatory?

        Who ultimately makes the decision?

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Gladtobesingleagain View Post
          Hey everyone,

          Speaking strictly on spousal support and not on child support or any other issue. If one spouse committed adultery, and the couple ended the marriage as a result, would the other party have to pay spousal support?

          Let's say that the non-cheater makes good dough and the philanderer does not.

          What I'm getting at does the law currently take into consideration the conduct (adultery) of a spouse in awarding/not awarding spousal support?

          I'm not in this position merely curious. I would hate to be the guy who works hard all day to keep his wife home only to have her run off with the pool boy then have to pay her wads of cash each month.

          If the law currently does not take conduct into consideration in awarding or not awarding spousal support, do you think it should??

          My vote is yes it should.
          NO. What two consenting adults do is of no relevance. It is "no fault" divorce for a reason. The only thing it gives you is a faster divorce order. But, considering the conflict that an extramarital affair brings to light it would be nearly an impossible feat to get custody and access, equalization and support matters settled and resolved (or by trial) in a year. So even applying for this on divorce is a waste of time and not even worth bothering with.

          It takes on average 2 years to get to trial if you go through the courts and the matter is "high conflict". (Just an observation from posters evidence provided to this site and a review of cases before the court and a personal opinion.)

          You gain nothing and lose more by even worrying about an "extramarital affair".

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by arabian View Post
            If conduct were an issue in rewarding SS then adultery would be just the beginning/start of other things. Would you have a scale weighing bestiality as being worse than someone who participates in weekly S&M? How on earth would you weight the SS? Who was the initiator? Burden of proof? Pedophilia - does the perpetrator need to be charged or can it be a relative? Same Sex Marriage is recognized in many parts of the world but is it a crime and deserving of compensatory SS if one of the parties is married? A young woman is raised in the polygamist community and confesses that she has been having relations with a sister-wife - is this deemed compensatory?

            Who ultimately makes the decision?
            Wow, you love to protect the idea of SS.....all but one of your examples border on absurd and would be covered off as adultry.

            beastility = illegal (most would consider it grosse and adultrous)

            SM = if it is by the married spouses with each other, not adultry by definition. It wouldn't be a factor at all.

            pedophilia = illegal and falls under the definition of adultry of having sexual relations with a 3rd party. Not mention the offending party would likely end up in jail.

            same sex marriage = I fail to see how it has any relevance in terms of adultry. So long as one party doesn't cheat on the other, SS would be treated the same as in a straight marriage.

            polygamy = illegal in Canada and probably the only grey area I can see from your post.

            But besides the point and lack of relevence, adultry is not illegal in Canada and we have "no fault" divorce. The idea behind moving to "no fault" is that it was believed that it would cut down on litigation between divorcing spouses. The courts were getting clogged down by spouses trying to prove/disprove adultry.

            However, from my understanding, it doesn't mean you can't put in fault provisions in a pre-nup.

            Comment


            • #7
              Answer: NO.

              My vote: NO.

              We don't have morality police. Who gets to "decide" what good or bad conduct is? Lots of people are unfaithful to their spouses. I have observed this personally and I've had plenty of married men make a play for me/full out proposition.

              If conduct unbecoming was an issue (and I am not even talking about infidelity): my ex would be locked up and he'd owe me at least a million dollars in compensatory damages.

              Infidelity is absolutely not a factor in divorce.

              Comment


              • #8
                This isn't the US where such things sometimes DO make a difference. Canada is "no fault" divorce. What you do, who you do, etc is of no relevance unless it affects your ability to parent you children.

                If your actions place the children in danger, then you can make a case for it. That being said, it's very very hard to do.

                No one cares who your ex is banging. It only becomes relevant if she's running a lineup in the hallway, with a "now serving #" machine outside her bedroom door. Even then, your kids would have to be serving refreshments to the guys in line, while helping the latest guy cook meth in the kitchen,while he teaches them to call him Daddy.

                And if THAT is happening? Get your ass off this forum and get thee to a lawyer for an ex parte order

                Comment


                • #9
                  Awww NBDad, I always enjoy it when you tell that ("unless") story

                  Comment

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