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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #1  
Old 01-14-2014, 01:30 PM
kidsRworthit kidsRworthit is offline
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Default hearing scheduled: inviting 10 year old to testify

Situation: hearing to determine allegation of death threat from fiance uttered to father

Witnesses: fiance would like to invite 10 year old boy (father's son) as witness to support fiance's position that no death threat was uttered

Benefit of embroiling 10 year old boy in adult issue: father's position is benefit of involving boy at hearing (hockey league) for testimony is outweighed by stress and mental harm of him testifying. Also, parental alienation from mother and fiance are a monumental factor.

Question: is it common that a non-court hearing will factor age of witness, situation in question, and make a determination of what is appropriate.
That is, is it likely that based on this situation, the panel may determine having a 10 year old testify is unreasonable?

Your prompt insight appreciated!
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  #2  
Old 01-14-2014, 01:44 PM
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@KidsRworthIt.....

Never had to deal with any drama like this before, but obviously different countries have diff rules when it comes to kids being witnesses in court matters

In most countries....it is required that the kid is "competent", and able to be cross examined. Now kids process info differently, so you can see how this can be quite daunting.

A good place to start for you might be this folks <--------------

If they can't help, they might know who might be able to
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  #3  
Old 01-14-2014, 01:49 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kidsRworthit! View Post
Situation: hearing to determine allegation of death threat from fiance uttered to father
Is this a criminal trial or family law trial?

Quote:
Originally Posted by kidsRworthit! View Post
Witnesses: fiance would like to invite 10 year old boy (father's son) as witness to support fiance's position that no death threat was uttered
They would have already collected this evidence via video interview with the child if a criminal matter.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kidsRworthit! View Post
Benefit of embroiling 10 year old boy in adult issue:
There is absolutely NO BENEFIT. A parent/organization/litigant who does this to a 10 year old child and even brings this forward as an option will not be held in high regard.

If a death threat was uttered and there is a criminal charge allow the crown to do their job and but out. If this is a family law matter, it is rare that a judge will allow a child to speak at the age of 10 before the court. They would order OCL or Section 30 who is trained to do this if necessary.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kidsRworthit! View Post
father's position is benefit of involving boy at hearing (hockey league) for testimony is outweighed by stress and mental harm of him testifying.
There is no benefit to the child testifying unless it is a criminal matter and the child is a witness. Even then they are very cautious. But, I would leave it up to crown to deal with.

Hockey just isn't that important to utter death threats, file motions, etc... Only 0.003% of players in Ontario will make the NHL (est). Your child has a higher probability of winning a lottery I think than becoming a professional hockey player.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kidsRworthit! View Post
Also, parental alienation from mother and fiance are a monumental factor.
Just to warn you... The chances of a finding of Parental Alienation (PAS) is even worse odds than the child in question making the NHL. You need to read less on the internet about "alienation" and parent more.

There are very few PAS cases out there. If you are going to court about uttering death threats and nonsense like this what your family needs more is everyone to stop being stupid.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kidsRworthit! View Post
Question: is it common that a non-court hearing will factor age of witness, situation in question, and make a determination of what is appropriate.
If your child is being called to "testify" in a review board. Simply do not provide the parental consent. I would also advise the CAS of the organization making the demand and ask them to investigate the matter. No child should be appearing before a tribunal without parental consent.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kidsRworthit! View Post
That is, is it likely that based on this situation, the panel may determine having a 10 year old testify is unreasonable?
It is (a) unreasonable and (b) may be child abuse for this organization to demand a 10 year old minor child to "testify". If this is a review board you should be addressing your concerns with Hockey Canada and NOT this forum.

Quote:
Originally Posted by kidsRworthit! View Post
Your prompt insight appreciated!
You need to disengage in the nonsense. You need to reflect on your own conduct in these matters and think long and hard how you are impacting the children. You are equally to blame in this and you need to seek proper assistance rather than odd messages posted to a public message forum.

You more than the child need the help.

Good Luck!
Tayken
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  #4  
Old 01-14-2014, 04:06 PM
stripes stripes is offline
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The idea of having a ten-year-old testify about not having heard a death threat (if I read you right) is profoundly awful. Children have the right to be protected from adult idiocy, not dragged in like footsoldiers for one parent or the other. If there is a criminal charge in the works, let the criminal justice system do its work and keep out of it. If there is no criminal charge, let it go. I can't fathom anyone even considering using a child in such a fashion.

I also can't believe an organization made up of responsible, non-idiotic adults, like a hockey league, would actually sanction the involvement of a minor child in what is obviously a dispute between two highly conflictual adults.
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Old 01-14-2014, 04:28 PM
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Quote:
an organization made up of responsible, non-idiotic adults, like a hockey league
Ahahahahaha...I nearly fell off my chair reading this, good one

It will seem most of Hockey parents think their kids are going to make it to the big league, and due to this spend their every waking hour and dime driving up and down the country. If only the same energy will be put into the kid(s) education

Getting to the big league is one thing, surviving is another. It's funny how fighting in the game always seems to be OK when it's not their kid that is in a concussion

Last edited by FWB; 01-14-2014 at 04:53 PM.
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  #6  
Old 01-14-2014, 04:45 PM
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I'm sure the 9yr old is not enjoying living a continual nightmare life with these parents. The hockey arguments have been going on for quite some time now (previous posts on this forum dating back to fall of 2012).

I hope the judge issues a restraining order. [edit - I just reread and "hearing" is a hockey league hearing - even worse!]

Totally and utterly disgusting behaviour. Too bad the kid can't live with a relative.

Last edited by arabian; 01-14-2014 at 05:03 PM.
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Old 01-14-2014, 04:55 PM
MS Mom MS Mom is offline
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Now this is a case where things are best left alone. Or, at the very least, leave the kid out of it. And, as the father of that child, you should be doing everything in your power to get your kid out of this adult issue and back onto the playground where he belongs.
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  #8  
Old 01-14-2014, 07:13 PM
stripes stripes is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by arabian View Post
I'm sure the 9yr old is not enjoying living a continual nightmare life with these parents. The hockey arguments have been going on for quite some time now (previous posts on this forum dating back to fall of 2012).

I hope the judge issues a restraining order. [edit - I just reread and "hearing" is a hockey league hearing - even worse!]

Totally and utterly disgusting behaviour. Too bad the kid can't live with a relative.
Because I have infinite amounts of time at my disposal, I clicked on the OP's username and it took me to a page for someone called Stepmom2, who appears to have ongoing issues with hostility towards her husband's ex, going back to 2009 and centering on similar issues (extracurricular expenses, living a couple of hours apart, etc). Don't know if they are the same person, but if so, this depressing saga could play out for years.
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  #9  
Old 01-14-2014, 07:16 PM
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yeah I think it's possibly the same person... my computer hiccuped when I checked the old posts as well... probably a name change at one time
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  #10  
Old 01-14-2014, 07:34 PM
Qrious Qrious is offline
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I read and reread the OP's post.

I cannot for the life of me figure out why a minor hockey league would give a rat's a$$ about one adult uttering a threat to another. And then hold a "hearing" over it? What?

Can someone clear this up for me? What am I missing?
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