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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 08-22-2013, 06:15 PM
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arabian arabian is offline
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SadandTired - review old threads. Story is inconsistent, particularly regarding wife's educational credentials. I believe he tried to have income imputed at one time.
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  #12  
Old 08-22-2013, 06:42 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Originally Posted by SadAndTired View Post
How is this even useful? Waste of post space for someone needing advice.
how was your post useful then??? Just your little dig at Tayken again. Please its gettting old.
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  #13  
Old 08-22-2013, 07:06 PM
SadAndTired SadAndTired is offline
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Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
how was your post useful then??? Just your little dig at Tayken again. Please its gettting old.
About the same as yours SOTS. Feel better now?

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  #14  
Old 08-22-2013, 10:23 PM
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Tayken Tayken is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sahibjee View Post
...

Wife made multitude of false allegations causing repeated false arrests (eventually withdrawn by crown) of the husband which lead to an initial employer & doctor advised Short Term Disability leave, persistent poor performance at work due to stress & anxiety and eventual termination by the employer in early March 2013. there was a severance package of 5 months, the husband kept paying CS & SS via FRO until the package ran out in August 2013.
If the party to this matter you are describing failed to notify the other party receiving CS and SS at the time of termination the courts will ask why notice wasn't provided at that time?

Hopefully you did the right thing and notified the other party you were terminated and that your severance would run out in 5 months and that in the event you were not working by that time SS can CS would have to be adjusted. You could have even made a comprehensive offer to settle that outlines this.

You can still make an offer to settle to adjust SS and CS to your EI that you will be getting shortly. For the 5 months the courts would have made you pay full SS and CS in accordance with the order/agreement in place as the income was coming in.

If you are unemployed then this is a material change in circumstance and you can go to court to get CS and SS adjusted... But, I would recommend to do first through an offer to settle. Then failing that take it on motion. You have costs coverage should you have to go on motion by the offer to settle.

Also, you should be actively seeking employment. You are going to be expected to return to work. Also, if you are too anxious to work, you may be too anxious to care for a child. Be very careful with how you present your "evidence" as to why you are not working and got fired.


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Originally Posted by sahibjee View Post
Additional Factors:

1- Husband worked at same job for 7 years and was trained in their niche applications developed in 1980s and needs significant retraining in order to be re-employable.
Really. You program Smalltalk or something? Honestly, if you know a legacy software language (e.g. COBOL) you are worth your weight in gold. So, I wouldn't use that argument really. What "niche" after 7 years doesn't exist anymore in software market? The Java Platform is like 18 years old this year... I really don't buy this excuse... Unless you are programming in prolog don't use this lame excuse. Software engineering (applications development) is highly transferable. Even software platforms developed in the 1980s.

Go pickup a Ruby On Rails book... Start training yourself now. If you can program in one language you can program in others...

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahibjee View Post
2- Wife 28 years old, holds a master's degree & a diploma in early childhood education, 11 months after separation (Sept 2012) she found a contract position at minimum wage but quit her job with in a week of the husband's termination
What is her "masters" in. It is odd that someone with a masters degree would complete a masters level education. Which came first the ECE or the masters degree? What the "mastesr" is in matters.

Either way, the other parent is capable of working is your point. But, you need to clarify better on the education to the court if you are going to argue this. If the best the person can be is an ECE... Then it is really a minimum wage job or slightly better. ECE is quite a common educational designation...


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Originally Posted by sahibjee View Post
3- Next day from the husband's termination, wife calls his employer's receptionist "to make sure the husband was fired from job" the husband is informed by the receptionist and embarrassed.
The employer should have advised the person calling that the information is confidential and notified the caller that they do not give out this information and hung up the phone. Also, the husband shouldn't be embarrassed... The husband was already let go from the position for poor performance. This evidence is irrelivant... how do you demonstrate you were "embarrassed" what do you expect a judge to do with the evidence? Order the other party to not call people? Not be stupid about things?

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahibjee View Post
4- during July 2013 the husband was communicating with his ex-boss to see if they would rehire him. the wife shows up at the employer's office and demands to talk to husband's ex-boss, she then spreads false rumors that husband is a bad man & is suing her for two billion dollars (whaaat?) the ex-boss told the husband that he will still be bugged by ex-wife and hence no rehiring
Doubt this "evidence". You were terminated from your position. Also, the "boss" would have simply called the police (or someone at the office) and had the person removed from the office if it was this bad.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahibjee View Post
5- Husband may get EI before next court date.
Then CS and SS should reflect the EI payments... But, I wouldn't leverage any of the above numbered points as "evidence" if I were you... They are all crappy.

Quote:
Originally Posted by sahibjee View Post
what is a reasonable position on CS & SS at a settlement conference coming up in September? the settlement confernce is 60 minutes long!
Reasonable position is that there was a material change in circumstance, you got fired, got 5 months severance, paid support for the 5 months based on the actual income, you are now going to EI as you haven't found employment, the SS and CS needs to change to reflect your actual income and when you become employed full time re-adjusted at that time to what you are making.

It isn't 60 minutes of you lamenting about all the above nonsense. It won't buy you anything from a judge in my opinion.

Good Luck!
Tayken
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  #15  
Old 08-23-2013, 12:44 AM
sahibjee sahibjee is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Tayken View Post
If the party to this matter you are describing failed to notify the other party receiving CS and SS at the time of termination the courts will ask why notice wasn't provided at that time?

Hopefully you did the right thing and notified the other party you were terminated and that your severance would run out in 5 months and that in the event you were not working by that time SS can CS would have to be adjusted. You could have even made a comprehensive offer to settle that outlines this.
Thank you for your very valuable input Tayken. She was informed the same day in person and I even showed her the termination letter, I have an email from her in which she mentions seeing the termination letter.

Quote:
Also, you should be actively seeking employment. You are going to be expected to return to work. Also, if you are too anxious to work, you may be too anxious to care for a child. Be very careful with how you present your "evidence" as to why you are not working and got fired.
anxiety did get me fired, but the reason i am unemployed now is because i couldn't find a job yet.

Quote:
Really. You program Smalltalk or something? Honestly, if you know a legacy software language (e.g. COBOL) you are worth your weight in gold. So, I wouldn't use that argument really. What "niche" after 7 years doesn't exist anymore in software market? The Java Platform is like 18 years old this year... I really don't buy this excuse... Unless you are programming in prolog don't use this lame excuse. Software engineering (applications development) is highly transferable. Even software platforms developed in the 1980s.

Go pickup a Ruby On Rails book... Start training yourself now. If you can program in one language you can program in others...
I was not a developer, I was in a "development support" role (fixing the day to day stuff that goes wrong on the servers i.e, tracing "where" the problem is in the server and then redirecting to the actual developers to figure out the root cause & provide resolution)

the programs were written in a language called "Progress" let me know if you have ever heard of it? I only know couple of other companies who use this language in GTA and even they are phasing it out. - perhaps this is what i should tell the judge?

I am indeed trying to retrain myself on new technologies, but certainly I cant get hired at a senior position using a skill i just learned.

Quote:
What is her "masters" in. It is odd that someone with a masters degree would complete a masters level education. Which came first the ECE or the masters degree? What the "mastesr" is in matters. Either way, the other parent is capable of working is your point. But, you need to clarify better on the education to the court if you are going to argue this. If the best the person can be is an ECE... Then it is really a minimum wage job or slightly better. ECE is quite a common educational designation...
Masters in geography, apparently with distinction (though i have not seen the gold medal she claims she got) ECE came after the masters, apparently she wanted to become a teacher (and did teach for a year).

Quote:
The employer should have advised the person calling that the information is confidential and notified the caller that they do not give out this information and hung up the phone. Also, the husband shouldn't be embarrassed... The husband was already let go from the position for poor performance. This evidence is irrelivant... how do you demonstrate you were "embarrassed" what do you expect a judge to do with the evidence? Order the other party to not call people? Not be stupid about things?
Embarrassed because you develop a rapport with the people you work with, and your ex calling to "make sure" that you were fired, isnt that embarrassing, specially the person who received the call doesn't know that you were separated?

Quote:
Doubt this "evidence". You were terminated from your position. Also, the "boss" would have simply called the police (or someone at the office) and had the person removed from the office if it was this bad.
Indeed i was terminated, but i did not have a bad relationship with my ex-boss, he actually apologized for terminating my position and pinned it on his boss and said "out of my hands buddy". I talk to many of my ex-colleagues once in a while and have very good relations with my other ex-bosses who moved on higher within the company or elsewhere.
I am not sure if she created a scene there, i never claimed that, All i learned was about her allegations and that there isnt a possibility of re-hiring. but if its not good evidence then I should just keep it out of the affidavit.

Quote:
Then CS and SS should reflect the EI payments... But, I wouldn't leverage any of the above numbered points as "evidence" if I were you... They are all crappy.

Reasonable position is that there was a material change in circumstance, you got fired, got 5 months severance, paid support for the 5 months based on the actual income, you are now going to EI as you haven't found employment, the SS and CS needs to change to reflect your actual income and when you become employed full time re-adjusted at that time to what you are making.
Shouldnt I be asking for termination of CS based on the length of marriage & the duration i have already paid in addition to having no ability to pay any longer?

Quote:
It isn't 60 minutes of you lamenting about all the above nonsense. It won't buy you anything from a judge in my opinion.

Good Luck!
Tayken
Agreed, we need to convert this nonsense into arguments that can get the required results.

Last edited by sahibjee; 08-23-2013 at 01:02 AM.
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  #16  
Old 08-23-2013, 06:52 AM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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I wouldnt mention about only a few companies using the program and that others were phasing it out. Makes it sound like you were in a job that was going to disapppear due to being obsolete.

The person in the office was in the wrong if they mentioned anything to your ex when she called.

You may have showed the ex the termination letter but did you talk about reducing CS and stopping SS. You should have maybe started legal stuff then.

You mention in your post about terminating CS but I take it you meant SS?
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  #17  
Old 08-23-2013, 01:39 PM
Pursuinghappiness Pursuinghappiness is offline
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I thought about it, and as much as I am sure that my ex-boss may even be willing to do it, i am more than sure that ex will take that affidavit and go back to the office and try to create problems for my ex-boss or have him fired based on such affidavit.
Fired for what?

If you can show damages here, ie. lost wages due to slander...you could actually sue her.

Not to mention that by doing nothing about this type of conduct, you set-up a precedence by which she may think she could do it again.

If I were you, I'd be worried about your next job too if this is what she does and you do nothing about it. I guarantee you that if my ex walked on to my job and did this nonsense, he'd be getting sued...period.

Last edited by Pursuinghappiness; 08-23-2013 at 01:41 PM.
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  #18  
Old 08-23-2013, 06:20 PM
sahibjee sahibjee is offline
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Originally Posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
I wouldnt mention about only a few companies using the program and that others were phasing it out. Makes it sound like you were in a job that was going to disapppear due to being obsolete.

The person in the office was in the wrong if they mentioned anything to your ex when she called.

You may have showed the ex the termination letter but did you talk about reducing CS and stopping SS. You should have maybe started legal stuff then.

You mention in your post about terminating CS but I take it you meant SS?
Yes an email was sent to her requesting her position on CS & SS given the new circumstances, she never responded. actually i went to see duty counsel at the time and she advised that I can claim SS (which i dont think would have gotten anywhere so i did not proceed with that) but i did send that information via email. and i think she got scared to having to pay me and ran to quit her job.

Yes i did mean to say termination of SS and not CS. I will have to find a way to continue giving CS according to my new income.
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  #19  
Old 08-23-2013, 06:26 PM
sahibjee sahibjee is offline
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Originally Posted by Pursuinghappiness View Post
If I were you, I'd be worried about your next job too if this is what she does and you do nothing about it. I guarantee you that if my ex walked on to my job and did this nonsense, he'd be getting sued...period.
this is a good argument right here. but suing her would lead nowhere most civil suits for these kind of things get thrown out.
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  #20  
Old 08-23-2013, 06:56 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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Originally Posted by sahibjee View Post
Yes an email was sent to her requesting her position on CS & SS given the new circumstances, she never responded. actually i went to see duty counsel at the time and she advised that I can claim SS (which i dont think would have gotten anywhere so i did not proceed with that) but i did send that information via email. and i think she got scared to having to pay me and ran to quit her job.

Yes i did mean to say termination of SS and not CS. I will have to find a way to continue giving CS according to my new income.
It would have been nice if she would have been a stand up type of person and worked with you on it. I really wish you luck on this.

Piece of advice, dont give your ex a heads up on what you may do. As you stated, once you told that that you may be able to claim SS, she quit to try and avoid it. You know what she is like now so play your cards close to your chest from now on.
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