Ottawa Divorce .com Forums


User CP

New posts

Advertising

  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Divorce & Family Law

Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old 04-11-2012, 04:59 PM
AdTheDad AdTheDad is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alberta
Posts: 33
AdTheDad is on a distinguished road
Exclamation What Has to Be Done In A Trial - Self-Represented

Hi,

I'm going to trial for 5 days next week and I am self-represented. While I still can't believe I'm divorcing, I am. And I have 5 kids that are being put through a ringer for the 2nd year, thanks to an unstable wife that I somehow love(d). Despite sharing a low income from my job, she got Legal Aid and I was refused.

Can I get people's experiences from what had to be done in court? For example, are submissions required and if so, what had to be submitted? How long are opening comments? Have you ever had the Justice cut you off for going on too long? Was there anything that really pissed off the Justice? Do you have any Alberta specific advice? If you got sole custody or joint, was there any key factor the Justice cared about or a key law/case law that helped?
  #2  
Old 04-11-2012, 06:12 PM
cynthia10 cynthia10 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 103
cynthia10 is on a distinguished road
Default

I just went through it, I was self-rep after 2 years of notta happening, and don't get me wrong I adored my lawyer. I was the respondent, mom of 3 great boys now almost 18 (twins) and a almost 13 year old, he basically abandoned, lied and caused all this BS to impress Chicky, now wants all sorts of access to the little one( he is now 6ft tall LOL)....I had really no time to prepare for real..went in for last ditch conference to settle.....they wanted more OCL involvement.to observe him with little one at his moms home where he lives now after having baby with Chicky who already has 3 others by 2 dads BLAH BLAH.....after 4 years enough...I have no issue with him being with his son as long as it is my sons choice.....at 13 he should get to decide....okay so enough back story....avoid court if at all possible.....keeping the children's best interests at heart of course...as I said I was kind of ready but not for the vultures.....if you are the respondent...wait, you don't have to make an opening statement and search this site for a great document that is handed out to self litigants in Ontario. Exclude all witness from the courtroom.be calm and listen to how the lawyer for the other side does things.take notes on the things you want to cross examine on but have some of your own questions ready.....stick to the facts and the issues.....dont be overwhelmed with being hurt by the bad things they say about you....it doesn't have to become nasty....hold your head high, say what you think is fair and right and be compromising...if they try to rip you as the bad one you will look all the better for being graceful and calm. This site has helped me in more ways then I can say so do your homework, it is worth it and stay strong for your kids....make it peaceful as you can...
  #3  
Old 04-11-2012, 06:39 PM
arabian's Avatar
arabian arabian is online now
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Western Canada
Posts: 10,580
arabian will become famous soon enough
Default

Hate to say it but I don't think you will do very well as you appear to be totally unprepared. I'd try to get the whole thing put off to a later date until you do your homework and have the confidence you will need to do what you have to do.
  #4  
Old 04-11-2012, 07:53 PM
cynthia10 cynthia10 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2012
Posts: 103
cynthia10 is on a distinguished road
Default

arabian is 100 percent right....we dont know enough about what the details are and you should do homework and be prepared...like get a firm idea of the issues..etc....and stick to them....who is the applicant/ respondent makes a difference on the onus of proof....which is on the applicant....so give us more detail to help you....
  #5  
Old 04-11-2012, 11:14 PM
beebie beebie is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 300
beebie is on a distinguished road
Default

I'm in Alberta. Are you sure you are going to trial with no prior submissions? Or are just going to a docket court? QB or Provincial?

What are your issues?
  #6  
Old 04-12-2012, 12:29 AM
AdTheDad AdTheDad is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alberta
Posts: 33
AdTheDad is on a distinguished road
Default

Tons of issues, been in court thanks to STBXW over 10 times in a year. I'm not asking for "what should I do".
(Thanks for your experiences Cynthia10)

Rather, if someone can share their experiences so I can better prepare emotionally. I'd also love to know about experiences that can help me re-examine how to go to court against someone I don't want to hurt (even though she loves hurting me).

It's a divorce/mat property, so it's in QB. There are tons of affidavits and other things on file, but it is 'viva voce' (spoken).
  #7  
Old 04-12-2012, 01:00 AM
arabian's Avatar
arabian arabian is online now
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Western Canada
Posts: 10,580
arabian will become famous soon enough
Default

In court over 10 times in a year???? I have to say this is why I detest self-represented people. Judges seem to think they have to be extra lenient with the self-represented and all it does is clog the courts and run up the opposing counsel bills. If you've been to court "over 10 times in a year" then you're obviously doing something wrong. For a start, if you already haven't don it,request case management and then your endless applications will go to just one judge and that judge can rein you in.

Sounds like by the time you're through clogging the court system your children will be grown up and out on their own.

If you want to be prepared brace yourself for (hopefully) getting a judge with some sense who will put you in your place.

Yikes!
  #8  
Old 04-12-2012, 01:04 AM
AdTheDad AdTheDad is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Alberta
Posts: 33
AdTheDad is on a distinguished road
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by arabian View Post
In court over 10 times in a year???? I have to say this is why I detest self-represented people.
What the hell is wrong with you? No wonder you're on a divorce forum.

FYI - they were my wife's Legal Aid lawyer's applications and 4 of them happened in one month.

Jeez. Get a life "arabian".
  #9  
Old 04-12-2012, 01:07 AM
beebie beebie is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 300
beebie is on a distinguished road
Default

Well given that he is self rep and has "tons of issues" and is asking for advice one week before trial and not even advice on "what he should do" but only how to get "emotionally prepared" to keep on fighting, I guess we get the picture.

What he should do is hire a lawyer.

A trained mediator or arbitrator would have been cheaper and faster.
  #10  
Old 04-12-2012, 01:11 AM
arabian's Avatar
arabian arabian is online now
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Western Canada
Posts: 10,580
arabian will become famous soon enough
Default

Could you name the Alberta justices that you have been in front of - I'm keenly interested in which ones have "passed the buck" with your case and not had you on case management. Disgusting waste of our tax dollars, your emotional energy and only enhances a poisonous relationship between you and your ex. What a waste of time.... what a waste of your life.
Closed Thread

Tags
divorce, experience, trial


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Trial - Day 1 experience fieldgrey Divorce & Family Law 8 06-23-2011 10:14 PM
Trial - Day 4 experience fieldgrey Divorce & Family Law 12 06-18-2011 07:44 AM
Trial - Day 3 experience fieldgrey Divorce & Family Law 6 05-26-2011 10:22 AM
Trial Managment Documents and Process Cobourg Divorce & Family Law 3 09-10-2010 01:02 PM
Case Conference and continueing record serrona Divorce & Family Law 5 01-12-2007 05:55 PM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:20 AM.