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Parenting Issues This forum is for discussing any of the parenting issues involved in your divorce, including parenting of step-children.

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  #21  
Old 07-22-2013, 01:55 PM
kidsRworthit kidsRworthit is offline
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Default Yes, you've spotted the cameleon

Good call...and always look forward to reading your highly insightful posts; in addition to posts of others of your ilk.

I'm the person who delved into Hockey Canada rules in an effort to understand residency requirements...

I've been allowed to change my userID to one which resonates with me, as opposed to name descriptive. (which I setup in a time of emotional stress)
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  #22  
Old 10-02-2013, 04:45 PM
DontGiveUp DontGiveUp is offline
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Hi All,

Any suggestions for an offer of settlement on how I propose a build up to a 2-2-5-5 (50/50 schedule)

I'm thinking of suggesting after 6 months of a build up to it.

Right now I am essentially Fri eve to Mon a.m. and an alternative Sun eve to Mon a.m.
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  #23  
Old 10-02-2013, 05:27 PM
FB_ FB_ is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DontGiveUp View Post
Hi All,

Any suggestions for an offer of settlement on how I propose a build up to a 2-2-5-5 (50/50 schedule)

I'm thinking of suggesting after 6 months of a build up to it.

Right now I am essentially Fri eve to Mon a.m. and an alternative Sun eve to Mon a.m.
They are either for it or not, how would a progressive approach help in your situation?
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  #24  
Old 10-02-2013, 05:31 PM
DontGiveUp DontGiveUp is offline
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I'm trying to revise the current access time / schedule to be in line with an eventual jump to 50/50 time using the 2-2-5-5-.

I'm suggesting how best to change what I have now, add maybe an additional evening and present it as a logical plan to gradual 2-2-5-5

Not sure what you mean by a progressive approach in my situation?

The other party, and likely a judge whether offering opinion on it in SC or a judge ruling on it at a trial would have trouble giving me directly a 50/50 arrangement right from what I have today and listed above. Looking to add an evening now (a change in status quo) and jump to 2-2-5-5 maybe 6 months after that?
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  #25  
Old 10-02-2013, 06:07 PM
firhill firhill is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DontGiveUp View Post

Not sure what you mean by a progressive approach in my situation?
Progressive approach = graduated access increase, I believe.

Quote:
Originally Posted by DontGiveUp View Post
I'm trying to revise the current access time / schedule to be in line with an eventual jump to 50/50 time using the 2-2-5-5-.

I'm suggesting how best to change what I have now, add maybe an additional evening and present it as a logical plan to gradual 2-2-5-5

The other party, and likely a judge whether offering opinion on it in SC or a judge ruling on it at a trial would have trouble giving me directly a 50/50 arrangement right from what I have today and listed above. Looking to add an evening now (a change in status quo) and jump to 2-2-5-5 maybe 6 months after that?

If the child is not in school, maybe have the 50/50 access coincide with starting school.

FWIW, pretty much every conference judge suggested that we should use a graduated increase in access to get to a point that is agreeable to both sides.

SC (male) judge suggested we should eventually reach 50/50.
TMC (female) judge basically said there's no way I would obtain 50/50 access and should be happy with a slight increase over what I have now.
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  #26  
Old 10-03-2013, 09:53 AM
DontGiveUp DontGiveUp is offline
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Yes, my SC judge (female) was not very pro my case on access and custody where as my CC judge (female) totally was. This is for an additional SC with the same SC judge as before.

Children are in school. I'm not sure what new access schedule to start with in the SC brief to then through progressive approach get to a 2-2-5-5
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  #27  
Old 11-04-2016, 10:13 AM
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Default

Putting this comment from another thread in here because it is great:

http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...tml#post213464

Quote:
Four of the days are completely stable and known.

I can plan activities for the kids on Wednesday and Thursday because I have them. If I sign up a kid for dance lessons on Wednesdays, I know that she will be able to go because I have her every Wednesday. I don't have to even consult my ex.

I can go to my band practice on Tuesdays and have my pottery on Monday because I am kid free every single Tuesday and Monday. Parental stability has some value too.

One of my kids has a regular weekday playdate. See how I used the word "regular"? That is what makes 5-5-2-2 so incredibly wonderful.

Weekends are unstable, but weekends are unstable for almost every single possible custody schedule, since they all pretty much alternate weekends. You can't hold that against the 5-5-2-2.

As for the "settling down period" nonsense, isn't that some Judith Wallerstein crap? Anecdotally, my kids have a roughly 60 second settling down period, maybe less. They usually call me "mom" for the first hour and then laugh about it. All my divorced friends run 5-5-2-2, and none of us has had transition issues... and we all started with very very young kids.
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