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  • Therapist/ counsellor

    We are trying to find a therapist or counsellor for young teenagers in Ottawa. They are very resistant. They have no visitation with their mother at their request. Mom alleges parental alienation but there has been a lot of emotional abuse in her home and the children were told by her to leave last year after several years of serious upheaval. She wishes to repair that relationship. We just want to give them a voice and hope that they can come to some understanding that allows them to have some healthy contact with her. They have been much happier but of course the loss of the mother whatever the circumstances will have huge effects. So essentially - we need someone who has experience with dealing with very reluctant children, some personality disordered traits in the parent, children of divorce (I guess high conflict, but it's parallel parenting out of necessity so not much conflict now). Any recommendations?

  • #2
    Originally posted by Cailin View Post
    We are trying to find a therapist or counsellor for young teenagers in Ottawa. They are very resistant. They have no visitation with their mother at their request. Mom alleges parental alienation but there has been a lot of emotional abuse in her home and the children were told by her to leave last year after several years of serious upheaval. She wishes to repair that relationship. We just want to give them a voice and hope that they can come to some understanding that allows them to have some healthy contact with her. They have been much happier but of course the loss of the mother whatever the circumstances will have huge effects. So essentially - we need someone who has experience with dealing with very reluctant children, some personality disordered traits in the parent, children of divorce (I guess high conflict, but it's parallel parenting out of necessity so not much conflict now). Any recommendations?

    Are you and Mom working together to find a therapist, or is this coming solely from the parent whom the kids are currently living with? The words "alleges parental alienation" and "of course, the loss of the mother" raise a lot of yellow flags, as does the "personality disordered" diagnosis of Mom.

    If you and Mom agree that you will both participate in choosing a counsellor (and can also agree that neither parent will have any input into the content of the counselling sessions - counselling is not meant to produce a definite outcome, but to give the kids a safe and completely confidential place to express feelings), why not ask the guidance counsellor at the kids' school?

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    • #3
      This might sound odd, but try calling children's aid. They have a lot of relationships that they can recommend. I'm not asking you to report your ex for anything.

      You may also be eligible for a children's psychiatrist if you're trying to assess PAS. My son's has given me some good advice for dealing with my new found D15

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