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Need an urgent advise. I am truly mad as it concerns the child

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  • Originally posted by rockscan View Post
    It takes two to tango though. There�s no sense in getting into a dirt fight with someone who just wants to fling shit. If he wants to take you to court simply to say you�re a bad parent so be it. But he isn�t willing to take the kid for more than two hours. So truly there is no fight. The response is ive given you six hours you want two. The end.

    The real fight is money and that is where you need a good lawyer who won�t take shit.
    He goes to court asking for 3 hrs to switch to 6 hours.

    The judge said, child is minor, go with less hours.

    I don't want to have myself repeated.

    He went to court asking what was given and even more. But he says, it is not true. I have not seen the child for a year because mother did not let me.

    He accused me falsely she I had all evidence it was not true.

    Thanks to my lawyer, Judge had 0 documents from me during trial. Not even replies, notice of motion... His lawyer said he was coming every week but with late notice, which is not true. He was not coming. My lawyer kept quiet.

    Comment


    • Originally posted by StillPaying View Post
      I was going to say the same about clients like yourself...
      Pretend, contradict, don't understand forum rules let alone anything to do with court.

      I do wish your lawyers luck!

      I would say that some cultures have different approaches to parenting, marriage, divorce, money etc and it may be a factor in this case. English as a second language also factors in due to misunderstandings with words, tense and explanations.

      I also think for this poster it is a lot of wanting to defend herself against her ex who likes to talk smack. She appears to get angry easily when challenged which is a terrible reaction.

      OP stop letting your ex get under your skin or expect your lawyer to do battle. My husband’s lawyer was fully honest with us that he would not get into the weeds with the ex over her lies and manipulation. It could very well be that your lawyer wasn’t going to go down that path. And the court processes with filing arent the greatest at the moment and your lawyer is also not responsible for the judge downloading and reading shit. Let it go and stop flying off the handle.

      Comment


      • For those who remember...

        This reads as if Luba came to this forum and not WorkingDad.

        I suspect that this is going to be some fun reading in CANLII one day.

        Comment


        • Most are consistant, yet many times here you'll see users who's idiolect changes with each post; easy to tell. Then the more details they provide, the more the story changes. Ignoring the obvious and focused on irrelevant drama.

          Comment


          • Originally posted by rockscan View Post
            I would say that some cultures have different approaches to parenting, marriage, divorce, money etc and it may be a factor in this case. English as a second language also factors in due to misunderstandings with words, tense and explanations.

            I also think for this poster it is a lot of wanting to defend herself against her ex who likes to talk smack. She appears to get angry easily when challenged which is a terrible reaction.

            OP stop letting your ex get under your skin or expect your lawyer to do battle. My husband�s lawyer was fully honest with us that he would not get into the weeds with the ex over her lies and manipulation. It could very well be that your lawyer wasn�t going to go down that path. And the court processes with filing arent the greatest at the moment and your lawyer is also not responsible for the judge downloading and reading shit. Let it go and stop flying off the handle.
            You are on spot.

            1. In my country, women get killed by their ex husband's every day. Those men considered as hero
            2. Women cannot leave the man... Not I've at least. It is not because he is in love or jealous. It is how they were raised - man is a man and woman should obey
            3. Mother's get killed by their spouses every day right in front of their children. Children sadly get killed too
            4. No woman is allowed to tell the man - leave. Only man can tell it's over.
            5. Man do not raise their children. They are busy with their mistresses, while wives raise their children, cook food and so on.
            6. As for the child support - a whole different discussion. Men don't pay that.
            7. Father's do not go out playgrounds, change diapers or feeding their own children. Not even once in a month.

            There are men that are with dignity and honour. They respect their wives. That number is so small, It is ridiculous.

            Comment


            • Originally posted by StillPaying View Post
              Most are consistant, yet many times here you'll see users who's idiolect changes with each post; easy to tell. Then the more details they provide, the more the story changes. Ignoring the obvious and focused on irrelevant drama.
              Well, anybody would have had an issue if was taken to court with false accusations and then have your lawyer not upload anything to the portal.

              Comment


              • I have fired my Russia speaking lawyer. Sent her an email first.

                She called me 2 hours later asking what happened. I have explained that I need to change the lawyer and thanked her for her service.

                Then she began threatening me, telling me that she gonna make me lose my custody, she will talk to the other side and make my life hell, because I have expressed my concern for the safety of the child.

                She said, the other side will sue me and the Judge I have will ruin me.
                While she was saying that, she asked, do you still want to fire me?
                I was like, oh hell, after all this, I am, for sure.

                Luckily, I have recorded the entire conversation.

                I told her that I was not happy the way she represented my case. Never replied my phone calls, made me send her same emails 10 times and charges for each. Kept working with the other side on ridiculous offers to settle when you knew it won't be happening. Parenting time issue was not an issue at all. But you guys made it such a way, so eventually it will be me who is at fault. Because of you, my ex was doing all this, because he realized what kind of lawyer I am having.

                For the Judge, it all appeared that I was creating barriers for the father not see the child; you knew nothing about my case and you did not make sure my files were there on time.

                It was your job, I told her, to solve this, because you knew, the other party does not come for visits. You needed to bring this up back then, when was gone for 7 months or even from before, harrasing me at 10 PM, demanding to see the child. I told her, you could have stopped this and we wouldn't be in court now.

                You dragged this to make it look like I am a bad guy. Why do you care about the other side so much?

                I also told her, you probably want me to cover his cost for court, because pretty much he had 2 lawyers in court, while I seemed had none.

                You ask me to document everything but you never looked into my evidence. No files were uploaded and no replies or a single file was provided to Judge ahead of time.

                She said, who cares about your evidence? I don't care about evidence.

                Judge does not care either. You can document all what you want, he will never look into them. He cares about what he and she says.

                Don't think you can defeat your ex because he is way smarter.

                Also, she said that the Father lies about his address because he wants to pay less for a car insurance. I told her, but in court, he used that address as the reason he cannot care for the child because he lives that far. She said again, Judges do not care about any evidences. So you don't have to document and relax.

                Anyway, I was trying to explain reasons why I cannot work with her any longer, but she was pretty much threatening me. She said, it is not you but me who does not want to work with you.

                I am going to call 911 and tell them you afraid for the safety of your child and yourself, so your ex can go after you and put you in jail.

                Here is the thing: the moment I told her that I have hired private investigator to prove his address, my ex disappeared from that address and took a while to collect the proof.

                Now I realize that she was sending him all my confidential information.

                My lawyer said, my ex is the nicest person she met, which led me to believe, they have worked together against me.

                Maybe that's why he did not show up for months and went to court with an emergency motion with confidence to demand for parenting time knowing ahead of time, my lawyer will not do anything. And it will still look like he appeared every week, which is what Judge believed to.

                The good thing is, I have fired her. And all her ridiculous threats will be reported.

                She sent an email with angry stuff, I am pretty sure, secretly forward to the other side, to make it look like she refused to work with me, but replied to my email where I have sent the termination of service letter earlier.

                But my faith in justice system has disappeared.

                Maybe I should let the other side do whatever he wants? Who going to believe me, with proofs and evidence, if the one has nothing will prevail?

                So why do people go to court if Judges make their judgement based on he and she say?

                Should I just leave everything, forget about parenting time, go with the time he wants, let him show up whenever he wants; pay whatever he wants, as I no longer believe in evidence.

                For some of you it will appear as a nutshell or thinking, why do I care.

                But should I be worried when my lawyer seems flipped and worked to benefit my ex?

                How does she know he is the nicest person?

                How does she know he uses that address for Insurance?

                How does she know that he is very calm and very quiet person who likes to smile and very sociable?

                Comment


                • You’re worrying too much about this. Walk away and work with your new lawyer. A judge doesn’t care about this and clearly this woman was playing on all your fears.

                  She is right that the judge doesn’t care about all the shit you provided. Focus your efforts on being smarter rather than angrier and controlling.

                  And report the lawyer.

                  Comment


                  • Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                    You�re worrying too much about this. Walk away and work with your new lawyer. A judge doesn�t care about this and clearly this woman was playing on all your fears.

                    She is right that the judge doesn�t care about all the shit you provided. Focus your efforts on being smarter rather than angrier and controlling.

                    And report the lawyer.
                    The shit you call is evidence that I was giving the child.
                    Andd the entire motion was nonsense. She knew that. That's what I was worried about.

                    Control stuff comes from the other side.

                    If the other side says - I was by the child's door every day and the mother did not give the child is OK and strong evidence. But if I provide hard proof, it's a BS?

                    But I am happy I am having a new lawyer, who can fix it up and finish the entire mess quickly and leave this part of life behind.

                    But it is good to know that we cannot go to court with evidence, because eventually the one who lies win.

                    That's not the message we want to send to all other men and women that were brought to court with false allegations.

                    Comment


                    • Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                      And report the lawyer.
                      I will report her tonight.

                      Comment


                      • No you do need to have evidence but video of him during visitation and things like that are not necessary. And it doesn’t matter if he lives next door or down the street. The bottom line is he is entitled to see his kid. Being a bad father isn’t a crime.

                        Here’s an example. For proof for parenting time, providing messages that show he told you he isn’t coming is better proof than saying he didn’t show. Messages saying he only wants two hours aren’t relevant.

                        You have to look at what he is asking for and what your response is.

                        You are so muddled up in anger that it is hard to understand what the case actually is and what will reasonably happen. Listen to your new lawyer, set aside your anger over his actions and stop letting your emotions get the better of you.

                        Comment


                        • Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                          No you do need to have evidence but video of him during visitation and things like that are not necessary. And it doesn�t matter if he lives next door or down the street. The bottom line is he is entitled to see his kid. Being a bad father isn�t a crime.

                          Here�s an example. For proof for parenting time, providing messages that show he told you he isn�t coming is better proof than saying he didn�t show. Messages saying he only wants two hours aren�t relevant.

                          You have to look at what he is asking for and what your response is.

                          You are so muddled up in anger that it is hard to understand what the case actually is and what will reasonably happen. Listen to your new lawyer, set aside your anger over his actions and stop letting your emotions get the better of you.
                          Got it.
                          But he did not show. But even if he did, did only on his terms.

                          How about proof such as - he was not taking the child when I was giving him and disappeared from the child's life?
                          I told him, take for an hour, 2 or 3 or 4 or 5. He never took any of those.

                          As for the timing, I am giving that time.

                          But he tells Judge that I am not.

                          For all other advises, thanks a lot.

                          My goal is for him to have 6 hours visit each time.
                          Every other Saturday. He asks for 3 hours each Saturday.
                          I am telling you, he will not take those hours. But the Judge will give it to him and I will be happy about that. But I am already giving this hours to him. That is my point.

                          If he won't exercise them and asks for less, that schedule will have to be modified. But that’s something to deal with later.

                          Comment


                          • Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                            You have to look at what he is asking for and what your response is.
                            When he asks for 2 hrs, I say - Yes, sir.
                            When he cancels, I reply, no problem.
                            But he goes to court and says something else.

                            But anyway, that's going to change.

                            You are right, I am getting angry or frustrated when someone accuses me like that.

                            But I am going to let the new lawyer to deal with it.

                            For instance, my old lawyer said, report if the child comes home dirty after visit. I was like, do I have to report daycare too, because the child returns from daycare dirty all the time.

                            Things like that do not bother me at all. My focus is child's needs and safety. As long as he is able to provide it for a short amount of time, I am ok with that.

                            Again, I know he is entitled to see the child and that right I have never tried to take from him. I never did and will never do.

                            Comment


                            • Originally posted by anotherday View Post
                              anyway, stay away from the russian speaking lawyers. All of them are corrupt.
                              Slava Bohu, shcho ya ne moskal

                              Last edited by Tayken; 07-16-2022, 11:08 PM.

                              Comment

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