Get a lawyer, you will eat him alive.
He has no idea what is coming. You are going to get sole custody and exclusive possession and I believe he'll be paying for everything since you aren't working. Don't rush to sell the home you benefit by staying in the home with the kids as long as possible. Its all pretty dirty and unethical but it should work.
He has no idea what is coming. You are going to get sole custody and exclusive possession and I believe he'll be paying for everything since you aren't working. Don't rush to sell the home you benefit by staying in the home with the kids as long as possible. Its all pretty dirty and unethical but it should work.
No one wins in a divorce, however, staying reasonable and doing things in a systematic way will help you with the steps.
The rest of the posters have provided excellent advice, you need immediate legal representation and legal aid might not be likely given that you own a home and thus have a substantial asset. I'd definitely check into it but I wouldn't let it hold up the process. I'd be looking for a lawyer that will work with you on paying once the house is sold.
As for the gf, ignore what you can and don't answer her phone calls, etc. However, keep records of everything in case you have a custody battle on your hands. If it escalates to anything you consider aggressive, get a restraining order.
You need to deal with the house situation. Currently, you're in a very gray zone because you haven't even filed yet. He technically can still come into the home...even remove items...and there's not a whole lot you can do about it legally.
Emergency motions have to meet certain criteria that I'm not sure you have...if you don't meet those criteria (ie, physical abuse, high financial hardship) you will have to file and wait for a CC to file a motion. That is not a quick process so you need to get started right away.
You're also going to need to start letting people know what's going on because you need a support system. You'll need emotional and maybe financial help to get through the next year or so....so start thinking about that. Nothing about getting through the process is quick or cheap. It a while to get a support order and then get it enforced but you can apply for retro CS once you get started.
Above all, keep your kids out of the conflict. Do not discuss the divorce with them. Stay positive about their father and visits with him...and do not demean him or his new gf in their presence. Whatever he does, do not descend to his level or involve the kids. You don't need to explain anything b.s. he says to them with your version of the story. Simply tell them that its an adult issue and that you're working on it with their father. Do a lot of reading on how to handle things with the kids during this process. It will help you manage their anxiety and stress through the transition.
Good luck!
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