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Old 12-13-2012, 11:20 AM
onlybeginning onlybeginning is offline
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Ex an I are seperated almost 1 year. I have an attorney, she HAD an attorney (legal aid) and was cut off so I believe she is "between" attorneys at the moment. We have had our first court appearance (case conf) back in September and got a few things in place. Her attorney was seeking mediation just before she was cutoff. My ex then approached me about mediation. So far we have had 2 mediation sessions for a total of 3 hours mediation and have basically gotten nowhere. My attorney has outlined to me where I stand on the issues. She was orig seeking sole custody. During case conf, the judge sent what I believe was a strong message indicating that she believes in some form of joint custody and although no decision has been made I do not believe she will get sole custody. On the financial side, she is going to owe me a large sum of either cash or pension, she is aware of this. I believe at this point she is delaying the outcome of these things and bargaining in bad faith in mediation to stall the process as long as she can. I am at this point deciding if mediation is still the way to go. The mediator has not said there is no point but I have to believe he has a vested interest in keeping the mediation process going to make his money. We are using Mediato the subsidized mediation.

I am wondering if it is better to continue in mediation (I know this is ideal if both parties are willing to move forward) and continue to hold out hope and if it is called off let her or the mediator make that decision, not sure how the decision to cease mediation will look in a judges eyes. My other option is to call it off and move forward with the courts. If I go this route do I then need to prioritize the outstanding issues and take them to court 1 by 1? I would likely start with the custody of the children and then proceed on the financials. I am also considering to self represent on these issues, I have paid my attorney enough. If I go this route what would be the first step in dealing with custody of the children? What would be the first step in dealing with the financials? The difference in the financials is her pension which I have an evaluation for.
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