My Babies have a WIN.....Love you IPP

[ConcernedDad71]

Not many talk success story's.

Trial was pending, I spoke to the Trial Co-ordinator and said that because I forced a immediate first appearance trial date, the ex found it difficult.....I presume.

I said to the trial co-ordinator that the respondent wishes to try and settle matters to avoid trial.

The co-ordinator was more than happy to do what was needed to get me on the next date to settle matters avoiding trial.

I tried to make sure all matters were agreed upon. I did give some but I stuck to the belief that what I am fighting for was for my babies.

We went in today, and I brought my Minutes of Settlement, and what I brought was questioned and picked apart by both Duty Council Lawyers even though we both agreed.

I took the advantage and found out for the first time in a year and a half that out Court offers "free" mediation, which no judge nor lawyer said was available....so taking this advantage, we agreed upon many aspects, which a few really hit hard on my ex for believing what she did.

The Mediator even said that Relocation is most often based upon the same neighbourhood or at most the next neighbourhood to maintain a stable lifestyle for child(ren). Even my 30km allowance could be questioned in the Judges eye to maintain this stability. It was the Judge I had for the past 2 years who didn't care either way that allowed my case to fall through the cracks.

More importantly, I emplore everyone to seek this mediation while in litigation. If you can afford mediation, go for it but do the homework on them, I was lucky because the woman I saw has been doing this for children for 30 years and loved the judge as a friend whome I was saying was about to take my Trial case...she said he was "just" and nice and always for the "children" first.

I love all whome helped me here. I have one last fight left. I need to file to the Law Society of Upper Canada because the Lawyer I hired was an ass and put me further behind than on my own. He is and ass and in the end, it took "truth" and my wife to win me my case.

IT TOOK CONCERNEDSTEPMOM78 TO WIN MY CASE. NOBODY COULD HAVE DONE IT MORE WONDERFUL THAN HER. ANYONE WHO SAID DIFFERENT IS A LOSER OR SOMEONE WHO IS FAILING.....SHE WON ME MY BABIES. THANK YOU CONCERNEDSTEPMOM78......

To anyoene saying anything negative to Stepmom78, owes her my life for my two children. Everything she did was all I needed......all the way.

I love all the help everyone helped me in here with.

I am more than pissed off at the "shit" anyone here spoke, they had "no" facts and vented their own garbage toward my own need, that is where this forum failed. Give up your hatred and losses and help, stop pretending to be lawyers when you are a losing nobody....like me.

Just ask for help, give advice where needed and shut the heck up when you wish vent your garbage.....you did more damange to me than you could ever know.

Mediators.....LV....fire yourself, you are a pompus person who I thought was there to help but you did more damage than anyone here and I will voice this. ConcernedMom78 is NOT anyone else but her, if you felt she had an alt, you need to remove yourself from your own alts and stop casting your own guilt on others....I divorced my wife who had too many alts and lovers.....

IPP You are this formum's GODDESS.....I love you for always. Everyone needs you.

[dadtotheend]

IT TOOK CONCERNEDSTEPMOM78 TO WIN MY CASE. NOBODY COULD HAVE DONE IT MORE WONDERFUL THAN HER. ANYONE WHO SAID DIFFERENT IS A LOSER OR SOMEONE WHO IS FAILING.....SHE WON ME MY BABIES. THANK YOU CONCERNEDSTEPMOM78......

To anyoene saying anything negative to Stepmom78, owes her my life for my two children. Everything she did was all I needed......all the way.

I am more than pissed off at the "shit" anyone here spoke, they had "no" facts and vented their own garbage toward my own need, that is where this forum failed. Give up your hatred and losses and help, stop pretending to be lawyers when you are a losing nobody....like me.

Just ask for help, give advice where needed and shut the heck up when you wish vent your garbage.....you did more damange to me than you could ever know.

Mediators.....LV....fire yourself, you are a pompus person who I thought was there to help but you did more damage than anyone here and I will voice this. ConcernedMom78 is NOT anyone else but her, if you felt she had an alt, you need to remove yourself from your own alts and stop casting your own guilt on others....I divorced my wife who had too many alts and lovers.....

Fuck you very much for that mixed message.

Good for you for settling. Good thing your wife, the mediator, you and one of us here are your guardian angels.

Too bad the judge, your lawyer, your ex and most of us here are assholes. Sometimes the truth hurts dickhead. Guess it's all just a little too tender for you to understand that though so you lash out at everyone who doesn't agree with everything you say, or God forbid they disagree with ConcernedStepMom. At least you are a fine protector.

As for LV firing himself, instead him doing that why don't you make good on statements repeatedly made by both you and your wife to get the Hell out of here? You've become a cancer here.

And good luck with the Law Society sucker. It didn't take you long to transition over to another cross for both of you to bear did it?

Maybe there's another forum for you and your wife to jump into and infect with your obsessive all minutes of the day post after post after post after post. Do you two actually get any work done in your jobs when you get up on your respective high horses?

We're supposed to have a huge snow storm here in Toronto today, but I can't wait for the shit storm you just created with that latest whack job post you made.

Have at 'er fellow assholes. It's open season again.

[ConcernedDad71]

Fuck you very much for that mixed message.

Good for you for settling. Good thing your wife, the mediator, you and one of us here are your guardian angels.

Too bad the judge, your lawyer, your ex and most of us here are assholes. Sometimes the truth hurts dickhead. Guess it's all just a little too tender for you to understand that though so you lash out at everyone who doesn't agree with everything you say, or God forbid they disagree with ConcernedStepMom. At least you are a fine protector.

As for LV firing himself, instead him doing that why don't you make good on statements repeatedly made by both you and your wife to get the Hell out of here? You've become a cancer here.

And good luck with the Law Society sucker. It didn't take you long to transition over to another cross for both of you to bear did it?

Maybe there's another forum for you and your wife to jump into and infect with your obsessive all minutes of the day post after post after post after post. Do you two actually get any work done in your jobs when you get up on your respective high horses?

We're supposed to have a huge snow storm here in Toronto today, but I can't wait for the shit storm you just created with that latest whack job post you made.

Have at 'er fellow assholes. It's open season again.

Set down the mirror yet?

[dadtotheend]

Whatever crybaby. I see both of you are online prowling around this thread as I write, no doubt ready to immerse yourselves in another round of obsessive posting. You two are real pieces of work.

[BitHunter]

I can't even understand.

[About_Time]

My personal experiences on this site have been almost universally positive and helpful. People here usually bend over backwards to help others - particularly LV. I don't know about your particular beefs but I've found that, in general, the people who get mad do so not because people failed to help, but rather that they gave them answers and advice they didn't want to hear.

Again though, I don't know your particular situation. I do know that ruining a perfectly good positive update by ragging on people is fairly classless and completely uneccessary. If I can be civil to my ex, I can't imagine being uncivil to people trying to help others for free.

[ConcernenedStepMom78]

First off I get to defend myself in this. Yes CD is very protective of his family. The court system is enough to drive anyone to madness with its backward setup, that facilitates families arguing, animosity, and financial ruin for the average individuals, seperating and divorcing.

Whether anybody agreed or disagreed with us is not the main point. We told many of you that the questions we asked were not because that was how we were going to compose ourselves in court, but rather to present scenarios in which to assist us. CD and I are not who or what we may seem to be in a forum vs in person, and it was hurtful a that many of you thought that I would lose CD his case.

This case was NOT about CD or his ex winning, because in the cases that go to trial EVERYBODY loses!!! and more importantly the Children lose. CD did not win...I did not win, his ex did not win...The Kids won!!!

Over the last month I spent a lot of time trying to silently mediate for CD and his ex, ready to pull my hair out and feeling like i was bi-polar because of the emotional roller coaster it all put me into, only to come in here and feel attacked for presenting different scenarios.

Yes there are many that did help, and I also sought help through someone who did not know as much as you guys about our case. She helped me realize some things that I hope you can all think about.

As individuals we tend to perceive things differently, and what we perceive may or may not be the reality. If I say "The sky is blue and it is sunny" someone may like that comment while someone else may feel it is an insult, and somone else may jerk a tear over it. We all must be extremely careful, especially considering that most people in here are in an emotionally heightened state and desperate for help and answers, when all else fails.

If you try to approach a wounded animal in the woods, whether you are trying to help or not you run the risk of being attacked, so you must approach with caution and assess the situation logically.

Now, I learned a great deal from many of you, some positive, some negative, and my desire to continue my education and Fight for Children has grown even stronger since being in this forum.

I leave you with this thought.....

Every Day is New Day and if we wish to move forward and we wish to be good parents it is essential that we wipe the slate clean each and every day!

[dadtotheend]

I don't know about your particular beefs but I've found that, in general, the people who get mad do so not because people failed to help, but rather that they gave them answers and advice they didn't want to hear.

You hit the nail squarely on the head there. These two unappreciative and sorry sods are exactly that.

[ConcernenedStepMom78]

the people who get mad do so not because people failed to help, but rather that they gave them answers and advice they didn't want to hear.You hit the nail squarely on the head there.

These two unappreciative and sorry sods are exactly that.<!-- / message -->

Nowhere did either of us say we were unappreciative, to those that DID help. And it was not a matter of hearing what we did not want to hear, but rather attacks, that made us feel like crawling into a hole, in a very difficult time for us and our children. There are some, a select handful in here, that are extremely helpful, understanding, and patient. If you are not guilty then there is no reason you should feel the need to defend yourself.

[blinkandimgone]

Good news for the children, too bad your attitude sucks so much.

[About_Time]

If you are not guilty then there is no reason you should feel the need to defend yourself.

30 minutes earlier...

First off I get to defend myself in this.

Not trying to stir anything up here, but that was too good not to mention.

[ConcernenedStepMom78]

There is difference in defending yourself when you are being attacked and have not said a word....and defending yourself because you are guilty of something.

CD defended me of his own accord and then there were people that attacked me when I had not said a single word in this particular thread.

Was I to sit silently while everyone rushed in and attacked me, because someone else defended my honour?

[ConcernenedStepMom78]

I do find it curious that nobody made a comment on my post, but human behaviour is quite predictable, nobody says anything about the positive things , they feed and fuel off the negative.

Bad things is what makes news, and they throw in a few human interest stories periodically to make us feel good. I love my psychology classes.

[About_Time]

There is difference in defending yourself when you are being attacked and have not said a word....and defending yourself because you are guilty of something.

There CAN be a difference, but both situations can also be true. I could criticize my ex-wife out of the blue and when she defended herself she would be doing so both because she was attacked AND because she was guilty. Also, defending himself no more proves dadtotheend is guilty of anything than you defending yourself proves yours. Defending oneself from criticism has no direct correlation with guilt.

CD defended me of his own accord and then there were people that attacked me when I had not said a single word in this particular thread.

I agree that spontaneous attacks - though the bread and butter of the internet - are bad form.

Was I to sit silently while everyone rushed in and attacked me, because someone else defended my honour?

Yeah, pretty much. If anyone in this thread would like to complain about me and call me hurtful names, feel free. As much as I value the information and assistance I get from this board at the end of the day, you are all strangers on the internet. Your opinions have no impact on my life. My self-esteem is sufficiently inflated to defend against random slander from total strangers on a message board.

[ConcernenedStepMom78]

Well what I said was more about allowing the people in the forum to maybe have a different outlook on things, a small portion was defending myself and CD, but more of what I posted was bout how some people can feel in here, and that things are not lways what they seem.

CD and I have been through a lot, and that is NOT saying anyone and everyone here has not, eveyone has their own story, and their own path to walk, that is for them and them alone, and NO one person can fix it for them or make it right, we can offer advice along the way that may aor may not help, but just to be open minded that we are all hurting.