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  • Did not drop kids off

    I am curious what my rights really are in this situation.
    There is no court order but for years I have been getting the kids every weekend. She does not have a car because of an at fault car accident and moved 20 km away to her parents place. Since she moved in with her parents the kids have had new bruises each week and once hair pulled out. I have told children services 2 months ago but they have done nothing as of yet. There is other issues as well

    The kids did not want to go back, and I don't believe it is good for them there. So I decided to keep them. This was on last Sunday, and have not heard from their mom since. I have let the children service worker know of my decision on Monday but still have not recieved any reply


    What should my next step be? Could I request the Child tax benefit?

    Sent from my Pixel 3a XL using Tapatalk

  • #2
    You need to walk before you run. If you have no agreement or order you need to get one. Keeping your kids unilaterally is not a great idea and it could come back and bite you in the ass. Before you go and apply for any benefits you should go through the process. Your ex can argue that she had custody and you failed to follow it.

    Comment


    • #3
      You have just unilaterally changed a custody situation that has been in place for years with no justification or court order, and your biggest concern at the moment is...

      ...child tax benefit?

      You are going to spend the next two decades worth of child tax benefits on lawyers once your ex starts the litigation over this. And that is if you are lucky.

      Comment


      • #4
        You likely will be deemed to have a custody arrangement by virtue of conduct and are now breaching that arrangement unilaterally.
        Also, it appears you have always provided transportation (drop off and pick up) so again you may be seen to have agreed by conduct.
        Is there any history of the mother filing motions? Is she represented? Are you anticipating a court filing seeking a custody and access order?
        You seem to have an arrangement to pay support so what is that based on?
        And who do you not have something in writing yet? Get it.
        Maybe she does not want custody or access. Find out.
        CRA will demand a written order or agreement. How did she become the beneficiary? You must have submitted something to prove access giving her the benefits.
        Something does not add up here.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by Abba435 View Post
          Something does not add up here.
          It never does.

          Comment


          • #6
            You will have very negative repurcussions for unilaterally restricting access to the other parent. Possible motion, lost of custody, and certain costs. Imagine how you would feel if other parent did this to you?

            And you are concerned about CCB?? Restore access immediately. Promote the relationship with the other parent. Teaching opportunity for kids if they say they don’t want to go. Guess what? Most kids say they don’t want to go to school either....do you give in?
            Last edited by LovingDad1234; 03-28-2020, 08:29 AM.

            Comment


            • #7
              I should have added more information at one point on Sunday she said not to drop the kids off and keep them. But then acted like she never said anything Also the kids do not even have beds at their place at moms.

              There is not court order or any custody agreement We have never had a court date. and there is no written agreement

              My child support I pay is from a verbal agreement

              She has never got an agreement from me or an order as far as I know to be the kids beneficiary for her to get the Child tax benefits.

              Another question since there is no agreement am I entitled to having a copy of their birth certificate

              She has recently been saying she would want the kids back. By the earlier posts I reckon that's a good idea.

              I am planning to fight for full custody, I have started with the paper work but with the COVID 19 situation I have stalled.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by walhalla View Post
                I should have added more information at one point on Sunday she said not to drop the kids off and keep them. But then acted like she never said anything Also the kids do not even have beds at their place at moms.

                There is not court order or any custody agreement We have never had a court date. and there is no written agreement

                My child support I pay is from a verbal agreement

                She has never got an agreement from me or an order as far as I know to be the kids beneficiary for her to get the Child tax benefits.

                Another question since there is no agreement am I entitled to having a copy of their birth certificate

                She has recently been saying she would want the kids back. By the earlier posts I reckon that's a good idea.

                I am planning to fight for full custody, I have started with the paper work but with the COVID 19 situation I have stalled.
                Find a separation agreement template.
                Fill it in at least for the basics.
                Both parents get independent legal advice.
                Sign it.
                File it with the court.
                You need a lawyer

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Abba435 View Post
                  Find a separation agreement template.
                  Fill it in at least for the basics.
                  Both parents get independent legal advice.
                  Sign it.
                  File it with the court.
                  You need a lawyer
                  I have tried this several times, she always declines, I have set up mediation and the mediator refused to deal with her after her first appointment. I have emailed her a seperation agreement/parenting plan for her to go over and change what she did not agree with and she refused to do it.


                  Sent from my Pixel 3a XL using Tapatalk

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by walhalla View Post
                    I have tried this several times, she always declines, I have set up mediation and the mediator refused to deal with her after her first appointment. I have emailed her a seperation agreement/parenting plan for her to go over and change what she did not agree with and she refused to do it.


                    Sent from my Pixel 3a XL using Tapatalk
                    then take it to the next level.

                    You brought up the kids have no beds at her place. What do they sleep on?

                    Cannot see you getting sole custody but if you want to try for it you better make sure that you have been paying table support all along for the kids.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      If you cannot afford a lawyer get legal aid.
                      If you can get one.
                      Or file the paperwork yourself.
                      The kids need the grown ups to get their affairs in order.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        They sleep on the ground at her place, they don't even have bedrooms. I talked to her social worker and she does not believe it's an issue. She also said since there is no order I do not have to return them

                        I don't really have money for a lawyer and was making too much for legal aid, I recently got laid off because of COVID19, would I be able to get legal aid while I'm getting EI?

                        Sent from my Pixel 3a XL using Tapatalk

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Maybe, only Legal Aid can answer this question.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by walhalla View Post
                            They sleep on the ground at her place, they don't even have bedrooms. I talked to her social worker and she does not believe it's an issue. She also said since there is no order I do not have to return them

                            I don't really have money for a lawyer and was making too much for legal aid, I recently got laid off because of COVID19, would I be able to get legal aid while I'm getting EI?

                            Sent from my Pixel 3a XL using Tapatalk
                            The social worker is not qualified to give you advice about returning the kids. To me that is giving legal advice. There may not be an order but there is a status quo.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Social worker has no expertise.
                              Find a competent lawyer.

                              Comment

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