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  • #16
    No my ex tells me I am a deadbeat.

    Yes he enjoys hockey but it really is impossible for me with my career to commit to it. I quite consistently work 6 days a week 10+ hours. My work tries to give me Saturdays and Sundays off for the kids but driving hours on end the only time I get to see my kids does not sound like enjoyable quality time with the other 3 children.

    I offered to take him once on my weekend cause he played an hour from my residence but they said no they will pick him up and bring him back to me. That ended up in him not going at all because I said if I couldn't take him then he won't be going as it was my access weekend. With that said most all of his games are 3-4 hour drive one way from my residence and it's both Sat and Sundays. Honestly with the support I pay and ortho I don't have much left to put out in all the travel myself.

    I tried to muddle through your posts (on my phone). Think I'll get on the computer later to have a better look.

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    • #17
      My partners ex decides what activities the kids should be in, tells my partner nothing and then tells him he has to pay.

      Now in her court filing shes claiming he refuses s7 expenses, is a deadbeat and therefore she should have absolute control over all decisions without his input.

      Unreasonable people will always exist, hopefully your kids see through this and still choose to have a relationship with you. Hold strong!!

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      • #18
        Originally posted by Tandem80 View Post
        No my ex tells me I am a deadbeat.
        LOL. Don't worry about what she says. nobody cares. I sure don't. What she tells you says more about her then it does about you.

        Originally posted by Tandem80 View Post
        Yes he enjoys hockey but it really is impossible for me with my career to commit to it. I quite consistently work 6 days a week 10+ hours. My work tries to give me Saturdays and Sundays off for the kids but driving hours on end the only time I get to see my kids does not sound like enjoyable quality time with the other 3 children.

        I offered to take him once on my weekend cause he played an hour from my residence but they said no they will pick him up and bring him back to me. That ended up in him not going at all because I said if I couldn't take him then he won't be going as it was my access weekend. With that said most all of his games are 3-4 hour drive one way from my residence and it's both Sat and Sundays. Honestly with the support I pay and ortho I don't have much left to put out in all the travel myself.
        Lol don't give up your time to them. It's your parenting time do whatever hell you want.

        but I fear they are trying to paint visits with you as boring..since the kids don't get to go to hockey on your time

        You have to find a way to make weekends with you more fun than hockey weekends with them.

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        • #19
          Wow! Sounds like my situation. She says I refuse section 7 as well and wants court to change the agreement that she doesn't need my consent either.

          Funny thing is I have emails of her whining about me not paying for this and that so I asked for costs and receipts and she tells me her lawyer has them. What good is that?

          Hmmm, ok so I don't even get a chance to contribute to those because I say no to hockey. This is alllll over hockey and the only sport I ever hear of.

          Guess providing health benefits for the kids, glasses and braces don't count as contributions to S7!

          It's funny how she sees section 7 as sports only. Doesn't see the big picture of getting $24,000 in support per year and 88% of the costs of the total ortho bill of $26/27,000 as me contributing and I am just a deadbeat that fights her with everything:smh:

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          • #20
            Originally posted by rockscan View Post
            Now in her court filing shes claiming he refuses s7 expenses, is a deadbeat and therefore she should have absolute control over all decisions without his input.
            Well that's lame. It actually shows she's intentionally creating conflict to oppose joint custody.

            In the Lewis case, I expressed my views as to the advantages of a joint custody order. One of the common complaints of the access parent in a sole custody regime is that the custodial parent will announce at the last minute that a particular access visit conflicts with other plans made for the child, such as a family visit or a sport activity, and unilaterally decide that the access parent must accept another time “to visit” under the threat of not seeing the child at all.

            I cannot agree with the suggestion that a sole custody order which entrusts all legal decision making in the hands of one parent will necessarily minimize the conflict between them. Parents who declare war on one another will continue to battle whatever order the court makes.

            This is not to suggest that there may not be conflicting legal duties and responsibilities in a joint custody regime that will have to be resolved occasionally by the courts. In my experience, these problems are far outweighed by the frequent applications that are made to the court in those instances where sole custody has been granted. Joint custody orders are more apt to encourage the parents to co-operate than sole custody orders. The philosophy that joint custody orders can and should only be made whenever the parties are prepared to co-operate fully in every aspect of child rearing only encourages parents to refuse to co-operate so that they can pursue a sole custody order.

            looking for case law that one parent cant intentionally create conflict by witholing their cooperation
            Last edited by trinton; 05-23-2017, 09:02 PM.

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            • #21
              Meanwhile she doesn't work...at all. Has all the time in the world to spend with the kids.

              I also have joint custody but I'm sure she would love to change that. She is the one that moved away. Otherwise I would have fought tooth and nail for 50/50.

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              • #22
                I feel bad for your child even though I totally understand where you are coming from (and feel bad for you as well). Your child likely feels a strain between pleasing both sides. Also, depending on the level he's playing at, the coaches may not be too keen on him missing so much. How old is your son? Old enough to reason with his mom and stepdad about it? I think you are right that inevitably he will choose the games/social part unless he redirects to a new sport. But it doesn't sound like that will happen. Is it house league? If so, I don't think you owe a dime more than what you pay in child support already. My son is in house league hockey and I assume the cost of all the sports.


                Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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                • #23
                  It's minor hockey? Travel within the province. Usually 1-3 hours from her residence.

                  We had an agreement to keep it at pond hockey...they took it to the next level 2yrs in a row without my knowledge or consent. This is all their doing.

                  I feel bad too for him. But this could have all be avoided in the first place.

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                  • #24
                    Originally posted by Tandem80 View Post
                    Wow! Sounds like my situation. She says I refuse section 7 as well and wants court to change the agreement that she doesn't need my consent either.

                    Funny thing is I have emails of her whining about me not paying for this and that so I asked for costs and receipts and she tells me her lawyer has them. What good is that?

                    Hmmm, ok so I don't even get a chance to contribute to those because I say no to hockey. This is alllll over hockey and the only sport I ever hear of.

                    Guess providing health benefits for the kids, glasses and braces don't count as contributions to S7!

                    It's funny how she sees section 7 as sports only. Doesn't see the big picture of getting $24,000 in support per year and 88% of the costs of the total ortho bill of $26/27,000 as me contributing and I am just a deadbeat that fights her with everything:smh:


                    My fave was her claim that he has denied s7 expenses. He hasn't been given any. You cant deny something you aren't told!

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                    • #25
                      Exactly I have seen one receipt for any sport in the last 4 yrs. Other than hockey last year. The year prior I was told she wasn't asking for contribution just wanted him to play. Now that he is involved she wants me to contribute. And in not doing so I am disagreeing to all section 7! I asked in a email last fall for all the kids sports receipts and didn't even get and acknowledgement.

                      Would like to here how this pans out for your husband.

                      I've private messaged another fellow off here sound like we have twin situations (kinda eerie) maybe he can provide some feedback for me as well.

                      Comment

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