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  • #16
    .....Based on 1 side of the story, how can you come to a conclusion like this? I wouldn't want you as a Judge

    Originally posted by trinton View Post
    That's just awful. He ended things so I support your position of spousal support.


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    • #17
      Originally posted by hopefull View Post
      .....Based on 1 side of the story, how can you come to a conclusion like this? I wouldn't want you as a Judge


      You let me know when you have the other side of the story. I came to a conclusion based on the mere statement that the divorce was granted on grounds of adultery.


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      • #18
        Well, I have followed Arabian's situation for some time

        But if at least several judges are agreeing with Arabian (the original judge and several thereafter) ....and Arabian's story has veracity and authenticity to me, those cumulative things lead me to my conclusion.

        You can draw your own conclusion, just as I am entitled to mine.

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        • #19
          This is hardly a victory, it was another day in the life of family law.... an older women is getting alimony for life and her ex-husband has to work for like an indentured slave because apparently marriage isn't really a partnership, it is the woman that is sacrificing more.....

          I could never express how happy I am have to been divorced young. 4 years of alimony and I am better off today than I was than when I got divorced and I have a whole life ahead of me.

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          • #20
            Originally posted by Links17 View Post

            I could never express how happy I am have to been divorced young. 4 years of alimony and I am better off today than I was than when I got divorced and I have a whole life ahead of me.


            Same. I always get congratulated when I mention I'm divorced. Congratulations on getting married and divorced so early. Enjoy your life.



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            • #21
              Originally posted by arabian View Post
              Thanks to many of your who have been so supportive of me through the years. While I know SS is a heavy burden and objected to by many I appreciate those active readers who are able to differentiate my situation from those who are clearly not entitled to SS.

              For those who don't know about my situation, I was married for 30 years and financially ripped off by ex (business) by way of his hiding money under his g/f & family members (in a nutshell).

              I would have much preferred to have been able to pursue my ex for financial misdeeds through the criminal court, however, this was not possible as we were going through divorce at the time. The fact that we were in the middle of a divorce actually protected my ex from charges of fraud over 5,000. It's a crazy system. Having to deal with family court (for fraud from my former business partner (ex-husband) has meant dragging out my receipt of restitution for decades.... I doubt he will ever live long enough to pay me what he owes me. I therefore emphasize that SS has been a vehicle for me to try to recoup some of my losses... nothing more. BTW I had the benefit of experienced family, corporate and criminal lawyers throughout this whole thing.

              Will my ex take away the "pen" and rein in his g/f in the future to stop this nonsense? Not likely. When someone has focused their reason to exist on making someone else's life miserable it is hard to direct them to another focus in life. It is for this reason only that I hope my ex sees the daylight and finds himself another mate and lives out the rest of his life in peace. Surely we both deserve this?
              Very well said arabian, I'm happy to hear that you were able to represent yourself and win.

              Best Regards

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              • #22
                Yet this is the internet and anybody can say anything.....until you hear the other person's side of the story, you can't really jump to conclusions.

                Originally posted by lancelot View Post
                But if at least several judges are agreeing with Arabian (the original judge and several thereafter) ....and Arabian's story has veracity and authenticity to me, those cumulative things lead me to my conclusion.

                You can draw your own conclusion, just as I am entitled to mine.

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                • #23
                  Congratulations Arabian. You should be proud of yourself.
                  You are a strong, independent woman and deserve better than being dragged through this constantly.

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                  • #24
                    Dictionary meaning of INDEPENDENT = Not needing help from anyone / ability to do things on your own/ standing on your own 2 feet

                    SS = being independent? Just curious and not asking in reference to this particular thread matter

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                    • #25
                      +1 - the lie of independence...

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                      • #26
                        Originally posted by hopefull View Post
                        Dictionary meaning of INDEPENDENT = Not needing help from anyone / ability to do things on your own/ standing on your own 2 feet

                        SS = being independent? Just curious and not asking in reference to this particular thread matter
                        She was likely dependent when they were married and it would be difficult for her to all of a sudden become independent.

                        Spousal support shouldn't be long term, the recipient should be finding ways to become independent and move on.

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                        • #27
                          Arabian has never said she wasnt independent. From what I understand she is very independent, works, has a life and is happier now that shes divorced from that pile of garbage. Her spousal support is payment for the money she had invested in their business. Her ex drove their business into the ground and hid all their assets. She deserves that money back and the only way to get it was to do so via ss.

                          You can complain all you want about ss in your cases but I give kudos to Arabian for winning and getting a chance to get her money back. Her case is in no way comparable to your ex's who got paid for screwing those of you who complain.

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                          • #28
                            I am NOT paying SS as my ex is "independent".

                            @PeacefullMoments above is the one that threw in the word "independent", and I can't see how that could be the case if you had two people regardless of gender where 1 is working to fend for themselves and the other is getting paid monthly for having been in a relationship

                            Originally posted by rockscan View Post
                            Arabian has never said she wasnt independent. From what I understand she is very independent, works, has a life and is happier now that shes divorced from that pile of garbage. Her spousal support is payment for the money she had invested in their business. Her ex drove their business into the ground and hid all their assets. She deserves that money back and the only way to get it was to do so via ss.

                            You can complain all you want about ss in your cases but I give kudos to Arabian for winning and getting a chance to get her money back. Her case is in no way comparable to your ex's who got paid for screwing those of you who complain.

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                            • #29
                              Shes being paid her equalization from the marriage and business monthly. Its not traditional SS. It is almost similar to being paid by FRO. If she won the award and it was paid monthly through a maintenance agency it would be the same as the monthly payments she gets now.

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                              • #30
                                I have a chuckle at some of the remarks on here.... speculation.

                                First thing I think of is the hundreds of thousands of dollars I put into the business. My situation is likely too complicated for many, in their very limited family court and life experiences, to comprehend. That's ok.

                                Had I not been a large contributor (and full incorporated partner) of our family business I would still be entitled to indefinite SS. Some may not like SS. Others do not like CS. Liking something is irrelevant. They are part of the laws of our country.

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