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  • Need some advice

    I got a phone call from the bank today. My stbx is not paying the vehicle payment for the vehicle she has possession of, and my name is on the loan as well. The bank stated that they were going to repo it if the balance was not brought up to date. She also hasn't been paying her share of the secured line of credit /sigh. I can cover the line of credit but the outstanding amount on the vehicle loan is too much for me.

    I have an appointment with the bank tomorrow to see what can be worked out. I obviously can't just go and take the vehicle, but what can I do to protect myself if it does get repo'd? There is equity in it because I put a large down payment on it. I emailed her a few months ago, telling her to sell it because she wouldn't be able to afford it but she didn't heed my warnings.

    The other problem is that we live 10 mins outside of the city and there is no buses that come out here, so if she loses her vehicle, she won't be able to go to work. We have 50/50 right now, can she move the kids into the city stating she has no vehicle to get them to school where we live now? Also, if she doesn't go to work because she doesn't have a vehicle, would a judge impute her wage?

    I also have an appointment with a lawyer in 2 days. I am self repping because I can't afford to retain, but I am looking for advice on how to proceed with a motion to sell the matrimonial home which she currently resides in. The basis of my argument is that she obviously cannot afford the house, she is not currently paying her share of the line of credit which is attached to the house. And my name is on the mortgage as well, if she loses the house like she is losing the vehicle, I am going to be pulled down with her.

    I vacated the house on July 1st and she has been living there since. We don't have a written agreement, but we have been sharing 50/50 custody. I left the home as part of a settlement which never got signed by her. I also couldn't stay because it would be dangerous for me (she had already falsely accused me of assault, and child abuse) She was out of the house from Feb to July as a condition of her release (she was arrested for assaulting me, which is another reason I had to leave, her charges were withdrawn and she made it clear that she was moving back into the home as soon as that happened)

    What does a judge look at when determining if the house needs to be sold? It is where the kids lived while we were married. They now split their time between there and my place (which is 2 minutes away) What evidence should I gather or what argument should I make to sell the house? Or at least have her buy me out. Right now she won't give me her share of the debt payments, she won't give me her share of section 7, she isn't paying the vehicle loan.

    On another note. She was off work for a couple of years on disability (long story, so I won't elaborate) When she went back to work, she gave me 4 paystubs and I averaged what her yearly income would be had she worked the whole year. I pay cs according to the schedule, based on that number (that included a week of unpaid holidays which would make her average yearly income low)
    Is that a fair way to calculate cs? I know everyone says line 150 but I read somewhere that 3 paystubs could be used to calculate a fair amount if there was a material change of circumstance (like going back to work from not working)

    Thank you for your time

  • #2
    Originally posted by mr.mom View Post
    I got a phone call from the bank today. My stbx is not paying the vehicle payment for the vehicle she has possession of, and my name is on the loan as well. The bank stated that they were going to repo it if the balance was not brought up to date. She also hasn't been paying her share of the secured line of credit /sigh. I can cover the line of credit but the outstanding amount on the vehicle loan is too much for me.

    I have an appointment with the bank tomorrow to see what can be worked out. I obviously can't just go and take the vehicle, but what can I do to protect myself if it does get repo'd? There is equity in it because I put a large down payment on it. I emailed her a few months ago, telling her to sell it because she wouldn't be able to afford it but she didn't heed my warnings.

    The other problem is that we live 10 mins outside of the city and there is no buses that come out here, so if she loses her vehicle, she won't be able to go to work. We have 50/50 right now, can she move the kids into the city stating she has no vehicle to get them to school where we live now? Also, if she doesn't go to work because she doesn't have a vehicle, would a judge impute her wage?

    I also have an appointment with a lawyer in 2 days. I am self repping because I can't afford to retain, but I am looking for advice on how to proceed with a motion to sell the matrimonial home which she currently resides in. The basis of my argument is that she obviously cannot afford the house, she is not currently paying her share of the line of credit which is attached to the house. And my name is on the mortgage as well, if she loses the house like she is losing the vehicle, I am going to be pulled down with her.

    I vacated the house on July 1st and she has been living there since. We don't have a written agreement, but we have been sharing 50/50 custody. I left the home as part of a settlement which never got signed by her. I also couldn't stay because it would be dangerous for me (she had already falsely accused me of assault, and child abuse) She was out of the house from Feb to July as a condition of her release (she was arrested for assaulting me, which is another reason I had to leave, her charges were withdrawn and she made it clear that she was moving back into the home as soon as that happened)

    What does a judge look at when determining if the house needs to be sold? It is where the kids lived while we were married. They now split their time between there and my place (which is 2 minutes away) What evidence should I gather or what argument should I make to sell the house? Or at least have her buy me out. Right now she won't give me her share of the debt payments, she won't give me her share of section 7, she isn't paying the vehicle loan.

    On another note. She was off work for a couple of years on disability (long story, so I won't elaborate) When she went back to work, she gave me 4 paystubs and I averaged what her yearly income would be had she worked the whole year. I pay cs according to the schedule, based on that number (that included a week of unpaid holidays which would make her average yearly income low)
    Is that a fair way to calculate cs? I know everyone says line 150 but I read somewhere that 3 paystubs could be used to calculate a fair amount if there was a material change of circumstance (like going back to work from not working)

    Thank you for your time
    The guidelines state that you should use the most recent information available so using her paystubs is definitely fair.

    Comment


    • #3
      You done screwed up son. You violated a cardinal rule of family law...NEVER leave the house without a signed agreement.

      There are ways you can protect yourself from false DV allegations.

      Now that she has the car, the house and YOU gone...what incentive does she have to work with you?

      You NEED a lawyer...

      1. To force her to refinance the vehicle into her own name and remove you from the loan...OR to sell it for an amount at least equal to the amount owing.

      2. To force the sale or refinancing of the mat. home. Have you checked to see if she is paying the mortgage?

      3. Did you freeze the line of credit? or did you leave that open? Pay the interest only on it until the home is sold. Or interest + $1.

      If the car gets repo'd and she can't work and has to move...perhaps you could assume ownership of the matrimonial home, AND primary custody of the children? (If she was out of the house already, why in the WORLD would you leave without a binding agreement in place...)

      Edit: Barring being able to afford a lawyer...move back in to the mat. home. Nothing should kick start her ass into working with you like showing up on her doorstep and stating "Honey I'm HOME"

      Comment


      • #4
        Yeah I realize that now. It was my lawyer that told me to find a place to live. I guess she should have told me to hold off until the minutes of settlement was actually signed.

        Do I really need a lawyer? Can I bring a motion myself? I will be speaking with a lawyer in 2 days for advice. Is it that complicated?

        She is paying the mortgage so far. And the line of credit is frozen.

        Can I legally move back into the mat. home after I vacated it? Can my gf live with me lol. Actually I couldn't do that to my kids. Before she was removed, things were NASTY. I would rather go bankrupt than put my kids through that again.

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by mr.mom View Post
          Can I legally move back into the mat. home after I vacated it? Can my gf live with me lol. Actually I couldn't do that to my kids. Before she was removed, things were NASTY. I would rather go bankrupt than put my kids through that again.

          Hells YES! You own the home - you can move back in any time unless there is a court order stating you can't. My partner's ex did exactly that. She was gone for 6 months then just announced one day that she was coming back. He couldn't do anything about it.

          Comment


          • #6
            Yes, just go bankrupt. Where's the 'eyes rolling' symbol? You can rest assured though, it's about as easy as ordering fast food from the drive-thru window.

            I'll assume you were kidding. Bankruptcy should be a very last resort.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by hadenough View Post
              Yes, just go bankrupt. Where's the 'eyes rolling' symbol? You can rest assured though, it's about as easy as ordering fast food from the drive-thru window.

              I'll assume you were kidding. Bankruptcy should be a very last resort.
              100% sure that statement was used for effect, however, keep in mind that if you were to go bankrupt and she is left with the joint debt, that can be used against you in a claim for spousal support.

              Comment


              • #8
                ^ you betcha and will be arguing that point exactly when I file to have SS continued and possibly raised. Anyway, no need to go off topic. OP sez she's paying the mortgage - that's a big plus. I doubt he'll be moving back in. It does sound as though it would be a disaster.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by slughead10 View Post
                  now thats a gold digger ex is bankrupt so i want more support....lol
                  If you got lumped with a huge debt wouldn't you want to be compensated somehow? Your ex is now debt free and you have this huge burden. Sounds understandable to me.
                  Last edited by HappyMomma; 01-10-2013, 11:29 AM.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Go F yourself Slug. Ohhh I forgot - that's what you already do best Have a great day.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by slughead10 View Post
                      spoken with a true sense of entitlement.......
                      Um. No. In my case I'm the one who declared bankruptcy and my ex is coming after me for spousal. Yet I still see validity in the argument.

                      Foot, mouth, insert.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        As usual, the Resident Slug makes no meaningful contribution to the thread. Just slithers on in even when no one is talking to him.

                        CSAngel, I appreciate what you have posted. You obviously know what you're talking about, unlike a few here that talk out of their butts. *coughslugcough*

                        Slug, OMG I'm falling over laughing, you are so utterly and hopelessly ignorant and your spelling is atrocious. Go back to school for the love of God, will ya?

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          well I have a question. If I went bankrupt (I wouldn't just arbitrarily do this, though the finance manager at the bank I just had a meeting with asked me if I considered this lol) My spouse could ask for more SS right? Of course, she's is tabled with more debt, I make more money. What happens if SHE goes bankrupt? Can I ask for SS? I make more money than her but I would be the one tabled with all the debt?

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by mr.mom View Post
                            well I have a question. If I went bankrupt (I wouldn't just arbitrarily do this, though the finance manager at the bank I just had a meeting with asked me if I considered this lol) My spouse could ask for more SS right? Of course, she's is tabled with more debt, I make more money. What happens if SHE goes bankrupt? Can I ask for SS? I make more money than her but I would be the one tabled with all the debt?
                            I don't believe you are eligible for SS because you have debt, however, if you were eligible, then the amount you receive would take into consideration the debt.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Let's not mix equalization with SS.

                              What happens after the equalization date, is none of the other persons business with respect to equalization. So for example, if a couple equalizes and both end up with a negative net worth of 100K, then one goes through bankruptcy and the other doesn't. The other spouse can not come after the debt free spouse looking for 50K!

                              However, when SS is determined, and if SS is based on need and ability to pay, then debt load would be a factor, and indirectly, bankruptcy would effect the SS amount.

                              Comment

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