D7 has been having some behaviour issues at school. Her teacher called me last week, to let me know the details. Teacher had already spoke to Mom first and Mom apparently "okayed" teacher to talk to me? (not sure if teacher was actually looking for that "okay", or simply relaying that Mom is good with her speaking to me.
Anyway, D7 having some angry/tantrum/crying episodes during class. They seem to escalate when she is not getting her way about something, or something in class is not going the way she expects. Teacher has mentioned some episodes prior, but they seem to be getting more escalated and frequent as of late, she said. It seems this last one, would not de-escalate, and was getting pretty disruptive to the class, so they got another teacher involved that has more "skills" to handle this. Apparently, that teacher is the "special-ed" teacher. Probably more trained to handle outbursts and such.
So as usual I've talked with the teacher, and I've talked to D7, but I don't know what is causing this. The teacher mentioned that Mom said she's dealing with some issues at home, but didn't know what that entailed. This is news to me of course. D7 made vague references to these issues, but I certainly don't have enough info to know if there is an issue, or if that is her concern, or if she's just echoing Mom's comments. (is she bother by it...or is she bother by Mom's behaviour about it).
I always email Mom with communications, regarding D7. They are mostly ignored. This is less an issue, when I can try to circumvent Mom, and address on my own, but some of this stuff, seems to involve her, or requires some knowledge of what is up.
I also email her, to state things like;
My understanding of this situation sounds like X. Can you let me know if what has been communicated to me, aligns with the converstion you had with school? D7 has brought up Y. I don't really have any details of Y, so can you offer what D7 is speaking about, as I would like to clarify what Y is about.
Almost always ignored.
In-person conversation with her, remains a gong-show.
Which is why email is important.
When she does respond on important school issues, it's the usual crap responses similar to this one I just lately received:
(FYI, she gets her child support via email just fine - but email communication regarding child is always an issue, or a low priority for her. I can show months of ignored email communication. She either states she has no email access or access to Internet, or that she's too busy to bother with emails, it's not her job to check her email, etc, etc, rant, rant)
"Dad2bandm, I only checked my email today. You need to call me about D7 things. I asked teacher to call you because she can better explain issues she's seeing. I gaureentee she didn't say anything about issues at home. If you wanna discuss this call me. I'm not a machine, I'm a human and I'm not talking to a fucking computer dad2bandm. Get thathrough your head. When we need to change scheduling or discuss access email me. Otherwise use the damn phone!"
This is the "toned" version of her. This is what she writes in email to me, on issues such as this. For obvious reasons, in-person conversation is a no-go. In-person conversation has been tried, but she insists it's on her front-step, during child exchanges, and that ends up being idiot ranting, and no discussion on the issue at hand, at all, during the couple of minutes she will dedicate to this, on her front stoop.
I still insist on email, because of this, and because I want to show, that I am attempting to parent with her, on these issues.
The teacher obviously doesn't have any info about what the "issues at home" are, and it was the teacher who said Mom mentioned this. sigh. So, again, working in the dark here, and no communication from Mom, about the issue at hand, involved with D7, but instead stupid "pick up the phone" responses from her.
Anyway, D7 having some angry/tantrum/crying episodes during class. They seem to escalate when she is not getting her way about something, or something in class is not going the way she expects. Teacher has mentioned some episodes prior, but they seem to be getting more escalated and frequent as of late, she said. It seems this last one, would not de-escalate, and was getting pretty disruptive to the class, so they got another teacher involved that has more "skills" to handle this. Apparently, that teacher is the "special-ed" teacher. Probably more trained to handle outbursts and such.
So as usual I've talked with the teacher, and I've talked to D7, but I don't know what is causing this. The teacher mentioned that Mom said she's dealing with some issues at home, but didn't know what that entailed. This is news to me of course. D7 made vague references to these issues, but I certainly don't have enough info to know if there is an issue, or if that is her concern, or if she's just echoing Mom's comments. (is she bother by it...or is she bother by Mom's behaviour about it).
I always email Mom with communications, regarding D7. They are mostly ignored. This is less an issue, when I can try to circumvent Mom, and address on my own, but some of this stuff, seems to involve her, or requires some knowledge of what is up.
I also email her, to state things like;
My understanding of this situation sounds like X. Can you let me know if what has been communicated to me, aligns with the converstion you had with school? D7 has brought up Y. I don't really have any details of Y, so can you offer what D7 is speaking about, as I would like to clarify what Y is about.
Almost always ignored.
In-person conversation with her, remains a gong-show.
Which is why email is important.
When she does respond on important school issues, it's the usual crap responses similar to this one I just lately received:
(FYI, she gets her child support via email just fine - but email communication regarding child is always an issue, or a low priority for her. I can show months of ignored email communication. She either states she has no email access or access to Internet, or that she's too busy to bother with emails, it's not her job to check her email, etc, etc, rant, rant)
"Dad2bandm, I only checked my email today. You need to call me about D7 things. I asked teacher to call you because she can better explain issues she's seeing. I gaureentee she didn't say anything about issues at home. If you wanna discuss this call me. I'm not a machine, I'm a human and I'm not talking to a fucking computer dad2bandm. Get thathrough your head. When we need to change scheduling or discuss access email me. Otherwise use the damn phone!"
This is the "toned" version of her. This is what she writes in email to me, on issues such as this. For obvious reasons, in-person conversation is a no-go. In-person conversation has been tried, but she insists it's on her front-step, during child exchanges, and that ends up being idiot ranting, and no discussion on the issue at hand, at all, during the couple of minutes she will dedicate to this, on her front stoop.
I still insist on email, because of this, and because I want to show, that I am attempting to parent with her, on these issues.
The teacher obviously doesn't have any info about what the "issues at home" are, and it was the teacher who said Mom mentioned this. sigh. So, again, working in the dark here, and no communication from Mom, about the issue at hand, involved with D7, but instead stupid "pick up the phone" responses from her.
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