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motherbear4 · #1 12-06-2012, 07:51 PM

It is my ex's weekend starting tomorrow. He has sent me a text saying he MAY have strep throat, rambled on about being highly contagious, and that he will not be picking them up.

I have responded that I am not available, which I am not. A parent being sick is part of parenthood, just like kids being sick and that he is to pick them up at his usual time.

So, I get the usual "a judge will not be pleased to see/hear that you have abandoned our children" blah blah blah.

I am standing my ground but I know that he will not pick them up. The clincher is he has already been the cause of my being dismissed from two sitters and I cannot have it happen again.

What to do?

blinkandimgone · #2 12-06-2012, 09:08 PM

Drop them off at his place. Problem solved.

standing on the sidelines · #3 12-06-2012, 09:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by blinkandimgone

Drop them off at his place. Problem solved.

true but what happens if he does have strep?? I have never had it nor do I know if its contagious.

OhMy · #4 12-06-2012, 09:29 PM

Unless he licks the children or coughs directly in their faces, it should be as simple as proper hand washing and coughing etiquette to prevent the spead.

Strep Throat

The above link is for kids, however the same would apply for adults.

standing on the sidelines · #5 12-06-2012, 09:38 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by OhMy

Unless he licks the children or coughs directly in their faces, it should be as simple as proper hand washing and coughing etiquette to prevent the spead.

Strep Throat

The above link is for kids, however the same would apply for adults.

thanks for the information

motherbear4 · #6 12-06-2012, 09:40 PM

Thanks everyone, I needed to know if I was off my rocker

Strep is contagious, but seems like everything is contagious

Any time he gets something bacterial, he's the most contagious person ever to walk the face of the earth and has been instructed by a Dr. to stay away from his kids. This is a load of baloney; I simply cannot see a Dr. saying that. Well, I guess I will wait to see if this particular Dr. tells him to stay away from his kids and see what happens when I drop them off. Could be interesting, I've never even been to his place!

And if he were going to infect them, he's already done it from access earlier this week!

OhMy · #7 12-06-2012, 09:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by motherbear4

And if he were going to infect them, he's already done it from access earlier this week!

You are very correct with this statement. Most viruses and bacterial illnesses are most contagious prior to symptoms occurring.

Janus · #8 12-06-2012, 09:56 PM

I'm going to dissent here.

If he is paying full table CS plus proportional s7 expenses, then that represents the sum total of his responsibilities to the children. Anything that he does above and beyond paying the CS is awesome, but optional.

If you are receiving table CS, then you are the parent. If you want the money, you need to accept the obligations that come along with the cash. If you want your ex to be a parent with responsibilities, then change your arrangement to one of shared custody.

If his regular (and, to most of us, bewildering) refusal to use access is causing you a problem, go to the courts to fix that. Until then, it is your problem.

momliz · #9 12-06-2012, 09:57 PM

What would I do? Personally what I would do is not take the chance that my kids could get sick. Plus just dropping them off when he says he doesn't want them is going to cause drama which I try to avoid. I would just make arrangements if I wasn't going to be home. The kids have Grandma and Grandpa who can help out when needed and not everyone has support, I understand. I'm used to my ex being a bit of a flake and bailing at the last minute. If I didn't have a plan B firmly in place for such occassions I don't know what I'd do. Each parent has to do what makes the most sense to them. Good luck.

momliz · #10 12-06-2012, 10:02 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janus

I'm going to dissent here.

If he is paying full table CS plus proportional s7 expenses, then that represents the sum total of his responsibilities to the children. Anything that he does above and beyond paying the CS is awesome, but optional.

If you are receiving table CS, then you are the parent. If you want the money, you need to accept the obligations that come along with the cash. If you want your ex to be a parent with responsibilities, then change your arrangement to one of shared custody.

If his regular (and, to most of us, bewildering) refusal to use access is causing you a problem, go to the courts to fix that. Until then, it is your problem.

I don't agree. Child support and access/custody are two seperate things. Every person is responsible for financially supporting their children. That's a given.

If he is supposed to have visitation but refuses his visit I suggest documenting these occurances. Once day when the kids are bigger and if he suddenly shows interest in his children you will have a documented history of his previous disinterest.

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