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  • Child missing

    I am not going to go into the nitty gritty of my case but I desperatly need help.
    Daughter is 10 years old. I live near Barrie and my ex lives near Burlington. We have been seperated for 9.5 years now and she has had primary residency. EOW sort of deal.

    March 27th my ex was evicted for the 4th time. This time though they were homeless. I retained a lawyer and was successful on an emergency motion to have our daughter live with me temporarily.
    April 13 we went back to court to hear the motion. The judge said that both of our court documents were filled with to much hearsay and that she wanted us to come back in a week with reports from School, CAS, and have our daughter have an interview with an OCL lawyer which I paid for.
    During this hearing my ex brought forth a very sketchy lease for an apartment.
    The judge said that our daughter should go back to her moms April 17th (Monday) but that she should be returned to Simcoe County for the hearing Apr 20th.
    During this week I got evidence that our daughter is struggling in school, got documents about my ex's husband being arrested in the past, and a few other things that are inconsequential to the main part of this.
    April 20th hearing, my lawyer (because I am the applicant we spoke first) plead our case, my ex was late to court so she had not had a chance to speak to duty council. So after pleading our case she spoke to duty council. During this time my lawyer got a fax from CAS with more sever concerns (previous landlord had police attend the house after the eviction, they found a needle in the freezer and razor blades, plus feces throughout the house, paint on walls and holes in walls). Suffice to say, my ex could not win this case. The judge ruled that our daughter was to now reside with me and that my ex was to have every weekend access until our case conference May 9th. The order stated that they must be in the apartment that they provided a lease for, and that I was to have a walk through and see where our daughter would sleep, and that CAS would have to deem it safe, though access can start before any of this happens....and no police enforcement clause...

    First weekend, ex is a no show.
    Second weekend (last Friday) they picked up our daughter. On Sunday, I was supposed to pick up our daughter and have a walk through of the apartment. When I arrived they were not there, no answer at the door. Finally after 15 minutes we got a text saying that they have reported me to CAS for smacking our daughter (totally untrue) and that I would not be allowed to have her. I phoned the local CAS and asked if any report had been brought against me and they said they have not heard a thing. I went to the police station and they agreed to do a welfare check on them. Both CAS and police stated that they are not living at the residence that they are supposed to be living as per the court order. Police did see them at their residence and spoke with my daughter, and she said she wanted to stay with mom so they would not do anything.
    Neither CAS or Police will provide me with their address, and my ex will not respond to anything from me.
    I went Monday and applied for an emergency motion, but as my lawyer put it "we got the judge who does not read material and rarely presides over family court motions" so we were unsuccessful at having my daughter returned.

    I spoke with CAS today and they stated that they have tried numerous times to reach out to my ex through phone calls and through attending the residence but have been unable to reach her, but that they would tell me once my daughter has been interviewed.
    Everyone is saying that it will be resolved at the case conference on May 9th... but I am the primary resident parent legally and yet I have no clue where my daughter is. My ex could be on the run and yet there is nothing I can do. I feel so lost right now.

    Does anyone have any suggestions?
    CAS agrees that things had to be very bad for custody to be changed after so long... but nobody is doing anything. My lawyer is at a loss right now and we are trying to figure out what to do here. So any suggestions would be helpful.

    Thank you

  • #2
    I'm confused. They are not living at the place she showed the lease for, but police saw them at their residence. How did police find the residence?

    You have a current court order that states you have custody. You've basically had custody since March 27. I don't understand why police didn't return her to you based on your custody order.

    Did your daughter continued to go to school near Burlington while she was with you?

    Things may be resolved at the May 9th court date. (I hope she brings her with her). That's a week away, and that's a long time to not know where your daughter is. Is there an arrangement with CAS to bring the child to you if they find reason to remove her from Mom's home?

    I can tell you I would have been waiting outside her school to steal her back. I'm not suggesting that's right, it's just what I would do.

    Comment


    • #3
      police won't help you without police assistance clause however you can just tell them you are the primary parent and you want to press abduction charges against the other parent and have child returned home.

      but best speak to your lawyer and file a contempt motion. or try another emergency motion. i would keep contacting the police in mean time and try getting the other parent charged with abduction and have cas bring child back to you. shes taken the child without consent.

      why don't you get child from school and tell school to not release child to other parent and give them your court order? they would be all over this if you were mom and she was dad.. all over it.
      Last edited by trinton; 05-03-2017, 12:41 PM.

      Comment


      • #4
        1. Is the child attending school? (Call the school now to validate attendance.)
        2. Did the police confirm that they had contact with the child in the past 5 days?

        First and foremost you need to determine if the child is still within their habitual residential location. The best way to validate it is through school attendance. If there have been 5 days of back-to-back non-attendance then you have an issue and need to escalate.

        If the child cannot be located and a court ordered child custody and access agreement/order is not being followed you may have grounds to escalte the matter under Section 282.(1) of the Criminal Code.

        To do this you will need the consent of the Attorney General or counsel (crown) instructed by them to proceed with the criminal charge. Generally, I would recommend 5 consecutive non-school attendances within a week and 5 days of failed welfare checks by the police. Your lawyer should have the number of a criminal lawyer who can bring the matter to the Crown Attorney to get things moving.

        Your lawyer should be requesting the welfare checks from the police. Many police officers will just think you are a nutty parent. But, when a lawyer calls representing a client they usually do not balk at the request.

        Ultimately, you need to have a third party organization (school or police) validate that they have not had contact with the child. As well, an access order that provides that you have lawful care and child of the child that is being denied to you. (Also the child has to be <14 years of age.)

        Panic will not work in your favour in this situation. The other evidence that will assist you is any physical (or electronic) evidence that the parent has an intent to move.

        Surely you have mutual friends that can verify that the child has not been removed from their habitual residential location. You can always leverage that as well. The key is to locate the child.

        See para 18 onwards as to what evidence is needed to present a possible child abduction in a family law matter: https://www.canlii.org/en/on/onsc/do...14onsc915.html

        At a minimum, you need to present a prima facie case that the other parent has abducted the child or is planning an abduction. This not easy to do.

        Good Luck!
        Tayken

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by paris View Post
          I can tell you I would have been waiting outside her school to steal her back. I'm not suggesting that's right, it's just what I would do.
          It indeed is not the right thing to do. But, do verify attendance at the school to ensure the child has not left the jurisdiction.

          It is never a good idea to escalate a custody and access dispute through removing the child from the other parent. Don't add to the confusion and complexity the child is experiencing. The best place to resolve the issue is in court.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by paris View Post
            I can tell you I would have been waiting outside her school to steal her back. I'm not suggesting that's right, it's just what I would do.
            I hear you Paris. If you recall, my daughter was abducted to an undisclosed location. My ex accidentally disclosed her location in her court paper work. It took everything I had not to go get her. I had to exercise my rights..no..my daughters rights the right way though.

            Tayken's right on this point. I'm glad I didn't .. but damn would have felt good to get her back.

            OP .. listen to Tayken's advice very carefully.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Tayken View Post
              1. Is the child attending school? (Call the school now to validate attendance.)
              2. Did the police confirm that they had contact with the child in the past 5 days?

              First and foremost you need to determine if the child is still within their habitual residential location. The best way to validate it is through school attendance. If there have been 5 days of back-to-back non-attendance then you have an issue and need to escalate.

              If the child cannot be located and a court ordered child custody and access agreement/order is not being followed you may have grounds to escalte the matter under Section 282.(1) of the Criminal Code.

              To do this you will need the consent of the Attorney General or counsel (crown) instructed by them to proceed with the criminal charge. Generally, I would recommend 5 consecutive non-school attendances within a week and 5 days of failed welfare checks by the police. Your lawyer should have the number of a criminal lawyer who can bring the matter to the Crown Attorney to get things moving.

              Your lawyer should be requesting the welfare checks from the police. Many police officers will just think you are a nutty parent. But, when a lawyer calls representing a client they usually do not balk at the request.

              Ultimately, you need to have a third party organization (school or police) validate that they have not had contact with the child. As well, an access order that provides that you have lawful care and child of the child that is being denied to you. (Also the child has to be <14 years of age.)

              Panic will not work in your favour in this situation. The other evidence that will assist you is any physical (or electronic) evidence that the parent has an intent to move.

              Surely you have mutual friends that can verify that the child has not been removed from their habitual residential location. You can always leverage that as well. The key is to locate the child.

              See para 18 onwards as to what evidence is needed to present a possible child abduction in a family law matter: https://www.canlii.org/en/on/onsc/do...14onsc915.html

              At a minimum, you need to present a prima facie case that the other parent has abducted the child or is planning an abduction. This not easy to do.

              Good Luck!
              Tayken
              Thank you taken. As of April 20th when the order went through that I was to have custody and primary residence of our daughter, I enrolled her in school locally here.
              On March 27th my ex became homeless. In our court motion she brought a lease for an apartment but it was sketchy. The judge ruled that while in moms care on weekends, she must be in that apartment and that I was able to have a walk through of that apartment.
              They do not live at this apartment though, CAS and Police confirmed that they are living somewhere else, but refuse to tell me where. All they could do is confirm that they absolutly do not live at the apartment that they provided a lease for during our motion.
              Police have done a welfare check but said if the child does not wish to go with them, they will not force her. They and CAS know where they are.
              On an odd turn, today CAS told me that they have confirmed that our daughter is now registered in a school in Burlington (not the same school that she was going to in March before the eviction). They said that they could tell me that since I am the custodial parent.
              I contacted the school and confirmed that our daughter is attending there. I showed the school the court order as well. The principal stated that she would not allow our daughter to come with me even though I have a court order that she is to reside with me. I just do not get it anymore.
              I still have no idea where my ex is living with our daughter even though I am the custodial parent and have primary residency.
              We go for a case conference May 9th in front of the same judge that ordered the change in custody and think that is my only hope right now.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by paris View Post
                I'm confused. They are not living at the place she showed the lease for, but police saw them at their residence. How did police find the residence?

                You have a current court order that states you have custody. You've basically had custody since March 27. I don't understand why police didn't return her to you based on your custody order.

                Did your daughter continued to go to school near Burlington while she was with you?

                Things may be resolved at the May 9th court date. (I hope she brings her with her). That's a week away, and that's a long time to not know where your daughter is. Is there an arrangement with CAS to bring the child to you if they find reason to remove her from Mom's home?

                I can tell you I would have been waiting outside her school to steal her back. I'm not suggesting that's right, it's just what I would do.
                Thank you Paris.
                Our daughter was enrolled in school with me here, near Barrie once the order came through.
                Police are regularly meeting with my Ex's husband, he is on their radar and they constantly know exactly where he is... yeah... I know..
                Until today I did not know she was attending school in Burlington, it contradiction to the court order.

                Comment


                • #9
                  I would go over the principles head and go straight to the School Board. The principle seems to have no issue with being in contempt, same with your ex.

                  Document, document, document. I assume you are emailing your ex requesting that she return the child to you per the court order? I assume you or your lawyer has also sent such a letter to her lawyer? You need to be on her lawyer, as they may need to educate the ex about why this looks really bad on them.

                  Part of me says go to the school, bringing the court order and the police. But a bigger part of me says that is a bad idea, and will only upset the child. Not sure what can be done as it doesn't look like anyone is willing to do their job.

                  Comment


                  • #10
                    Originally posted by HammerDad View Post
                    I would go over the principles head and go straight to the School Board. The principle seems to have no issue with being in contempt, same with your ex.

                    Document, document, document. I assume you are emailing your ex requesting that she return the child to you per the court order? I assume you or your lawyer has also sent such a letter to her lawyer? You need to be on her lawyer, as they may need to educate the ex about why this looks really bad on them.

                    Part of me says go to the school, bringing the court order and the police. But a bigger part of me says that is a bad idea, and will only upset the child. Not sure what can be done as it doesn't look like anyone is willing to do their job.
                    Everything is documented, from the time I went to police Sunday night when we were first informed that my ex would not be returning our daughter as per the court order.

                    The principal at our daughters "burlington" school phoned the police about the matter, and they in turn phoned me to let me know that my daughter is safe, but they said that if I were to pick up our daughter from school that a larger police investigation would happen.
                    I just don't get any of this anymore.
                    I am just praying that when we go in front of the Judge on the 9th that they see the situation for what it is.

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      first of all why is the principal allowing a non custodial parent to change schools and enroll the child.

                      second of all why isn't cas telling mom to leave the home and telling you where they live so you can go and take your child. or apprehanding the child and giving her to you. perhaps they have no power to intervene.

                      so why don't you hire a private investigator to spy at the school to figure out where your kids live and why don't you file an emergency motion asking for police assistance clause? the police know where she lives, she's obviously burdened your child to take sides. mother is obviously not fit and in contempt of a court order. if I was the judge I would order supervised access to mom until child got re united with you as well as find the school board in contempt. but you need to plan plan plan and act fast. the longer this takes the greater the chance your child will be fully alienated.
                      Last edited by trinton; 05-03-2017, 06:17 PM.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by trinton View Post
                        first of all why is the principal allowing a non custodial parent to change schools and enroll the child.

                        second of all why isn't cas telling mom to leave the home and telling you where they live so you can go and take your child. or apprehanding the child and giving her to you. perhaps they have no power to intervene.

                        so why don't you hire a private investigator to spy at the school to figure out where your kids live and why don't you file an emergency motion asking for police assistance clause? the police know where she lives, she's obviously burdened your child to take sides. mother is obviously not fit and in contempt of a court order. if I was the judge I would order supervised access to mom until child got re united with you as well as find the school board in contempt. but you need to plan plan plan and act fast. the longer this takes the greater the chance your child will be fully alienated.
                        I am unsure as to how the principal allowed her to be enrolled. I just know that she is enrolled.
                        CAS and police to not deem my ex's living arrangements to be dangerous for a child to be living there, and without court direction to apprehend our daughter they are unwilling to do anything except a "welfare" check.
                        None of this makes alot of sense, but I do remember the judge giving my ex a stern warning that it would not be advisable if she decided to not return our daughter. I am hoping because we are in front of the same judge that it will be helpful. I did apply for an emergency motion Monday and was unsuccessful, because Police and CAS did not deem our daughter to be in imminent danger.
                        As for hiring a private investigator, I would not really gain anything at this point from knowing exactly where she lives. Her withholding that info from me makes her essentially hiding.
                        Police spoke to me today, and oddly enough informed me that if I went to her school and picked our daughter up without moms consent, that there would be a very large police investigation into myself...
                        So I think it best to wait until the 9th and hope for the best. It is such a messed up situation in so many ways that a parent is allowed to basically go completely against a court order, change a kids schools and move a kid and nobody can do anything.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          and what exactly would the police investigate you for? unabducting your child? I wonder if they would have any issue with a mother taking child back from school if dad took child against sole custody order.

                          however I think it's good on you for just sitting back patiently for next court date. good parents are patient.

                          let us know how next court date goes. I think the judge is going to throw her out of court.hopefully you habe a motion set returnable that date and not just a case conference.

                          the Children’s Law Reform Act also provides that a court may give authority for law enforcement officers to locate, apprehend and deliver a child back to a custodial parent. This includes orders to enter and search in the appropriate circumstances. Further, the Act permits a court to authorize private persons such as private investigators and social workers to apprehend a child
                          Last edited by trinton; 05-03-2017, 10:28 PM.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            This is what's happening. The agencies that are supposed to protect children and follow careful guidelines (such as adhering to custody orders) have tossed you in to the steaming pile of high conflict parents who use them daily for insignificant, unsupported reasons. For one reaon or another, they're ignoring the law, something that may even bite them later.

                            God forbid something were to happen to your child under their care (did I hear needles in the freezer, etc?), they will be thoroughly investigated and I personally wouldn't stop suing their asses until I owned them.

                            When it happened to me I called the police first and same as you...no help (I didn't have custody order mind you .. wasn't even separated from my ex yet).

                            Next I called CAS .. no help. After that I attended an Emergency Motion .. and same as you .. kid was in no imminent danger and there was nothing I could do. So trust me when I tell you I know how you feel.

                            Do you have a police record? Any domestic calls between you and ex? DUI's? What does she think she has? I forgot if you mentioned .. has CAS made the visit to your home yet for an interview)

                            Section 282

                            (1) [ Abduction in contravention of custody order ]

                            Every one who, being the parent, guardian or person having the lawful care or charge of a person under the age of fourteen years, takes, entices away, conceals, detains, receives or harbours that person, in contravention of the custody provisions of a custody order in relation to that person made by a court anywhere in Canada, with intent to deprive a parent or guardian, or any other person who has the lawful care or charge of that person, of the possession of that person is guilty of

                            (a) an indictable offence and is liable to imprisonment for a term not exceeding ten years, or
                            (b) an offence punishable on summary conviction.

                            (2) [ Where no belief in validity of custody order ]

                            Where a count charges an offence under subsection (1) and the offence is not proven only because the accused did not believe that there was a valid custody order but the evidence does prove an offence under section 283, the accused may be convicted of an offence under section 283.
                            Sections 282 and 283 of the Criminal Code of Canada
                            What she has done is just plain illegal and it irks me that your child wasn't returned to you quickly and promptly.

                            She uprooted the child from school, peers, family and community and unilaterally started a new life for her .. without you. Another schemer playing the system. Now expect the delay game so she can claim "status quo". I'm still not sure why they even have abduction laws.

                            Get any doc's you can, including the one's that clear you from her allegations (I think she said you hit the child or something).

                            The child didn't want to go with police to come back to you ... that's a PRIME example of parental alienation. For all you know the child was told that you did something unthinkable or that you left them.

                            You want to bring every piece of evidence of you trying to get your child back. I even called Missing Kids Canada .. I e-mailed the gov't, I did everything possible short of just going and getting her.

                            Really, all you should need to do is show the judge your custody order, referring to the CLRA ... and outline how everybody here is basically in contempt and that something needs to be done immediately. These laws are here for a reason and a "good" judge will rectify this nonsense right away.

                            Regarding the school, follow Hammerdad's advice and go to the board. Your ex has poisoned them .. you're Tony Soprano to them right now. But a custody order is no joke, perhaps the school needs to be reminded of that.

                            Just go kick the abductor's ass in court and report back. I want to hear what happened.

                            You better not leave there without a clear cut enforcement clause to wake the police up.
                            Last edited by LovingFather32; 05-03-2017, 11:22 PM.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by fireweb13 View Post
                              The principal at our daughters "burlington" school phoned the police about the matter, and they in turn phoned me to let me know that my daughter is safe, but they said that if I were to pick up our daughter from school that a larger police investigation would happen.
                              Invite the police to conduct a larger investigation. Also note to them that in accordance with 282.(1) of the CCC they need approval from the Attorney General for abduction charges and you have a court order to rely upon. Furthermore, you will bring the necessary complaints and lawsuits against them for improper procedure and practice. Advise them this is a civil matter and not a criminal one and one that was ordered by a sitting Superior Court Justice. Just make sure the court order in your possession is NOT a photocopy but, has the court house seal on it.

                              Do as Hammerdad suggests. Go way over the head of the principal. In fact, the registration without consent or a court order to a new school is against the Education Act. You can talk to an education officer directly about this situation (at the Ministry of Education). They will pull the child from the school so long as you have the appropriate court order and sanction the school. (Basically, they remove the payment they are getting for the child's enrollment at the school right out of their budget.)

                              If you have the order then, you have the right to follow the order. You need to bring a witness with you to the school. My recommendation would be to retain a private security service in full uniform with a camera to record everything. This sounds extreme but, when a school professional misbehaves like this you need to stand up to them. They are undereducated in the law. The security detail is simply to protect your rights and to be a professional witness at court or in a future lawsuit against the school. Most times they are off duty officers and are great at negotiation with the police. Most times they know the officer personally that comes to bother you.

                              Good Luck!
                              Tayken

                              Comment

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