Opting out: Women can have an abortion, some men say they should have a choice over p

[FightingForFamily]

Agreed. Why do people always "blame" men for sex and pregnancy? It takes two, and the women has just as much responsibility for her decision to have sex. Yet 0.1 seconds after the sex is done, the women has all the rights... the right to decide on the fate of the child, the right to claim her sexual partner's money for the next 20 years. This is feminism, not equality.

[arabian]

um.... often the woman does bear the responsibility for her actions, particularly when the dude takes off, never to be heard from again. Do you think that is why there are so many teen pregnancy programs around the country attended by teenage girls?

I guess it's a matter of "you play ... you pay" FOR BOTH PEOPLE.

I don't see this as feminism, rather a taste of reality.

[Mess]

Men have a choice whether they want to donate blood or a kidney to sustain another life.

Women have a similar choice whether to donate their body for nine months to sustain anther life.

We have the right to control our own bodies. That is true for both men and women.

The decision made according to who impregnated whom or whether child support will have to be paid.

[fireweb13]

Its an interesting article though, alot of debate and opinion.
When it comes down to it though currently a Man must decide before having sex with a woman if he wishes for a chance to have a child and be responsible for it forever, but a woman can do as she wishes. If initial birth control fails she can chose to have an abortion and use that as a form of birth control after the fact. Whereas once fertilized a man loses all rights. So really, women can sleep around if they wish and can deal with all consequences however they want where as a man cannot.

I have seen several things to help with my opinion.
4 Women I know have chosen to keep a child when the father wanted nothing to do with it, they have not gone after him and continued with their lives. They have gone onto having (so far) successful marriages and the new man has been so far great. In doing so the mother has not had the stress of trying to force a dad who wants nothing to do with this child in her life and always fighting and has been able to move on with her life and be happier for her child.
Whereas if you spend so much time and effort fighting to make someone responsible and make someone pay when you don't want them in the childs life and they don't want to be in the childs life it creates a huge stress for you and holds you back from moving forward with your life.

Though men do not have to deal with having an abortion and all that comes along with it, we do not have a choice to go through it. I am sure many men would go through the process if we were physically able to so that they did not have a child, but just as a woman is the carrier of the fetus, and can undo the decision they made, a man cannot undo it and is responsible no matter what.

[Pursuinghappiness]

If initial birth control fails she can chose to have an abortion and use that as a form of birth control after the fact. Whereas once fertilized a man loses all rights.

...a man cannot undo it and is responsible no matter what.

Men can make the decision to walk away from children anytime they want. No woman can force a man to be a father.

Unless you're equating being financially responsible for an irresponsible decision as the same thing as being a father. I think that's an insult to men that actually act as fathers...there's more to it than having to write a check.

I volunteered at a youth center and know many women (girls actually) that had abortions. I never met one that took it lightly or didn't live hard with the decision they made. Bad choices have consequences. The idea that all these women are walking around just having sex whenever they want and having an abortion a few weeks later is ludicrous.

[fireweb13]

Men can make the decision to walk away from children anytime they want. No woman can force a man to be a father.

Unless you're equating being financially responsible for an irresponsible decision as the same thing as being a father. I think that's an insult to men that actually act as fathers...there's more to it than having to write a check.

I volunteered at a youth center and know many women (girls actually) that had abortions. I never met one that took it lightly or didn't live hard with the decision they made. Bad choices have consequences. The idea that all these women are walking around just having sex whenever they want and having an abortion a few weeks later is ludicrous.

Men can't just walk away. If they do they will lose their drivers licenses, have wages garnished and possibly go to jail. They can only hide so long right.
Of course there is more to being a father than writing a cheque, but being a father biologically and being a childs Dad are 2 different things. Writing a cheque is what you are legally obligated to do if you fathered a child.

I doubt many women/girls take abortion lightly, but it is their choice. Men do not get that choice, but are forced to live with the consequences of someone else's choice. Yes men can choose to not have sex with anyone they would not want to create a child with, but is that realistic? People are going to have sex, but a man/boy is responsible from that moment forward and throws his future into the hands of someone else. Whereas if a woman/girl gets pregnant by *accident* (I use that term loosely) she has options. So it means that when it comes to sex men must be more responsible from the begining than women need to be.

[Pursuinghappiness]

Writing a cheque is what you are legally obligated to do if you fathered a child.

There are lots of bad things that can happen for a lifetime when you make poor decisions. Drinking and driving, taking drugs, etc., etc., etc. You make the wrong choice and there can be a myriad of very dire consequences. On this particular issue...your bad choices are more biologically specific but railing against women because they're the host organism for a fetus is ridiculous. Women bear the brunt of bad sexual decisions just like men do and have born far more of the brunt of them since the dawn of time. Child support is actually a fairly new phenomena and frankly, its a minimum requirement. No one can force a man to be a father against their will. Men decide not to be father's all the time.

Yes men can choose to not have sex with anyone they would not want to create a child with, but is that realistic?

Yes, I think wearing a condom during sex if you don't want a kid or an STD is extremely realistic.

[fireweb13]

Women bear the brunt of bad sexual decisions just like men do and have born far more of the brunt of them since the dawn of time. Child support is actually a fairly new phenomena and frankly, its a minimum requirement. No one can force a man to be a father against their will. Men decide not to be father's all the time.




Yes, I think wearing a condom during sex if you don't want a kid or an STD is extremely realistic.

We are not talking about the dawn of time though, we are talking about 2013 where we should be able to be treated equally. Because of biology women can make the decision once pregnant to either have a child or not. Once a woman is pregnant a man cannot make that decision.
Men also decide to be fathers all the time. You cannot force a guy to be a dad, but you can force him to pay for 18 + years for something that after conception the woman decided unilaterally to keep.
Its great when a child has a mom and a dad that love them and care for them, but thats not always the case.
My wife is pregnant, and I love my unborn child very much. Yeah the child is not in me but there is nothing I can do about that, but I do love it. But its frustrating that if she chose to abort it she can do so without any consultation from me. If I were to have a 1 night stand and a condom broke, and the woman decided to keep the child that is 100% her choice even though the initial action was 50% him and 50% her. So the man must up front decide where a women can chose after the fact. I am not saying in any means that abortion is an easy choice for a woman, but it is her choice. We do not have that choice. If after pregnancy occures and a man decides he does not want to have a child, he does not get that choice.

[takeontheworld]

Women have options that men do not. Wether or not you agree with abortions or not is a moot point, the fact remains that they are available for women. If a woman choses to not have a baby, then she can so chose.
A man, does not have that option. Regardless if its the man wants to keep it and the woman doesn't or vice versa. I believe its unfair.

[Pursuinghappiness]

Men also decide to be fathers all the time. You cannot force a guy to be a dad, but you can force him to pay for 18 + years for something that after conception the woman decided unilaterally to keep.

Simply put...since you know what your sperm is capable of, don't leave it in strange places unless you accept the risk. Decisions have consequences.

Yeah the child is not in me but there is nothing I can do about that,

Maybe you can pray to the vagina god to give you one too. But until then, differing biology means different choices. Women have lived with the consequences of their biology for a long, long time. Both sexes enjoy benefits and liabilities based on their gender.

[fireweb13]

Simply put...since you know what your sperm is capable of, don't leave it in strange places unless you accept the risk. Decisions have consequences.



Maybe you can pray to the vagina god to give you one too. But until then, differing biology means different choices. Women have lived with the consequences of their biology for a long, long time. Both sexes enjoy benefits and liabilities based on their gender.

So you are NOT for equal rights? Because we are different we should have a different set of rights?
Our biology should not dictate our rights.

[Pursuinghappiness]

Men don't carry fetuses. When men do, yes I support their right to make decisions about whether or not to carry that fetus to term.

[fireweb13]

Men don't carry fetuses. When men do, yes I support their right to make decisions about whether or not to carry that fetus to term.

But it takes 2 to make a fetus, yet only one to decide to have a baby.

[takeontheworld]

So you are NOT for equal rights? Because we are different we should have a different set of rights?
Our biology should not dictate our rights.

I agree, its not equal rights. Effects of abortion and wether or not it should be allowed, biology etc is all moot.

A woman is capable of terminating her parental rights. A man can not.

A one night stand for example, a man clearly tells the woman, he does not want a baby, he does not want to be a father etc, etc. She forwhatever her reasons are, regardless if its against her personal beliefs or simply because she has some crazy idea that the dude will marry her, she choses to keep the baby, I think a man should have the option of opting out. Just my opinion.

[fireweb13]

I agree, its not equal rights. Effects of abortion and wether or not it should be allowed, biology etc is all moot.

A woman is capable of terminating her parental rights. A man can not.

A one night stand for example, a man clearly tells the woman, he does not want a baby, he does not want to be a father etc, etc. She forwhatever her reasons are, regardless if its against her personal beliefs or simply because she has some crazy idea that the dude will marry her, she choses to keep the baby, I think a man should have the option of opting out. Just my opinion.

As PH is saying though, its biology. Men just should not do it unless they want to make a baby. No amount of precaution matters as it can happen. Though she can make the decision for their combined fetus because its in her.