This will be a book, so please bear with me.
Some time ago I had some general questions, mostly surrounding filing for a divorce. Of course, due to financial reasons, I have yet to do so and have since filed for sole custody along with support (for the 2nd time - the first one was dismissed as we decided to share them 50/50 once he was able to move to a place that would accomodate them).
That all changed in May '07 due to violent behaviour from his live-in girlfriend (who he now has a 1 or so year old with). In June of this year, she finally plead guilty to her charge of assault with a weapon, was given a 90 day conditional sentencing and a no contact order that bars her from any contact with myself or the kids, nor can she be within 100 metres of our residence. This last through her probation period - which will end in 2009.
Now I already know that if I wanted to add to that date, I would have to take it to family court, but I also know that the chances of getting an order placed against her after her probation is up are exactly NIL.
That being said, I have since filed new papers with the court to start action against him requesting permanent sole custody and a determination of child support.
Here's the skinny (or fat if you add some butter):
I have NEVER been given reasonable notice - he will only call mere hours before he has had visits with them. The kids want to see him, thus any plans I make with them get cancelled due to this, and it also means I cannot make any plans because of the short notice, and the fact that he almost always only takes them for 90 minutes. Basically the only time I do not have the kids is while I am at work, or they are in school.
So, now that I have bored you to tears, a few questions, things I am curious about etc.
Firstly we go to court September 2nd. I served him with the papers July 31st, which gives him until August 30th to file the answer or financial or both if he does as such.
What if he doesn't? Will this do nothing more than drag on the proceedings in court, since they cannot make a determination for child support.
If he does (or his lawyer if he went back to one), I am anticipating that he will also file for undue hardship, which requires me to file a financial - if I have it prepared for the day of court on the 2nd, and I am required to file one, am I able to submit this to the court right then & there without having to do it after? - travelling the 1 hour to the court I have to file it in to update the continuing record, serve a copy on him, file the affadavit etc etc
What are my chances for permanent sole custody? - He, the girlfriend & their child live in a small 2 bedroom basement apartment 1 hour away - remember, she has the no contact order until December 2009.
He is not involved in their life, their education, their health. He barely makes any attempt to contact them in any way, and he doesn't help raise them at all.
Child support - what are the chances of the court determining an amounts retroactive from August 2005 to July 2006 where he paid nothing, and then from May 2007 to present minus $800?
Thank you for suffering the book and for any help given.
BTW - yes I am representing myself, and I am prepared to fight him without giving up this time - I gave in once, and look what happened - never again.
Some time ago I had some general questions, mostly surrounding filing for a divorce. Of course, due to financial reasons, I have yet to do so and have since filed for sole custody along with support (for the 2nd time - the first one was dismissed as we decided to share them 50/50 once he was able to move to a place that would accomodate them).
That all changed in May '07 due to violent behaviour from his live-in girlfriend (who he now has a 1 or so year old with). In June of this year, she finally plead guilty to her charge of assault with a weapon, was given a 90 day conditional sentencing and a no contact order that bars her from any contact with myself or the kids, nor can she be within 100 metres of our residence. This last through her probation period - which will end in 2009.
Now I already know that if I wanted to add to that date, I would have to take it to family court, but I also know that the chances of getting an order placed against her after her probation is up are exactly NIL.
That being said, I have since filed new papers with the court to start action against him requesting permanent sole custody and a determination of child support.
Here's the skinny (or fat if you add some butter):
- Separated August 2005
- First court date Jan 6, 2006 - temporary order of primary residence with me, reasonable access upon reasonable notice for him, and time for him to file a financial
- More court dates with stalling from his lawyer - demand for a financial from me - mediation requested (these were different court dates btw) - mediation cancelled, his lawyer claimed she fired him & he no longer had legal representation. A week after the mediation should have happened, she was 're-hired' - still no interim order for child support
- July 2006 - No longer able to keep up to missing time from work for court, child care costs etc etc with no child support in any way - I agree to a 50/50 split in order to best provide for the children & keep a roof over their heads, food on the table, and clothes on their backs - everything stays quiet
- Early May 2007 - 8 yr old son is returned home for their week with me - severe bruising - hospital, police, CAS etc (you get the picture)
- June 2007 after no contact & pushing from CAS for him to act like a parent - he offers to give $400 a month of support (4 kids) - I agree to it temporarily, as something is better than nothing.
- June $400 received - has two 90 minute visits with the kids that month
- July - no money received, makes excuses, does not visit or call or speak to the children in any way
- August $400 received - One 90 minute visit with the kids during the month
- September - no money received, more excuses, spends $127 in total for all 4 kids on school clothes, One full day visit
- October, November - no money, no calls, no visits
- December - no money - just days before Christmas, arrives with some gifts for the kids, stays at the door handing gifts, doesn't speak to the kids, and leaves
- Early January '08 - mad at me for having the nerve to ask if he is going to help financially with the kids - refuses contact - no money (How shocking is that)
- End of February - day after youngest child turns 9 - 90 minute visit to travel to store, get a gift, drive around, bring kids home - no money (there's a theme here).
- March - no money, no contact
- Early April - day after 3rd child turns 10 - 90 minute visit (repeat of the February visit) - again, no money
- May - yep, you got it, no money, no contact
- Early June - oldest 2 kids birthdays (3 days apart) - takes the kids to the drive-in - pick up at 6pm, return at 3am (yep, I am not kidding) - no gifts, no money
- June - Fathers Day - picks up kids in the morning & takes them to see his parents for the day - drops them off before suppertime
- July, August - no contact, no money (though there is a week left in this month and I suspect the only contact there will be would be to serve me with either the Answer or the financial he is required to file by August 30th)
I have NEVER been given reasonable notice - he will only call mere hours before he has had visits with them. The kids want to see him, thus any plans I make with them get cancelled due to this, and it also means I cannot make any plans because of the short notice, and the fact that he almost always only takes them for 90 minutes. Basically the only time I do not have the kids is while I am at work, or they are in school.
So, now that I have bored you to tears, a few questions, things I am curious about etc.
Firstly we go to court September 2nd. I served him with the papers July 31st, which gives him until August 30th to file the answer or financial or both if he does as such.
What if he doesn't? Will this do nothing more than drag on the proceedings in court, since they cannot make a determination for child support.
If he does (or his lawyer if he went back to one), I am anticipating that he will also file for undue hardship, which requires me to file a financial - if I have it prepared for the day of court on the 2nd, and I am required to file one, am I able to submit this to the court right then & there without having to do it after? - travelling the 1 hour to the court I have to file it in to update the continuing record, serve a copy on him, file the affadavit etc etc
What are my chances for permanent sole custody? - He, the girlfriend & their child live in a small 2 bedroom basement apartment 1 hour away - remember, she has the no contact order until December 2009.
He is not involved in their life, their education, their health. He barely makes any attempt to contact them in any way, and he doesn't help raise them at all.
Child support - what are the chances of the court determining an amounts retroactive from August 2005 to July 2006 where he paid nothing, and then from May 2007 to present minus $800?
Thank you for suffering the book and for any help given.
BTW - yes I am representing myself, and I am prepared to fight him without giving up this time - I gave in once, and look what happened - never again.
Comment