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Humorous things that happened during your divorce

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  • #31
    Originally posted by qwiksylvr View Post
    I wish I could post the judgement coz you'd all have a laugh at what his testimony was.
    Why can you not post the judgement?

    Cheers!

    Gary

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    • #32
      Hope we get some more people posting humorous things on this thread.

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      • #33
        Before my ex and I separated I got fed up with being maid and taxi while he slept until 3pm every day and went on strike.
        A few days later he was feeling a little guilty I guess and did a load if laundry. He comes upstairs with a stack of clean towels and says honey...where do these go? I replied with....Really? Where do you get them when you want a clean one?

        I should have known right then and there that there was no hope.

        F

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        • #34
          Exes lawyers went on an insane rant at the last conference in front of a judge.Apparently I hadn't gotten some paperwork done (no idea what he was talking about).Then the judge proceeded to tell the lawyer that doing that paperwork was in fact his job, and as a lawyer he wasn't doing a very good job!
          I have had every accusation you could name levelled at me.Some are really funny though!Ex was saying that I had no family where I live now and had his lawyer try to convince my lawyer that I was a basket case and a liar.I live down the road from the hospital I was born in and have over 40 family members in a 20 miles radius.Thats actually a conservative estimate,I havent gotten into the second cousins yet.. but no..I really have no family???

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          • #35
            I still get a chuckle out of this one. After I left the mat home, my tbx made a list of household items. Included in his list were:

            Toilet Paper
            Unused Kitty Litter

            I kid you not. And he is a wealthy man.

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            • #36
              Originally posted by caranna View Post
              I still get a chuckle out of this one. After I left the mat home, my tbx made a list of household items. Included in his list were;

              Toilet Paper
              Unused Kitty Litter

              I kid you not. And he is a wealthy man.
              He was careful to say UNUSED kitty litter lol!

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              • #37
                Too funny you guys!

                Thats what we have to do sometimes - LAUGH. Sure beats cryin!

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                • #38
                  He was careful to say UNUSED kitty litter lol!
                  Yes, that "qualifier" did not escape my attention. That made it even funnier.

                  Someone told me to send him some of the used kitty litter. Believe me, I was tempted for a second or 2 to mail him a chunk. ...

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                  • #39
                    unused kitty litter??? must be for icy driveway in the winter or...... what?

                    Yep you did yourself a favor by losing that fella.

                    When I kicked my ex out I made sure a few bags of garbage were tossed into the moving van when movers came for his furniture! Should have done the shrimp shell thing and put them into a few couch cushions.

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                    • #40
                      Oh I like to laugh about it ,Im broke but Im free My kids are happy they are signed up for counselling ,and pretty soon we will have gotten over the nightmare. I have more friends now than I was ever ALLOWED during my marriage and can now see my family and friends whenever I want.The kids are doing great in school ,and are becoming little socialites because they too now have friends, and are allowed to see then outside of school. Whenever I get the new round of lies and accusations I laugh-then I get factual evidence to disprove them ,it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy .

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                      • #41
                        unused kitty litter??? must be for icy driveway in the winter or...... what?
                        The litter was for my 2 cats.

                        Isn't it funny that he would include the kitty litter, toilet paper, bathroom plunger, houseplant fertilizer but not include on his list the valuable very old book collection.

                        He left some of these old books but took the most valuable ones, again not reporting them as taken.

                        Oh well, at least he did report the Charmin toilet paper.

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                        • #42
                          Originally posted by caranna View Post
                          The litter was for my 2 cats.

                          Isn't it funny that he would include the kitty litter, toilet paper, bathroom plunger, houseplant fertilizer but not include on his list the valuable very old book collection.

                          He left some of these old books but took the most valuable ones, again not reporting them as taken.

                          Oh well, at least he did report the Charmin toilet paper.
                          did he say "unused" ???

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                          • #43
                            so he was making a list of things he wanted or took from the home and kitty litter and toilet paper was on the list? Why would he think anyone cares about that? Probably just a red herring to try to throw you off the scent of the book collection.

                            I thought my ex would want all sorts of things from the kitchen/dining room. Nope. Thought he might want some of the 1500 thread count sheets or the expensive towels. Nope. He wanted the stuff from the garage and the basement including a very out-dated 62" television, old furniture. Basically crap. Oh yeah and all these stupid pictures of hockey players that I would buy him from time to time at charity auctions. He had no comprehension of value of things. He had plenty of time to consider (months). Oh well, in the end it's just stuff and I know I have way too much of it.

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                            • #44
                              did he say "unused" ???
                              Too funny!

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                              • #45
                                Yes he wanted to throw in as many red herrings as possible. His value of the household items are around 10x more than market value. He even overvalued the unused kitty litter and unused toilet paper.

                                He took a lot of household furniture and the best antiques. He took the big dining room table and huge TV and entertainment set and even my iMac. He wouldn't touch my iMac when we were together, instead preferring his HP desktop.

                                I haven't asked for anything back. As long as the proper evaluation of the items
                                are agreed upon I can start working on my net worth. I won't even go into the insane demands he made on his net worth statement.. well, not right now anyway. If there was an icon for a finger making circles on the side of the head I'd use it.

                                We have to get to the bottom of this. Pun intended.

                                Stay tuned for more funnies. I'll be hearing from my lawyer this week. Should be hilarious the next month or so.

                                Comment

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