time is approaching and my nerves are shot

[littleman]

the time for my appearance is approaching and Im starting to get nervous.......with the things that I have I am pretty sure that I will be granted physical custody of my child (whether it be joint or sole that will be determined)........I dont want to have keep taking time off work to get something resolved that if he was any kind of parent in the first place he would have stepped and help provide for our child....(sorry for the vent)....how much longer am I looking at for this crap before its over........he attempts to start an arguement with me over everything or anything......all I do is smile and let him rant........he emails me and I depending on content I will either reply sooooooooo politely it will give any one a cavity or I just keep the email for future reference........as of today again no support for this month (thats nothing new of course though).......I dont know how much more I can take of his lies and excuses thats all or how much longer I have to deal with this before I can show him he was very wrong and he is caught in all his lies and everyone will know it........another question is why are the grandparents (mine & his parents not allowed in the courtroom during the procedure) ....in a way I was offended by the judge asking them to leave

[logicalvelocity]

littleman,

patience is a virtue. Let your ex play the games. You have a strong stance, continue what you are doing.


Perhaps an option for you is to request to have a support deduction issue ordered. Once the order is in the system, FRO can chase your ex for support. It isn't a perfect system but it is all that is in place.

I am not sure why that particular Judge ordered the grandparents out of the court room. At your motion, you should have a different Judge. Maybe this Judge will allow same to be present. Is there any order in place that endorses the record to a closed court? Usually anyone can attend a hearing other than children. To me this would be inappropriate.

In regards to taking time off work and the issue of costs, see this case on the amount of costs awarded to a self represented litigant.

2004 CanLII 53230 (ON S.C.)
Citation: J.B.G. v. L.B., 2004 CanLII 53230 (ON S.C.)
Date: 2004-06-23
Docket: 01-FL-0040

http://www.canlii.org/on/cas/onsc/20...onsc11571.html

lv

[littleman]

lv

thanks soooo much very interesting read.......in portions felt like I was reading my life on paper........with this information Im under the impression that I should be asking for costs......of course I would never think of that much however if he keeps dragging this out I could........maybe I thought wrong that this would be straight forward.......that I would get all backdated extraordinary expenses paid back to me an adjustment in back support to be awarded based on the rental income he also recieves, a court order for support and sole custody whereas my child has lived with me on uniterrupted basis for the full time..........guess I thought wrong.........I dont know where I woudl be without finding this site and the helpful people here......your help LV has been immeasureable........should I be keeping a log of everything in regards to this situation? days off work etc.....I do keep & print his neverending emails........I guess at some point (if it ever gets there) they will be in my favour (some are nasty and as per that case you sent me trying to be controlling)

[Divorcemanagement]

when you get this close to litigation you can be a bundle of nerves. It's always a crapshoot and what you really need to do when you find you are becoming a nervous wreck is lay out all of your evidence on a table and lay out his - now compare the two - it helps!

[littleman]

funny

lay out his evidence.........he has nothing........I have only ever contacted him with respect to our child......whereas he contacts me to tell me what he thinks I shoudl be doing in life.......instead of aasking me what time I can be available for him to exercise his visitation he tells when he will do it.......just like care for our child for this month he told me verbatim "come next sunday (meaning the 30th of July) hes your responsibility not mine.........what is the difference of motion date and trial date........can everything be settled at a motion date

[logicalvelocity]

littleman,

keep a log of everything, even simple communication. This will help you to remember things concisely as they happened.

lv