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  • #16
    Originally posted by rockscan View Post
    Judges don�t nudge. If your ex cannot reasonable care for your kids then you need custody changed with full medical decision making to you.
    Maybe someone else can chime in on this.
    I have seen judges do it and it looked common place.
    Judge leans over the bench and says "you are going to pick up those kids on time".
    Judge puts in their decision "I have some concerns that party X may continue to obsess over their child", that is on the record.

    Originally posted by rockscan View Post
    2. final decision for the child that sleeps at my house every night.
    Full custody to you BUT your ex can fight for overnights with the child. Unless you have supervised access imposed on her, she can fight for overnights. Mental disability is not one that would be considered necessary for no overnights.
    There is no fight or discussion for parenting time or supervised access.
    I am so confused how people replying are making this about access / parenting time again.


    Originally posted by rockscan View Post
    Stop trying to leverage or reason. It is either she follows an updated order or not.
    I have read a regular theme here "you don't want to look bad in the judges eye." Character has an impression and I can show a pattern of them being not willing to comply with the court or with medical professionals.
    Am I wrong on that?


    Originally posted by rockscan View Post
    The others see you a certain way due to your posts. You are very combative and demanding in your posts.
    Correcting repeated untrue assertions and assumptions and disagreeing with your projections is not combative. What is the point of asking your opinions if you just make stuff up about what reality is? Maybe ask or be non-accusatory please.
    I just read another thread from OB1 about support and out of the blue someone accused him of being controlling. He was just asking a legal question about spousal.


    Originally posted by rockscan View Post
    Has she put a cigarette out in the child�s eye? That�s abuse that is criminal. Has she refused to put a band aid on a cut? Not so much? Should also note that this is your side of the story. Your ex could say you are a demanding, controlling asshole who criticizes everything they do and think you are the better parent. You should really temper yourself a bit rather than attacking people here. Would you call out a judge if they asked you the same? They will. Judges aren�t fuzzy teddy bears wanting to give hugs.
    You are sounding like a Karen. SMH

    That cigarette thing, was simple outrageous rhetoric and it wasn't directed at my ex. You couldn't not get that and went on a tangent. The rest of what you said, seriously SMH here.

    Comment


    • #17
      Originally posted by StillPaying View Post
      It's hard to argue ex is bad and shouldn't have custody, when they're the one booking and attending appointments. Why aren't you booking them if ex is so neglectful.
      I do book most of them and attend them. A ratio of 4:1
      Sometime I have to book because they just won't.

      They don't want us to go together so I offer phone or virtual conference for all appointments. If they don't want to go for an item and it feels right I ask for them to write their concerns so I can relay them to the medical practitioner in their words.

      Comment


      • #18
        Asking that the child stay every night at your house is parenting time. You are demanding that the child be at your house every night. If the current order says a certain schedule and you want to change that schedule it is parenting time.

        Comment


        • #19
          Originally posted by rockscan View Post
          Asking that the child stay every night at your house is parenting time. You are demanding that the child be at your house every night. If the current order says a certain schedule and you want to change that schedule it is parenting time.
          I did not ask or demand. They just do and have done so for more than 12 months
          One sleeps at my house every night, I just want final decision for that one.

          Comment


          • #20
            Youre still changing the final order and it still involves parenting time. By asking to have it set in an order with full decision making to you, you are requesting a change to custody and decision making. It doesn’t matter if that is what is happening, if it isn’t in the order, you have to have the order changed. Your ex could turn around and say they want the order followed. If they do, are you going to ignore it and be subjected to a “nudge” from a judge?

            Comment


            • #21
              Originally posted by rockscan View Post
              Youre still changing the final order and it still involves parenting time. By asking to have it set in an order with full decision making to you, you are requesting a change to custody and decision making. It doesn�t matter if that is what is happening, if it isn�t in the order, you have to have the order changed. Your ex could turn around and say they want the order followed. If they do, are you going to ignore it and be subjected to a �nudge� from a judge?
              Huh?
              I am asking for final decision. I am not asking for full decision making.
              Difference: consult and consideration vs unilateral. Legal wording I need.

              The term custody is no longer used. The term "decision making responsibility " is. I am open to corrections and clarifications on the legal terms.

              Access is what it is and if I file for the real life access to be reflected in the order and CS to change it is a big hill to climb for the ex to ask for substantial changes to the status quo now that money is involved. They have not and I don't see them doing that.

              Your "if" is flatly disagreeable quibbling. A non-issue here.


              Originally posted by podric View Post
              If I get a kid more than 60% of the time is getting final decision a sure thing?
              Change that to 90+%?

              What I hope for and what I am asking advice on:
              1. A judge nudging the ex in the right direction with a warning.
              2. final decision for the child that sleeps at my house every night.
              3. leverage the behavior of the ex for both children to get the above.
              4. have the order reflect the reality of what we do in real life. Why put a lie on paper?

              Comment

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