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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #161  
Old 04-06-2016, 08:55 PM
ninehundredt ninehundredt is offline
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How long took for OCL to wrap up a report? In our case took about 5 months

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Approximately 4 months. I applied in December of last year. They began the investigation in mid-January. The social worker has been very candid. I'm fairly confident she'll make an objective decision. Fingers crossed.
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  #162  
Old 04-06-2016, 08:57 PM
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May the force be with you

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  #163  
Old 04-30-2016, 02:00 PM
ninehundredt ninehundredt is offline
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Finally had the OCL disclosure meeting, and their recommendation is that I be granted sole custody of the children. I am still waiting on receiving the formal report document in the mail from their office in Toronto, but I anticipate it will arrive sometime next week.

In the meantime I've received an interim offer to settle from my ex's lawyer, that vaguely describes an access arrangement and vacation schedule for the summer months. I responded with a series of questions to address the ambiguous or missing points of the offer to settle. He responded with a minutes of settlement which addresses my questions.

The matter is scheduled to be spoken to this coming Monday, but I am hesitant to agree to these minutes of settlement. I want more than anything to have regular access restored with the kids, but the language of the minutes of settlement worries me. Based on the short time frame I have been unable to book time with my consulting lawyer until later next week.

At this point it seems like I've won a major battle in a long war, and I don't want to screw anything up this close to a resolution. Here's a link to a white-out copy of the minutes on this thread, could someone give me feedback?

https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B7...ThFRk1TQjlQQ1U

Last edited by ninehundredt; 04-30-2016 at 02:26 PM.
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  #164  
Old 04-30-2016, 02:28 PM
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Originally Posted by ninehundredt View Post
Finally had the OCL disclosure meeting, and their recommendation is that I be granted sole custody of the children. I am still waiting on receiving the formal report document in the mail from their office in Toronto, but I anticipate it will arrive sometime next week.

In the meantime I've received an interim offer to settle from my ex's lawyer, that vaguely describes an access arrangement and vacation schedule for the summer months. I responded with a series of questions to address the ambiguous or missing points of the offer to settle. He responded with a minutes of settlement which addresses my questions.

The matter is scheduled to be spoken to this coming Monday, but I am hesitant to agree to these minutes of settlement. I want more than anything to have regular access restored with the kids, but the language of the minutes of settlement worries me. Based on the short time frame I have been unable to book time with my consulting lawyer until later next week.

At this point it seems like I've won a major battle in a long war, and I don't want to screw anything up this close to a resolution. If I post a blacked-out copy of the minutes on this thread, could someone give me feedback?
Great news, what's OCL's explanation on their recommendation, why they recommended sole custody to father?
Don't buy into their offer, prepare a count offer based on OCL report with kids primary residence to father and mother having access every other weekend. They rush into a settlement because they want to close a deal faster, if you believe that you need more time ask the judge for an adjournment to properly prepare your offer and to consult with your lawyer, don't rush making a decision.

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  #165  
Old 04-30-2016, 02:46 PM
ninehundredt ninehundredt is offline
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Great news, what's OCL's explanation on their recommendation, why they recommended sole custody to father?

Don't buy into their offer, prepare a count offer based on OCL report with kids primary residence to father and mother having access every other weekend. They rush into a settlement because they want to close a deal faster, if you believe that you need more time ask the judge for an adjournment to properly prepare your offer and to consult with your lawyer, don't rush making a decision.

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They investigated over a few months, interviewing both parents, counselors, teachers, family members, police, FACS....etc. They also performed observations with both parents while the children were in their care.

The conclusion was that the mother intentionally fabricated allegations, continually made attempts to block any access with the children, and withheld information regarding their education and developmental progress. She basically has made every attempt to frustrate the relationship. None of her assertions could be verified / no evidence was found to back them up.

They stated that she has been unreasonable basically since the initial separation, whereas I've made every attempt to be reasonable and/or compromise. Because of this history of behavior, they feel I'm better suited to co-parent and make the important decisions regarding the children.

I'll make a white-out copy of the report available in this thread once I receive it. Could be helpful to other people to understand the process, or as a comparison to another investigation. I have heard good and bad things about OCL investigations, and it's certainly possible to have a bad experience of your social worker isn't doing their job properly.
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  #166  
Old 04-30-2016, 03:34 PM
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Originally Posted by ninehundredt View Post
They investigated over a few months, interviewing both parents, counselors, teachers, family members, police, FACS....etc. They also performed observations with both parents while the children were in their care.

The conclusion was that the mother intentionally fabricated allegations, continually made attempts to block any access with the children, and withheld information regarding their education and developmental progress. She basically has made every attempt to frustrate the relationship. None of her assertions could be verified / no evidence was found to back them up.

They stated that she has been unreasonable basically since the initial separation, whereas I've made every attempt to be reasonable and/or compromise. Because of this history of behavior, they feel I'm better suited to co-parent and make the important decisions regarding the children.

I'll make a white-out copy of the report available in this thread once I receive it. Could be helpful to other people to understand the process, or as a comparison to another investigation. I have heard good and bad things about OCL investigations, and it's certainly possible to have a bad experience of your social worker isn't doing their job properly.
Your social worker was a man or a woman?

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  #167  
Old 04-30-2016, 03:36 PM
ninehundredt ninehundredt is offline
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Your social worker was a man or a woman?

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My OCL social worker is a woman.
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  #168  
Old 04-30-2016, 05:12 PM
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arabian arabian is offline
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Congratulations!

What an awesome feeling you must be experiencing now.

Very wise of you to be careful about rushing into accepting anything. I'm sure people on here will have some great advice for you.

Too bad the mother can't be charged but then losing custody is going to be a big deal for her so I guess she will pay for it for the rest of her life.
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  #169  
Old 04-30-2016, 05:34 PM
ninehundredt ninehundredt is offline
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Congratulations!

What an awesome feeling you must be experiencing now.

Very wise of you to be careful about rushing into accepting anything. I'm sure people on here will have some great advice for you.

Too bad the mother can't be charged but then losing custody is going to be a big deal for her so I guess she will pay for it for the rest of her life.
Thanks for the kind words. I'm cautiously optimistic.
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  #170  
Old 04-30-2016, 10:19 PM
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Congratulations - I was actually reviewing this thread to see if I was giving proper advice and I saw on page 10 that I suggested you file for sole custody because what she was doing was grounds for you to get sole custody and I am happy OCL agreed.
Not tooting my horn but just seeing if I am on the ball when it comes to these things....

I think you SHOULD be cautiously optimistic.... You are over the peak now, enjoy the ride down!

I think you should ask for her to have supervised access for the first x months to make sure she doesn't try again to destroy your relationship with the kids. This is actually important, she will probably still try to destroy your relationship with the child(ren)

Make sure you impute income to her, she must pay you child support.

Also, if she is employed she needs to pay you spousal support because you will have the sole care of young children and that is a grounds for spousal support. I kid you not, spousal support is partially a salary to sole custody parents. The law is very clear.

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(b) apportion between the spouses any financial consequences arising from the care of any child of the marriage over and above any obligation for the support of any child of the marriage;
Are the dads on this forum undefeated?
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