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  • Prego - Off-set CS

    Ex wife is prego... Baby daddy might be in the wind, not sure.

    How will this affect my child support going forward when she takes a year of EI.

    I pay offset currently in the amount of $546.00 / month.

    Can I assume it's the new baby daddy's responsibility or am I screwed.

    She'll also be off her meds which is not good. She can barely handle life on them. Add another kid and no support she could lose it.

    Thanks

    FB

  • #2
    recent thread on this topic - CS question/recalc (by honestdad)

    Yikes - off her meds? No fun for you.

    Comment


    • #3
      F*** that was my fear.

      I've read similar case law. I'm going to do anything in my power to fight her on it... But I'd probably settle before a trial. I don't think she can afford a lawyer...

      That's one concern but being off her meds is definitely another. I'm very concerned for the kids. She couldn't hack it with me doing everything with our two kids she's not going to handle 3.

      Comment


      • #4
        That was pretty fast... no?

        Comment


        • #5
          Originally posted by FB_ View Post
          I'm going to do anything in my power to fight her on it... But I'd probably settle before a trial. I don't think she can afford a lawyer...
          Its only for a year at least, after that imputed to her regular income. I don't think you should bother. Instead agree that it is just for a year and then back to normal.

          Pregnancy the fastest way to riches.... for useless women (not implying all women are useless, just saying if you ARE useless then get pregnant so you get taken care of by others).

          Comment


          • #6
            Oh jeez - not a good situation, given FB_'s ex.

            Given that she has a documented record of cray-cray, would it be possible to put a bug in the ear of CAS - there's a baby on the way, the situation is unstable, might not be a bad idea to have a social worker hanging around the hospital when the new baby arrives to get mom and baby on the social services radar. Family members of mine had to do this with a relative - someone who was not mentally stable enough to have another child, but did so anyway - and CAS stayed involved with the mom and baby from the get-go (end up apprehending the child, but that's another story). Giving birth is actually a good entry point for social services - they can do some assessments when mom is in the hospital, much easier than having to go and find her once she's left.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by Links17 View Post
              Its only for a year at least, after that imputed to her regular income. I don't think you should bother. Instead agree that it is just for a year and then back to normal.

              Pregnancy the fastest way to riches.... for useless women (not implying all women are useless, just saying if you ARE useless then get pregnant so you get taken care of by others).
              You're probably right. 10 hours of lawyer time.

              Comment


              • #8
                Originally posted by stripes View Post
                Oh jeez - not a good situation, given FB_'s ex.

                Given that she has a documented record of cray-cray, would it be possible to put a bug in the ear of CAS - there's a baby on the way, the situation is unstable, might not be a bad idea to have a social worker hanging around the hospital when the new baby arrives to get mom and baby on the social services radar. Family members of mine had to do this with a relative - someone who was not mentally stable enough to have another child, but did so anyway - and CAS stayed involved with the mom and baby from the get-go (end up apprehending the child, but that's another story). Giving birth is actually a good entry point for social services - they can do some assessments when mom is in the hospital, much easier than having to go and find her once she's left.
                That is my main concern. I see another hospital visit in her future. She had me to do most of the work and support her with our two kids. I do not see it going well trying to do it on her own. All I can do is be there for my kids like the last time I had to take them for 6 weeks straight

                I have no idea if the father is around or not but I don't think he is...If she even knows who it is.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Links17 View Post
                  Its only for a year at least, after that imputed to her regular income. I don't think you should bother. Instead agree that it is just for a year and then back to normal.

                  Pregnancy the fastest way to riches.... for useless women (not implying all women are useless, just saying if you ARE useless then get pregnant so you get taken care of by others).
                  A key part of getting an agreement (with good language) is that it is stronger than getting a judgement because you can word so that even she comes up with some sort of "semi-valid" reason for not working again you can have the proper wording to cut that off.

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                  • #10
                    That's funny. I was just wondering how things were going in your situation, since I was catching up on some posts, and saw who had been posting lately, and who was not.

                    I guess you'll be posting a lot shortly. Not a fun situation during pregnancy.

                    The offset will only be affected during mat leave. Not great, but make it clear that any adjustment is temporary. Has she raised this with you yet?

                    Comment


                    • #11
                      Originally posted by dad2bandm View Post
                      That's funny. I was just wondering how things were going in your situation, since I was catching up on some posts, and saw who had been posting lately, and who was not.

                      I guess you'll be posting a lot shortly. Not a fun situation during pregnancy.

                      The offset will only be affected during mat leave. Not great, but make it clear that any adjustment is temporary. Has she raised this with you yet?
                      I heard from my son... They went to an ultrasound and saw the baby in mommy's belly.

                      Comment


                      • #12
                        Originally posted by FB_ View Post
                        I heard from my son... They went to an ultrasound and saw the baby in mommy's belly.
                        Good grief. How do some parents just get it so wrong, wrong. wrong.
                        Start a discussion, not a fire. Post with kindness.

                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by mcdreamy View Post
                          Good grief. How do some parents just get it so wrong, wrong. wrong.
                          On so many different levels as well.. I don't get it, but it's not my life.

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Oh boy. I remember your story and what you and your children have gone through FB.

                            I think the other members have it right in that it'll be more cost effective to just suck up the adjustment for a year while she's on mat leave rather than paying lawyers to fight it.

                            I have a feeling you'll be spending a lot more time with your two children though, so something good may still come of this.

                            My condolences.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Strangely enough, I'm thinking you may want to treat these as two separate problems.

                              Problem 1 - while on mat leave, her income will decrease. As case law (stupidly in my opinion) shows, it's apparently reasonable to do this. But she has a job so she'll get EI, and her job may even top that up some? Hopefully the year won't be too financially painful.

                              Problem 2 - she's off her meds and her behaviour and parenting will suffer. You could offer to take the children extra time if she's finding looking after them too stressful. Has this started already? I'm assuming that she's off the meds while pregnant, and will stay off them longer if she breastfeeds. Maybe you could even 'generously' offer to take the children over 60% of the time, but not ask for CS from her during her mat leave year.

                              And I agree, it's not very reasonable for you to have found out from your son. She's probably stressed out about it too though, especially if it's something she didn't do on purpose.

                              Comment

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