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  • Exclusive possession of contents of the home????

    Not only did my ex go for exclsuive possession of the home she wants contents also.

    How common is this and why? Wouldn't it make her seem greedy and vindictive? I have the clothes on my back only and she wants even more?

    Will she get this?

  • #2
    When and by whom were the home and contents purchased?

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    • #3
      Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
      When and by whom were the home and contents purchased?

      We have been married for 12 years. 99% of the contents we purchased together. The house is a matrimonial home.

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      • #4
        Did you buy the home together? Did one of you own it before you got married?

        If you bought everything together I can't see how she would get everything without some kind of equalization payment. Is she offering to buy you out of the home?

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        • #5
          Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
          Did you buy the home together? Did one of you own it before you got married?

          If you bought everything together I can't see how she would get everything without some kind of equalization payment. Is she offering to buy you out of the home?

          We bought the home together while married. She's not offering anything. She wants it all with no payment claiming it belogs to her. I think she is unclear of the laws or her lawyer made promises he can't keep. My worry is the contents. Why does she want exclsuinve possession of my personal stuff? Clothes, shavers etc.?

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          • #6
            If that's what she's asking for then I doubt you have much to worry about. She would have to have a really good reason for wanting absolutely everything and even then the courts would be unlikely to award it to her. Really, what would she ever do with your clothes and personal effects??

            Did she give any reason for wanting everything? Do you have and exorbitant amount of debt and maybe she thinks she can offset it that way?

            Sounds to me like either a miscommunication or she got some really bad information from her lawyer.

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            • #7
              Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
              If that's what she's asking for then I doubt you have much to worry about. She would have to have a really good reason for wanting absolutely everything and even then the courts would be unlikely to award it to her. Really, what would she ever do with your clothes and personal effects??

              Did she give any reason for wanting everything? Do you have and exorbitant amount of debt and maybe she thinks she can offset it that way?

              Sounds to me like either a miscommunication or she got some really bad information from her lawyer.

              She is vindictive and has done other things to "hurt' or "bleed" me. We are not in debt of any serious needs. I don't know why she asked. She's getting pretty nasty so I suspect it's a "bleed" tactic since I literally have the clothes off my back.

              I am worried that she does get it. What does that mean? She gets to keep the contents??

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              • #8
                That is ridiculous. All assets, debts are to be divided equally. Contents of the marital home do not fall under the special rules for the marital home.

                Seriously, she couldn't let you have a couple of towels, a fork, knife spoon and bowl to eat out of? Maybe a blanket to keep you warm? WTF???

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                • #9
                  How exactly is it that you're out of the home with nothing? If the home belongs to both of you then either go get some things or better yet, move back in. She has zero legal grounds to keep you out of the marital home unless you abuse or threaten her, then she has a right to protect herself.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by blinkandimgone View Post
                    How exactly is it that you're out of the home with nothing? If the home belongs to both of you then either go get some things or better yet, move back in. She has zero legal grounds to keep you out of the marital home unless you abuse or threaten her, then she has a right to protect herself.
                    No she calls the polioce constantly on frivilous thngs. She wants me out and I was advised by a few cops it would be better if I move out. They said she has the upper hand and if she alleges an assault or threat they will have to arrest me just on her word.

                    This is a bit much for me and my children so I moved out. The police made it clear it will be a long shot she gets charged and very good odds she will eventually get me charged if I stay so I left for everyone's sanity. The cops coming every night is not good for the children nor fair to te neigbors.

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                    • #11
                      Have you filed for custody of the kids, even joint custody
                      You have made the biggest mistake in family law if you haven`t. You NEED to have access to your kids and it sounds like she may have been building her case for sole custody by getting you out of the house.

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                      • #12
                        Rather than allowing her to call the Police bring them with you to accompany you. Advise her in advance of when you are coming. Bring a video camera and use it. Take video of everything in the home and take any personal belongings you wish. Take video of her response if she refuses.

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                        • #13
                          I was just wondering about the exact wording.... are you sure it didn't read something more like:
                          "exclusive possession of the contents of the residence pending final resolution of ownership thereof"
                          ...that does not mean that the person is claiming all the contents. It means they are asking for possession of them until they are divided properly and fairly so that the other party does not clean the place out and leave kids sleeping on the floor or go and sell all the appliances, etc...
                          It would make more sense to me if the above is what her lawyer was actually saying.

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by danzuchy View Post
                            No she calls the polioce constantly on frivilous thngs. She wants me out and I was advised by a few cops it would be better if I move out. They said she has the upper hand and if she alleges an assault or threat they will have to arrest me just on her word.

                            This is a bit much for me and my children so I moved out. The police made it clear it will be a long shot she gets charged and very good odds she will eventually get me charged if I stay so I left for everyone's sanity. The cops coming every night is not good for the children nor fair to te neigbors.
                            The police can't give legal advice. Notwithstanding that, they gave you absolutely horrible advice for you. All they did was do what they could to make their job easier by leaning on the person who they felt more likely to break/capitulate.

                            You made the horrible mistake of listening to the police and not protecting yourself and your interests. I mean, you did have a digital voice recorder running at all times while in the house to protect yourself from a false DV claim didn't you? You did only communicate with her on matters relating to the children? You did try and take 99% of all other communication to email where it would be admissible?

                            If you didn't take those steps, sorry to say, you made your bed. You failed to take the necessary precautions to protect yourself from a false DV claim, you allowed the police to effectively bully you into leaving because they wanted to try and take the path of least resistance.

                            Unless she has an exclusive possession order, I would move my butt right back in and become a full time parent again. I would email the ex of my intentions to re-establish myself in the house as it in the children's best interests. Before I moved back in I would buy a digital voice recorder and have it on 100% of the time while in the house to protect myself from a false DV claim. Download it each night to a secure computer in a room with a lock on the door that only you have a key to (or better yet, your work or buddies computer where she has 0 ability to get her hands on it destroy it).

                            Will she get 100% of everything? Depends on whether you bend over and take it again. You reply to her motion stating you want to move back in, or alternatively, items to allow yourself to maintain a separate household and all of your personal belongings (which would be entirely reasonable).

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Originally posted by HammerDad View Post
                              The police can't give legal advice. Notwithstanding that, they gave you absolutely horrible advice for you. All they did was do what they could to make their job easier by leaning on the person who they felt more likely to break/capitulate.

                              You made the horrible mistake of listening to the police and not protecting yourself and your interests. I mean, you did have a digital voice recorder running at all times while in the house to protect yourself from a false DV claim didn't you? You did only communicate with her on matters relating to the children? You did try and take 99% of all other communication to email where it would be admissible?

                              If you didn't take those steps, sorry to say, you made your bed. You failed to take the necessary precautions to protect yourself from a false DV claim, you allowed the police to effectively bully you into leaving because they wanted to try and take the path of least resistance.

                              Unless she has an exclusive possession order, I would move my butt right back in and become a full time parent again. I would email the ex of my intentions to re-establish myself in the house as it in the children's best interests. Before I moved back in I would buy a digital voice recorder and have it on 100% of the time while in the house to protect myself from a false DV claim. Download it each night to a secure computer in a room with a lock on the door that only you have a key to (or better yet, your work or buddies computer where she has 0 ability to get her hands on it destroy it).

                              Will she get 100% of everything? Depends on whether you bend over and take it again. You reply to her motion stating you want to move back in, or alternatively, items to allow yourself to maintain a separate household and all of your personal belongings (which would be entirely reasonable).


                              LOL. Your advice will get 80% of men arrested. You think the cops actually will stop, listen to your 'tapes' and then do the proper thing?

                              Fantasy land.

                              here's a more typical example of cops:
                              A Fathers Nightmare

                              Comment

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