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tilt · #11 08-01-2020, 06:48 PM

He sounds like a winner; parent who choose not to see their kids get no respect from me. Keep a calendar of all access visits, and backdate back to the date of you moving cities by cross referimg txts or emails. Judges love seeing the pattern of parents suddenly wanting to see their kids when a court date is coming up. Have you filed a cross motion requesting retro Sec7? Are you getting his return/NOA every year? If he is going to nickel and dime you then it is only fair that there be full disclosure.

1. Don�t get a letter from your doctor, get an affidavit from them, have your doctor document how long exactly you can drive for and what accommodations you need.

2. Hardship is hard to prove, have either of you re-partnered? Because it compares household to household, including the partner�s income/payment of CS and SS. If you are just comparing $120k paying $13,000 CS and having some access costs v $60,000 getting $13,000 but paying all childcare and having some access costs (you said you drove sometimes)...well, I think it is a stretch for your ex to assume they will win. Especially if you have documentation that shows you were moving as a family and the ex reneged.

3. I would define the access, you have been very flexible and your reward is to be walked over. Specific dates gives more structure and certainty to you and your child�s life. If you agree to 72 hours notice you will never be able to make plans more than three days in advance and might be accused of denying access. Plus, school is coming up in the next few years and you won�t have much flexibility anyway. S7 should be proportionate and retro paid in full (include what you pay your employer each year in benefit premiums). When your ex comes into town they are also visiting their own family, right? So the trip isn�t just for access. So 50% mileage reimbursed up to a defined amount each month (start the offer at $100) within 30 days of receipts being provided.

Your initial offer is way too generous and you are painting yourself into a corner. Let your ex come back with a more reasonable offer. I doubt this would go to trial, their legal fees would be a minimum of $35,000 and it is not anything close to being clearly in their favour. You guys won�t see the inside of a courtroom for a while and the lawyer will do a cost-benefit analysis and just want this settled. Don�t be scared of trials or lawyers. Good luck!

StillPaying · #12 08-02-2020, 12:32 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tilt

He sounds like a winner; parent who choose not to see their kids get no respect from me. Keep a calendar of all access visits, and backdate back to the date of you moving cities by cross referimg txts or emails. Judges love seeing the pattern of parents suddenly wanting to see their kids when a court date is coming up.

Not sure if this is the case. She moved child 500km away and he's been driving the biweekly access, with her doing half driving on holidays.

Quote:

Have you filed a cross motion requesting retro Sec7? Are you getting his return/NOA every year? If he is going to nickel and dime you then it is only fair that there be full disclosure.

If this goes to court, hopefully she asked for s7, but I'm not sure where he's trying to nickle and dime her. He's saying he has lots of bills and can't afford full support plus 100% of access costs.

Quote:

1. Dont get a letter from your doctor, get an affidavit from them, have your doctor document how long exactly you can drive for and what accommodations you need.

True, but this can also be used against you. You're doing some driving, your offer includes driving, then you show a letter saying you can't drive.

Quote:

So 50% mileage reimbursed up to a defined amount each month (start the offer at $100) within 30 days of receipts being provided.

Your initial offer is way too generous and you are painting yourself into a corner. Let your ex come back with a more reasonable offer.

Should she offer $100 or not?
There are obvious costs each visit, so hopefully they can agree on an amount without the need of receipts. (Discount should be contingent on each visit though) She agrees gas is $200 and is offering no more for 4 nights stay.

$100 off seems like a deal to me, of course court could mean you pay nothing. Then in negotiations I would be prepared to go up to 300, half of what he's asking for to help avoid court costs.
Then S7, I would keep at 66%, and start claiming child care.

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