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  #1  
Old 10-11-2018, 11:25 AM
Just a Mom Just a Mom is offline
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Hi there. I just joined the forum and have been really interested in the comments. I have a 8 year old boy that I have been raising alone since he was 2 when his dad passed away. I met someone who has a 6 year old boy and we have moved in together now. He was only separated and has been getting the divorce now but his ex is angry at my son because he is older and the boys sometimes fight when they are playing. She is now keeping his son away from him and its not nice. I am looking forward to getting to know you all.
Mary
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  #2  
Old 10-11-2018, 02:36 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Your partners ex cant withhold the child for that reason and I hope your partner tells her she cant do that. If the kid was getting beat up at school would she keep him home?

You should also make an effort to look at your sons behaviour and try to stop the fighting. I get it that boys fight and brothers are always at each other. Unfortunately because your partners ex is being difficult it creates a problem for you.

Have him remind the ex that this denial of access and he won’t allow it. He should continue to pick kid up for his time and ignore her bs.
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Old 10-11-2018, 03:34 PM
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CoolGuy41 CoolGuy41 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Your partners ex cant withhold the child for that reason
In practice she totally can because nobody enforces parenting time and if it went to court she may be able to as well since being bullied is not in her child's interest. The Devil is in the details.

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and I hope your partner tells her she cant do that.
Gee, I wonder if he has tried that.

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If the kid was getting beat up at school would she keep him home?
Changing schools because of bullies is not unheard of.
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Old 10-11-2018, 04:28 PM
Just a Mom Just a Mom is offline
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He has gotten a new lawyer now and it is going to court because she keeps trying to turn their son against his dad. My son isn't beating him up. They bicker over video games sometimes. Its not physical. They usually get along, but when they play videogames they argue and his son is younger and gets angry and frustrated that he doesn't win the games. He is just little. His son has started saying things like "his mom thinks im ugly" or bad things to my son about his dad dying. That has been really upsetting to me and to my son.
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  #5  
Old 10-11-2018, 04:34 PM
standing on the sidelines standing on the sidelines is offline
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put away the video games when the child is there. Dad should be doing things with his child during this difficult time instead of parking him in front of a tv.

I take it your new partner was already living on his own before you and he moved in together?
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Old 10-11-2018, 09:10 PM
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Janus Janus is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Just a Mom View Post
He has gotten a new lawyer now and it is going to court because she keeps trying to turn their son against his dad.
Hopefully your partner has a better reason than that, because alienation is hard to prove. Something along the lines of "I'm an awesome parent as shown by X, Y and Z so it is in the best interests of the child to spend at least 50% of his time with me".

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My son isn't beating him up. They bicker over video games sometimes. Its not physical. They usually get along, but when they play videogames they argue and his son is younger and gets angry and frustrated that he doesn't win the games. He is just little.
I agree with SoS, put the video games on hiatus until this matter is cleaned up. Start playing board games, or going on hikes, reading books, or something else.

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His son has started saying things like "his mom thinks im ugly" or bad things to my son about his dad dying. That has been really upsetting to me and to my son.
If you are getting offended by an 6-year old, that's an issue with you, not with the 6-year old. You are the adult, and the kid is facing a stressful situation. You don't get to have hurt feelings here.

If your son is getting offended, let him know that other kid is going through a stressful change, and that he is little and doesn't mean what he says. Your son has had stability and consistent messaging his whole life. Think of this as a good teaching experience for your son: a time to develop empathy for others who may not be in the same situation as you.
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Old 10-11-2018, 09:52 PM
kate331 kate331 is offline
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There are always growing pains in a blended family. Dad really needs to step in and nip this behaviour in the butt, especially about your child's Dad dying.

I agree with the other posters, why is a 6 year old playing video games on his precious parenting time, if its causing conflict?
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