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  • help with motion

    My boyfriend found out his ex who has sole custody is an alcoholic and the police have been to their house 5 times in the last 4 months. CAS has been to interview everyone and my boyfriend has spoken to the police and CAS about whats going on. The police verified that they were called by his ex as she was drunk and arguing with her boyfriend. The children age 11 and 14 have witness everything thats been going on. My boyfriend only found out when his mother in law called him to tell him so he would protect the children because she has tried everything in her power to help her daughter. CAS has been there twice since the police have been there and the second time came because the boyfriend called them as he is fed up with her and has told the children they have to leave, they live together in his home. CAS has said that the children are willing to live with him, and we are out of town, and of course we want the children. We have been speaking with the children and we just found out that they have been in the car with her driving when she has been drinking many times. they also told us that she has been like this for years but the mother told them not to tell us what was going on. His ex has been to rehab for 3 days only, and to programs for alcoholism. According to the kids she is now in a program because cas told her that if she didnt seek treatment they would remove the children.

    My boyfriend has motion without notice ready for when she starts drinking again which is inevitable, but he was going to file a motion for joint custody with him the custodial parent or sole custody.

    CAS has told him to go to court. Duty counsel has told us thats because their threshold of what is acceptable is much higher than what a parents or a judge would be. Everyone seems on his side in this and is encouraging him to go to court.

    My question is what should he do? We cant get anything in writing from CAS or the police. If he puts the motion forward he will be asking for file disclosure from the police and CAS. His ex denies everything to him including that shes an alcoholic even though she now takes the child to aa meetings. And she claims her relationship is better than ever. OMG scary thought how bad it was before. This whole thing is making me sick to my stomach. these poor kids and what they have had to endure. My boyfriend lost custody because he didnt recieve notice to appear in court because he moved. Fraud on her part. Should he get character references? he is a gentle person who has been steamrolled and broken by his ex. He has delayed doing anything at this point because he did not want to disrupt their lives and uproot them. She continues to withold the children and deny visitation and as my boyfriend works shiftwork scheduling is difficult as she is uncooperative.

    If she wasnt an alcoholic he was going to motion for joint custody but since she is showing herself to be an unfit parent should he file for sole custody?
    Or should he wait until something happens again and remove the children when they call him and file an emergency motion?

    Could she retain sole custody if we go in front of a judge even if she is an alcoholic? Thats our fear, that with everything happening and everyone involved that nothing changes and she will just get worse in witholding the children. We have to fight for everytime he sees his kids. He is so stressed about his kids and so am i. So scared for them. pls any advice is greatly appreciated

  • #2
    Did CAS or police verify yet if children are in risk of harm? If so, then you need to obtain CAS summary report which you can obtain only with her signature or a court order. At this point, I don't think a Judge will do anything without an independent third party investigation/report.

    Even if you can get that summary, she can argue that the investigation is not completed and there is no emergency.

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    • #3
      Originally posted by Ineedhelp View Post
      Or should he wait until something happens again and remove the children when they call him and file an emergency motion?
      that something might be a call from the coroners office

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      • #4
        Ask the police for the file# from when they responded to her residence. The judge can order the records to see what transpired.

        If the kids are 11 and 14 then they are old enough (at least the 14 year old is) to make their wishes known. If the kids want to live with you, the 14 year old is a lock, and the 11 year old will likely also be (given that they don't like splitting siblings up).

        Get a court order for the summary report/police report and file for emergency custody.

        Comment

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