Should I go to court?

[blinkandimgone]

Don't project your motives onto everyone else's situation.

The best interests of the child should prevail and if it doesn't work out to be in her best interest then it shouldn't be happening. End of story.

[jaysneed]

Don't project your motives onto everyone else's situation.

The best interests of the child should prevail and if it doesn't work out to be in her best interest then it shouldn't be happening. End of story.

So question did the mother ask the child if it would be a problem for her to travel 1 hr to school when she is with daddy?

Than come talk to me about the best interest of the child. If everyone was looking out for the best interest of their children, they sure don't show it. Instead of asking other people about what they think is your child's best interest why don't you ask your child yourself.

[jaysneed]

If someone is paying high in CS it is obvious that they want the best for their child. Who would work hard for their kids just to see less for their children. It does have to question how you spend the money because before separation everyone was living comfortable. So why do I continue to work hard to provide for my child what I provided before separation to see them in second hand clothes when not the Custodial parent shops there for themselves. it isn't like she needs all these high end clothes for herself, SHE DOESN'T WORK.

[blinkandimgone]

It is not in the best interets of the child to hand her adult decisions to make, that's just foolish.

So you're saying that only people who are paying a high amount of money have the best interest of their children in mind? Stop crapping up everyone else's threads with your continual nonsense about your dollar's worth of daycare and second hand clothes. Instead of hijacking everyone else's threads why don't you start your own???

[billiechic]

Jaysneed, you are not going to convince anyone else to think the way you do. If you feel your kids should be in brand new clothes, that is your perogative. We don't have to agree..that is between your ex and you and hardly worth discussing anymore.

[Amanda2]

Seems I missed some excitement here. Thank you all for your contructive positive points of view.

Jaysneed:

I'm sorry you are so bitter. It must take alot of energy to carry around all that hate. I bought a house last year with my boyfriend. I don't care if he has moved in with his girlfriend. Our daughter seems to like her and that is all that matters to me. Seriously, do you think I am going to ask a 3 1/2 yearold to make her own life decisions? What is my role as a parent then? This is why we went to a children's cousellor of his chosing so they could tell us what we should be doing. I am going by what she told us after hearing both sides. My ex pays an offset amount of CS based on my income. He also does not have to pay childcare expenses because I work from home. We also did not adjust our CS when his income went from 100000 a year to 140000.
That said I don't think this is about money for EITHER of us.
And just so we are clear his hours don't actually permit him to drop her off at the school, he has a goverment job with set hours - he will be dropping her off at my home so she can spend anoth 45 minutes travelling on the bus.(each way) Let's do the math 2 hours back and forth to his house. Then 1.5 hours on the bus = 3.5 hours a day.

One final note Jaysneed. Do you know what the best thing you can give your child is? A happy, well adjusted parent.

[jaysneed]

Call it whatever you want, when you lose all rights to your child for no apparent reasons and everything is based on lies that has never had any proof to and only hear say, then come put yourself in my shoes. I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. At least you get to see your child more than 4 times a month and you don't have to make the best of it each time, shouldn't I be living comfortable as well with my daughter. I can't even call to say goodnight, let alone find out how she hurts herself. My daughter got hurt at daycare in April 2009 and it took them until now to disclose that information. How would you feel then, waiting 1 year you find out what happened? And not hearing it from the Daycare themselves, only to have their lawyers disclose the information. How would you feel, wouldn't you feel like a criminal for no reason at all? Only because my lawyer didn't file something I relied on her to do. and didn't show up to my Case conference because a family emergency.All that is because of my negligence as a parent? How could 3 years be justified. It isn't right and it shouldn't happen to anyone else.

To everyone who is struggling to see your children and is a continuous battle in litigation's my main advice is to represent yourself because lawyers in this country make money off the destruction of families and relationships between your children. They know parents who care will continue to fight to see their children. We need to be the voices of our children and stop this. It took both our decisions to create and sometimes not, to create a child. It is both the Mother's and Father's decision's, it should be fair for both parents and no one no matter if they were a bad wife/husband should suffer from seeing their children if they want to. It didn't take a Judge to decide if you two should have children or even conceived for you. Why do we leave it to someone who doesn't even know what your child's best interest are.
Don't just suck it up, if you feel it isn't right, look up on the internet, research child abuse, the court abuse, research the affects of everything that isn't right and see the causes it has on your children. Everyone seems to think that children can't see or hear but they see everything. They know the truth. It is time to put your children first and set aside your feelings.

If what I am saying about spending habits isn't right then why in the United States, mainly Florida, have issued to support recipient's Master Cards so that support payer can see how the money is being spent because when you were a couple you decided and maintained a budget for the child. So your Car Loan payments and hair care needs are not allowed to be spent using the CS.
I think that Canada should start implementing these laws. Then there would be no conflict.

[blinkandimgone]

And you think for some reason after crapping all over everyone else's threads whining about your coffee money being spent on daycare and accusing people who dress their kids in second hand clothing as being negligent and abusive parents is going to suddenly get everyone to see things your way and symapathize with you.

You've been asked to start your own thread numerous time in more than one thread and you still return to spew your vile, bitter posts at everyone who has the gall to disagree with you. You're taking out your anger on everyone else.

Maybe you should stop focussing so much on the past and how your ex wife is living her life, focus on the future and being happy. I suspect you're most angry that she is choosing to be happy and go on with her life - without you. You're determined to be miserable and trying to draw everyone around you into it - misery loves company as they say and it seems to be that the more you fail at that the angrier you get.

Pretty much every post you've made at this board has been angry, nasty, rude, whiney and self absorbed. The world is not out to get you, in fact, nobody even really cares but you. Why don't you do the world a favour, take a step back, analyze your life and figure out how to inject some POSITIVE measures into it instead of surrounding yourself with negativity. Get counselling if you need it but do something other than bitch at everyone here who has been gracious enough to offer you some solid advice and experienced perspective.

[Amanda2]

Well said blinkandimgone.

[blinkandimgone]

Thank you, Amanda. I meant to say I thought your post was very poignant, especially the last part.

[logicalvelocity]

jaysneed,

You're not going too get to much sympathy stepping all over someones thread. Please start your own.