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  • #16
    Originally posted by standing on the sidelines View Post
    here is a website you can go to and talk to other parents of preemie babies.
    You've been an amazing help and ease to my mind, I can't express my gratitude enough. Thank you so so much.

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    • #17
      Very good and thought out response blinkandimgone. Common sense, and right now it should be all about the baby and what is best. Best of luck.

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      • #18
        Why thank you! I wonder how she's progressing....i feel like a worried mom, lol.

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        • #19
          She seems to have it together. Praise to her.

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          • #20
            Just a slight update for some of you, I did contact the father last night by phone call. Left a message that it was important he return my call as soon as possible (I'm not the type to explain a bad situation over a voice mail) That was about 1030pm. I received a text message response today of "Personally Olivia, I really thought you wernt gonna talk 2 me anymore, and I liked it that way"
            Yea by me not talking to him it was about the three month no contact we had since he kept pressuring for me to abort. Conveniently forgot we were supposed to be meeting on Monday to discuss things. So right now I've just thrown my hands up and given up. My reply wasn't nice and was a little harsh and right now I don't regret it, likely because I am so wore out. lol
            "Fine, congratulations on being a dead beat father and an ignorant fool. I only tried to continue to keep you informed and active in this for our daughters sake. I see now you are just blissful in being a coward and immature. Hope you've done your family proud and it's so nice to see you truly are just a selfish jerk"
            Harsh yea, did I sink to his level? Likely but right now I just don't care about his feelings.


            Also blinkandimgone I am doing okay, tired and worried but okay. Ava is doing really good right now and as long as I don't go into labor tonight or tomorrow then I find out more on Monday. I did find out from the doctor this morning that I will be hospitalized until I have her which could be anytime within now and the next month. I've got both my steroid shots and now it is just a hurry up and wait thing... the longer the wait the happier I am.
            Sorry if anyone has a problem with this message and it's length... just needed to get some stuff off my chest and well if you didn't like it you didn't have to read it :P

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            • #21
              Of course he liked it better that way. Out of sight, out of mind. While he continues on with his free life, you decided to keep your baby. Don't expect more from him. As much as you would like for a relationship for them, don't force it. I would have just given some basic info on the new situation and if he chooses to ignore then you did your part.
              You are going to have to put him aside and keep focused on your health right now! You don't need any extra stress from him and your situation, it will not be the healthiest decision right now especially in your current situation.
              Don't let him take away your experience of being pregnant and having this baby arrive safe. Enjoy and hope all goes well.

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              • #22
                And don't worry about him. His parents one day will find out about your situation and probably scold him for not telling them. He is just a coward and to text that to you, just proved it.

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                • #23
                  I would suggest doing your best to keep things civil, although I know it's hard to resist the temptation to be snarky sometimes! Just send him one last text or email, since that's apparently his preferred method of communication, letting him know that you're in hospital because the baby is coming sooner than expected and that you'll be informing his parents soon so they can be part of their granddaughter's life from the beginning if they wish. So if he wants to do anything about either, the ball is in his court. Indicate that unless he replies, you will not be contacting him any further, as per his wishes. Then you know you have done all you could, and concentrate on the matter at hand. Or utero.

                  Good luck!

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                  • #24
                    Glad to hear you're doing ok, and the baby too. Sorry that you didn't get the response you'd hoped from him. Not a lot you can do about that, I agree on the being civil, although it can be hard and we all reach our limits sometimes. You should feel comfort in knowing that you did the right thing by telling him, and focus on yourself and the baby. The rest is in his hands.

                    Enjoy the last remaining child free time you have to it's fullest, enjoy your child when she arrives. The best revenge you can have is to be happy. And perhaps to send a 'congrats gramma and grampa!' card to his parents

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                    • #25
                      lol I'm not even worrying about it anymore, only reason my last message to hime was pretty much 100% different than the usual me is b.c I haven't slept in who knows how many days and just kinda said f-it. Even though it was below me I just have more important things on my plate right now. Oh and Rioe I am planning on sending him one last message once the baby is here, no point having more added stress til my body can handle it without risking it hurting the baby. I can't make him grow up and stop acting like a child but what I can do is make sure that no matter what he decides my daughter grows up knowing she is loved and wanted. I think that's all I can do for now;
                      Thanks for all the support and comments, as always they are greatly appreciated.

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                      • #26
                        I regularly send my ex short, simple informative emails, which I know she won't respond to or remember, so that at least I have a record of trying to be co-operative and to keep her informed. If a child is sick, or there is a school meeting, or a recital etc. She never acknowledges, never seems to remember and I don't actually know if she reads them. Fairly often I get a snarky complaint about why I didn't tell her about such and such, and I just send a quick response quoting the original email I sent several weeks before.

                        Don't get hung up on it, don't take it personally, don't feel anything at all, just send a weekly "news update" and don't expect a reply. If you have his parent's email address, send a cc to them.

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                        • #27
                          I love the name you chose, by the way! Olivia & Ava - very pretty!

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                          • #28
                            Originally posted by Mess View Post
                            I regularly send my ex short, simple informative emails, which I know she won't respond to or remember, so that at least I have a record of trying to be co-operative and to keep her informed. If a child is sick, or there is a school meeting, or a recital etc. She never acknowledges, never seems to remember and I don't actually know if she reads them. Fairly often I get a snarky complaint about why I didn't tell her about such and such, and I just send a quick response quoting the original email I sent several weeks before.

                            Don't get hung up on it, don't take it personally, don't feel anything at all, just send a weekly "news update" and don't expect a reply. If you have his parent's email address, send a cc to them.
                            Great idea !

                            hope you all have a good night, I'm finally dragging my butt to dream land and stopping the horrible typo's lol

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                            • #29
                              I'd just like to quickly say thank you again to dadtotheend;mess; blinkandimgone; tugofwar; standing on the sidelines. Your advice and opinions that have been expressed on both of my threads have been truly helpful and enlightening. I know you all have different reasons for being on here but I would just like to say thanks again for helping me through everything so far. You've all been amazing help and it means a lot.

                              Blinkandimgone I just thought I'd update again for you and anyone else who would like to know, baby is still very happy, content and showing every sign of being as strong willed as her mama. Doctors aren't for seeing any immediate issues arising so I'll know more by Monday evening.

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                              • #30
                                Originally posted by mama2bee View Post
                                "Fine, congratulations on being a dead beat father and an ignorant fool. I only tried to continue to keep you informed and active in this for our daughters sake. I see now you are just blissful in being a coward and immature. Hope you've done your family proud and it's so nice to see you truly are just a selfish jerk"
                                You a fool for that. Then again you are young.

                                Now Whip Your Hair Back and Forth. But go easy, you're with child
                                Last edited by dadtotheend; 11-14-2010, 08:36 AM.

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