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  • Separation ex-spouse not working

    So...I married my ex 9 years ago. We have 2 kids 4 &6. I earn over 100K with pension, while she currently earns nothing with a sore neck from an accident last month after the separation date.

    We agree on 50/50...but thats it.

    She wants full CS at $1600/month; And $500/month SS for 7 years. Plus she wants the 50% of 9 years pension and oh ya the house.

    I offered the house if she dropped the pension; $800/month CS as its 50/50 and $1200/month SS for 7 years.

    The mediator stated this situation is more financial vs compassionate; as
    i took 18 months off for my kids when they were born; did 50% of the chores around the home; did 100% of repairs and was with the kids when she was working PT a few years back.

    Currently, she walked out on the separation negotiation to travel back to her home country for 2 months; leaving me with the kids. She just left. Said her dad was sick....My dad is sick too.....but I still have mouths to feed and bills to pay.

    My questions are:

    1) What are chances I could get full custody?
    2) Can she still get full CS when we have 50/50 custody and living arrangements?
    3) Is going to court worth it?

  • #2
    did she set a firm date when she would return?

    Comment


    • #3
      Is she back?

      No matter what a SaHM does getting full custody from her is low chance.

      --

      If I were you, I would offer her SS (1500$/mo for 5 years) and you keep the kids and she doesn't have to pay you CS. Buy her out of the house too.

      Don't go to court with that agreement though. Wait a year and then file it in court. The court will give you full custody since she consented to it but they will overturn the 0 child support.

      Comment


      • #4
        If the trip is taken at face value, then perhaps it would be better not to try and use that to secure primary custody since the two of you have already agreed to 50/50.

        Trying to use what (again, taking at face value) seems to be a legitimate trip may start an escalation.

        As far as child support goes, I believe that with shared custody it would generally be offset, meaning you calculate what you would owe her at full, and also what she would owe you at full table and the difference is paid. If she has no income, try to impute her what would be reasonable for her education and experience, or at least full time minimum wage.

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        • #5
          Be VERY careful about "negotiating" CS. My understanding is that if later challenged by the receiving party, the court would very likely over rule a signed agreement since CS is "the right of the child" and it would revert to "table" amount by the book.

          Likely a better plan is to pay CS "by the book" BUT negotiate SS and perhaps equalization.

          If you have 40% or more custody then the lower earning party essentially has to accept "offset" CS (ie. reduced by the amount the lower paying party would have to pay in CS). If they don't work, unless a REALLY good reason, you should be able to impute minimum wage.

          Comment

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