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Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1  
Old 10-25-2018, 12:24 PM
Lolita123 Lolita123 is offline
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Hello Everyone,


I am curious to see if anyone has lived that situation. My spouses daughter who is 15 lives with her mom about 1 hour away from us. Being 15 now, we don't see her as much anymore.. she got a part time job also.


Last year, the last semester at school was a disaster... We found out that she failed 2 classes and missed over 200 classes... and that she was smoking pot... Spoke to the mom who said she had no idea and that for her pot was ok...


Anyways... So my spouse met with the vice-principal.. daughter was registered in a summer class (still don't know if she passed since every time he asks he gets no answer...


Now, we are back at the same spot... only this time my spouse is being notified .. so far she has missed 67 classes out of 158... Some days we get the answers that she's sick... other days that she's 15 and doesn't want to tell her dad everything.. He asked if it was something relating to her mental health.. we got a no etc... all that to say that the mother is totally enabling her since when she does miss class and we get notified, the following day the absence is confirmed by the mom...


He called the school and basically was told that it's parent approved so from what we get they cannot do anything...


We get that the child may not want to share what's going on but the mother should tell the dad so we know... but really we doubt that there is anything wrong.. meaning that we feel she's just not into school and comes up with excuses not to go...


Any idea what we can do... Also, if she drops out his is still required to pay CS? Any input would help since we feel like we cannot do anything.. we don't want to let it go but at the same time we don't want to have her stop talking to us ...


Legally is there anything we can do?
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Old 10-25-2018, 12:42 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Have you thought about calling CAS? Even just to get some info might be helpful.

Under 18 you still pay support regardless of the childs attendance or performance. Added to that, there is an argument that she has a right to her privacy. The battle to change that is too great.

From a legal perspective he still has to pay. From a caring perspective he can try to get some intervention help but even then not much will work if mom isnt on board with doing anything. Kid will simply distance herself more from dad.
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Old 10-25-2018, 01:12 PM
Lolita123 Lolita123 is offline
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yeah we have thought about contacting CAS.. not the first time they would have been called over there from what I heard... But trying to get through her before that.. also trying to work with the school see what they can do... maybe they can request a medical note since she's missed over 42% of her classes and we know the mother is not reliable...


On another note.. what if a child drops out of school... and then at 19 decides to go back... again parent has to pay even if child dropped out when in fact they were supposed to attend (16-17?)


We truly feel like it's nothing medical since she's always out with her friends and such... actually many times her mom doesn't even know if she's at home or not when she misses school.. she assumes...
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Old 10-25-2018, 02:25 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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Still payable. Its only if she moves out of her mothers house.

The only person she is hurting is herself and the best advice is to send the mother emails advising you are concerned so that when kid pulls her head out of her ass at 20 and ex wants support you can try to argue to stop.

Stopping cs for a delinquent kid is proving to be difficult too. There is one poster on this forum trying to get it stopped for a 21 yo who has spent the last five years sitting at home doing nothing. Still trying to complete their first year at college and a judge was hesitant to stop cs without giving kid (and to a point mom) a chance to cut the shit out.
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Old 10-26-2018, 11:22 AM
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Janus Janus is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lolita123 View Post
On another note.. what if a child drops out of school... and then at 19 decides to go back... again parent has to pay even if child dropped out when in fact they were supposed to attend (16-17?)

General rule of thumb: Child support will always be ordered unless there is a compelling reason for it not to be ordered. If there is any doubt, expect child support to be ordered.


A 19-year old in school living with a parent qualifies. It is mostly irrelevant what has happened in previous years.
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Old 10-26-2018, 10:20 PM
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Might be cheaper to offer to pay for tutor than having to pay for support for extra years it will take for kid to complete school? Sometimes kids quit attending classes because they simply don't have confidence and/or have difficulty with coursework... something to consider. Perhaps have a look at past years' academic records and see how they were doing over past 3 years?
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