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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #1  
Old 11-01-2010, 05:12 PM
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Angry For those who believe court favours men...

For those who believe court favours women (not men as it says in the title), it doesn't always.
I, unemployed, have been ordered to pay my ex $2,500 in court costs for starting a motion to change child support amount. Oh yes, the Judge increased child support payments, but I won't see $2,500 of it.
Please tell me how I'll feed 2 children on $0. Medicine isn't free, nor are dental bills, yet I'm expected to raise two children on nothing for over two and a half months.
They kept making offers saying I had agreed to items that I hadn't. Their lies worked with the Judge. The Judge advised me to see duty counsel. What can duty counsel do after the Judge made an endorsement? I cry, not for me, but for my kids.
I thought it was a "Settlement Hearing" and it was a trial!
Justice doesn't always have the children's best interests first and foremost, that's for certain.
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Old 11-01-2010, 05:45 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Epona View Post
For those who believe court favours women (not men as it says in the title), it doesn't always.
I, unemployed, have been ordered to pay my ex $2,500 in court costs for starting a motion to change child support amount. Oh yes, the Judge increased child support payments, but I won't see $2,500 of it.
Please tell me how I'll feed 2 children on $0. Medicine isn't free, nor are dental bills, yet I'm expected to raise two children on nothing for over two and a half months.
They kept making offers saying I had agreed to items that I hadn't. Their lies worked with the Judge. The Judge advised me to see duty counsel. What can duty counsel do after the Judge made an endorsement? I cry, not for me, but for my kids.
I thought it was a "Settlement Hearing" and it was a trial!
Justice doesn't always have the children's best interests first and foremost, that's for certain.
So you can not get a job? If you were awarded CS but costs against you, my thinking is you were offered a settlement of CS and Custody and you turned it down, then at trail, you did not gain anymore that what was on the table, so costs were ordered against you. My guess is that you will get CS, and what I am saying is really only speculation not knowing your whole story. You wouldn't have to agree to the offers, I just think you would have to of have significant gains, which it appears you did not. So the Judge is sort of saying to you, you should of settled????
  #3  
Old 11-01-2010, 06:30 PM
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Default Never should have gone to court...

My ex decided last year (summer 2009) to stop paying his share of S.7 expenses until a certain amount had been exceeded (it's my theory he wanted me to pay his legal fees, one way or another, from a previous court case that he initiated ). What HE should have done is arranged mediation and then filed a motion to change if we couldn't come to an agreement since he is the one who wanted the change.
Instead he ignored me and left it to me to try a get payment (S.7 expenses, asthma medicine and dental bills). Acting on the advice of FLIC, I filed with FRO. Course FRO collects child support based on the agreement filed with court, which is about $350 less than what he was paying. I gave him a "Withdrawal from FRO" form, but the never faxed it to FRO. I wrote to FRO advising them not to accept a form withdrawing when it became evident he wasn't going to send it in and was not responding to me. I gave him a "Consent Motion to Change Child Support" and when I didn't hear from him for over a month, filed a Motion to Change. That's when the proverbial s**t hit the fan.
In his response, I found out he's was then unemployed (why couldn't he have advised me?). He and his lawyer made an offer and I made a counter offer. We tried mediation and I believed we had an agreement, BUT in their second "Offer To Settle", they changed the terms of the "Mediation Agreement" substantially. At that point I considered it nullified. Before he signed the second Offer to Settle he had signed an Employment Contract, which was not mentioned on the 2nd "Offer to Settle".
With all these Offers To Settle, I have to accept it all or none. They refused to communicate with me when I wrote letters explaining what I agreed to and didn't agree to. They refer to a second mediation, which didn't happen. If it did, I wasn't invited which is why I didn't respond.
It was thoroughly 100% a lack of communication. My ex wins. The kids lose. I don't get child support to shelter, feed, clothe them etc. for 2 1/2 months. I don't qualify for social assistance, and yes, I'm unemployed. I'm trying to get employment but it isn't easy.
I wanted to have the child support amount changed for FRO, but because he was unemployed for a bit, his share of S.7 expenses changed which lowered the arrears of S.7 expenses I was seeking. But because they kept making "Offers to Settle" that included things I never agreed to and I had to agree to it all or none at all and they wouldn't negotiate an agreement we all could be comfortable with...and the Judge believed the untrue things they said about me and I didn't really have a chance to have my say...
If you can afford it, it's good to have a lawyer who'll believe your lies and they can bully you all they like and leave the other person with nothing, which is especially difficult to raise two children on. Family Law doesn't give a ..... about the children. They can live off nothing.
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Old 11-01-2010, 06:54 PM
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Am I understanding it correctly that you are out 2.5 mths of CS that should have been $350/mth higher, in other words about $875?

Can you please clarify how much exactly you have not received in CS due to this incident?

Has an income been imputed to you for CS purposes?
  #5  
Old 11-01-2010, 08:07 PM
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Quote:
For those who believe court favours women (not men as it says in the title), it doesn't always.
Does MOST of the time though. Somewhere around 80%. How much of the time do you have your kids?

Quote:
Please tell me how I'll feed 2 children on $0. Medicine isn't free, nor are dental bills, yet I'm expected to raise two children on nothing for over two and a half months.
So you work out a payment plan. If you are unemployed, your income is effectively 0. Blood/Stone, etc. Where do you get that you have NOTHING to raise them on? Go to Income Assistance.

Quote:
They kept making offers saying I had agreed to items that I hadn't. Their lies worked with the Judge. The Judge advised me to see duty counsel. What can duty counsel do after the Judge made an endorsement?
To help you figure out how to fix it? If you are unemployed, contact Legal Aid, you should qualify for assistance.

Quote:
I thought it was a "Settlement Hearing" and it was a trial!
Sorry, but Settlement + Hearing kind of screams "stuff will be decided here".

Quote:
Justice doesn't always have the children's best interests first and foremost, that's for certain.
If you are the Custodial Parent, Welfare CANNOT turn you away. Plus you should be receiving CCTB for them at a minimum. Or you should be eligible for unemployment in under 6-8 weeks. Income Assistance WILL help you during that gap if you need them to, with the understanding you will pay them back once your EI kicks in. EI Is stupid easy to get, as long as you weren't fired for cause or quit.

If you don't have the funding to pay the court costs right away, it becomes just one more bill. It gets paid to your ex's lawyer, not to the ex.
  #6  
Old 11-01-2010, 09:30 PM
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Default my couch potatoe is going to cost me

my executive husband lost his job 10 years ago.our lifestyle was great. At that time I was raising 3 young children and running a household.I figured I better get back into the working world. so I started my own company got a job at the hospital, raised my children and all the duties that came with it. He laid on the couch watching 20 year old reruns of murder she wrote.he did not help with any household chores nor cooking.10 years later I picked up another full time job working 16 hour days since there is no money comming in. he started his own consult company claimimg incomes of 10.000. i finally decided to end my lonely marriage after 21 years in january 2010. He is taking me to litigation with his downtown lawyer.He has turned two of my three children against me.and wants sole possesion of our 800.000 home.
Im sick that I will have to pay child support to him, I continue to provide for my children. I want the judge to know how useless of a partner he has been. I have just reduced one of my jobs to part time. but in the end i will be penalized for trying to survive.
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Old 11-01-2010, 09:32 PM
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My dead beat husband in marriage wants my hard earned money. while he sat watching tv, I managed it all.I hope in my case the judge will not favour him
  #8  
Old 11-01-2010, 09:42 PM
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Holy moly ruby, not just CS but SS as well. You have a bit of a problem on your hands I'm sorry to tell you.
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Old 11-01-2010, 10:11 PM
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What was his reasoning for not working? Is he not capable of working now?
  #10  
Old 11-02-2010, 09:59 AM
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he is an educated 56 year old man, took jobs at other companies blames me for them falling apart. wanted to consult on his own so thats what he does now.he rented an office but gave that up since he figured our basement has a finished office space so he moved home i hated that. i begged him to stay connected with head hunters , but he always wanted his own company so i struggled for 8-10 years with no income from him,
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