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  • Shared Custody and support

    I have been divorced for a few years now and have just won (through mediation) more time with my children. It brings me up to about 13 days a month plus week on/week off in the summer and an additional 2 weeks during the year.

    Now I'm wondering if I should be putting in a motion to change for support. Her income is 4 times mine, but I pay a minimum amount of support currently and have since we separated.

    I wouldn't even consider going after a shared custody support but the kids are not getting new shoes, backpacks, lunch bags... the necessities. I'm also fully set up as if they live here full time. They don't bring anything from their moms to stay with me. WE have everything including extra snow pants and coats.

    So, I've spoken with my lawyer and he really felt that it was not worth my time and money to seek the change. He feels that the courts are hesitant to change support amounts and really question when the dad is seeking support. Really, I'd be happy to just have no support between us at all. I think our incomes prove that we are both self sufficient.

    Any thoughts from anyone who has been through a dad seeking a change in support?

  • #2
    Originally posted by Singledad3312 View Post
    I have been divorced for a few years now and have just won (through mediation) more time with my children. It brings me up to about 13 days a month plus week on/week off in the summer and an additional 2 weeks during the year.

    Now I'm wondering if I should be putting in a motion to change for support. Her income is 4 times mine, but I pay a minimum amount of support currently and have since we separated.

    I wouldn't even consider going after a shared custody support but the kids are not getting new shoes, backpacks, lunch bags... the necessities. I'm also fully set up as if they live here full time. They don't bring anything from their moms to stay with me. WE have everything including extra snow pants and coats.

    So, I've spoken with my lawyer and he really felt that it was not worth my time and money to seek the change. He feels that the courts are hesitant to change support amounts and really question when the dad is seeking support. Really, I'd be happy to just have no support between us at all. I think our incomes prove that we are both self sufficient.

    Any thoughts from anyone who has been through a dad seeking a change in support?
    You are much more free to negotiate support in a shared access situation than in any other situation. Would your ex agree to you paying no support

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    • #3
      No, she has actually asked to freeze my support at it's current. So, there is no way she will give in amicably.

      Comment


      • #4
        Originally posted by Singledad3312 View Post
        No, she has actually asked to freeze my support at it's current. So, there is no way she will give in amicably.
        Then it's probably best to get a year of status quo under your belt of 50/50 first. I would seriously consider the advice given by your lawyer.

        Comment


        • #5
          This is a great question. I understand the courts may be hesitant about changing support from payor to non-payor but here is the point:

          If you have valid reasons to do so, and you can prove it with evidence, then go ahead and do it .... if it's in the best interest of the children. Do you really need your lawyer to do this for you in court? Can you do this on your own with your lawyer's advice in the background?

          You need to walk a fine line between having enough status quo behind you and show you're not waiting too long to make a claim. I was told here on the forum that there was some case law against making changes but I have not been able to find it myself.

          Here again is what the law states in the matter:

          Shared custody

          9. Where a parent or spouse exercises a right of access to, or has physical custody of, a child for not less than 40 per cent of the time over the course of a year, the amount of the order for the support of a child must be determined by taking into account,

          (a) the amounts set out in the applicable tables for each of the parents or spouses;

          (b) the increased costs of shared custody arrangements; and

          (c) the condition, means, needs and other circumstances of each parent or spouse and of any child for whom support is sought. O. Reg. 391/97, s. 9.


          Family Law Act
          ONTARIO REGULATION 391/97
          CHILD SUPPORT GUIDELINES


          This is similar to my situation by the way, I'm wondering how to do it. I believe it is in the best interest of the children as now there are four of us in a two bedroom apartment, the boys 15 and 10 in one, my daughter 13 in the other and myself on the couch. Week about schedule with my ex making $20k more than me approximately.

          Comment


          • #6
            Originally posted by Singledad3312 View Post
            I have been divorced for a few years now and have just won (through mediation) more time with my children. It brings me up to about 13 days a month plus week on/week off in the summer and an additional 2 weeks during the year.

            Now I'm wondering if I should be putting in a motion to change for support. Her income is 4 times mine, but I pay a minimum amount of support currently and have since we separated.
            I would wait a few months so that it does not appear you sought increased custody for financial gain or relief.
            I'm curious as to what your arrangement was previously. Were you under 40%, i.e. fewer than 11 evenings per month? What were your arguments for increased access? How old are your children?

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            • #7
              Then it's probably best to get a year of status quo under your belt of 50/50 first. I would seriously consider the advice given by your lawyer.
              This seems prudent, especially if your request for no support was made in writing.

              Comment


              • #8
                The other party will argue that they made financial plans based on an expected level of support, one which you agreed to.

                They will argue that you have gotten along just fine for over a year with the current situation and so you are not in distress.

                They will argue that despite the time-share with the children, they were orginal CP and you were NCP and that they are still covering expenses as such.

                You will have to provide a detailed budget showing the expenses you incur for the children, the effect this has on your household budget, and a comparison of households showing that your NDI is significantly below the other party, and thus the children's lifestyle during the time they spend with you is severly affected.

                I don't believe there is consistancy in cases like this, I have seen at least one case where a judge denied the shared set-off. It was posted here about a month ago.

                Comment


                • #9
                  Originally posted by Singledad3312 View Post
                  Now I'm wondering if I should be putting in a motion to change for support. Her income is 4 times mine, but I pay a minimum amount of support currently and have since we separated.



                  Are you currently paying the table amount? She agreed it being frozen at the current amount? Can she even legally do that?

                  I would be scared that if you try and change the support she may try and backpedal and take you to court to get all the CS that should have been paid

                  Comment

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