Public Slaying of Palestinian Woman

[tiredofthisnow]

I came across this story just now, I know that we say our ex's are bad but I can't even imagine how these women must feel.

Public slashing of Palestinian woman’s throat over divorce sparks protest - thestar.com

[murphyslaw]

Global Toronto | Oakville woman died of multiple stab wounds

[arabian]

We are so very fortunate to live in Canada. For the record, I am not arabian (that is just the breed of the horse I owned). I am a WASP (white anglo saxon protestant) LOL.

[murphyslaw]

Since crime rates in Canada are falling, is violence against women still a serious problem?

• On average, every six days a woman in Canada is killed by her intimate partner. In 2009, 67 women were murdered by a current or former spouse or boyfriend.1
• On any given day in Canada, more than 3,000 women (along with their 2,500 children) are living in an emergency shelter to escape domestic violence.2
• Each year, over 40,000 arrests result from domestic violence—that’s about 12% of all violent crime in Canada.3 Since only 22% of all incidents are reported to the police, the real number is much higher.
• As of 2010, there were 582 known cases of missing or murdered Aboriginal women in Canada.4 Both Amnesty International and the United Nations have called upon the Canadian government to take action on this issue, without success.5,6
• In just one year in Canada, 427,000 women over the age of 15 reported they had been sexually assaulted.7 Since only about 10% of all sexual assaults are reported to the police, the actual number is much higher.8
• Half of all women in Canada have experienced at least one incident of physical or sexual violence since the age of 16.9
• About 80% of sex trafficking victims in Canada are women and girls.10
• 61% of all Canadians say they personally know at least one woman who has been sexually or physically assaulted.11
• More than one in ten Canadian women say they have been stalked by someone in a way that made them fear for their life.12
• The cost of violence against women in Canada for health care, criminal justice, social services, and lost wages and productivity has been calculated at $4.2 billion per year.13

lhttp://www.canadianwomen.org/facts-about-violence/

We are very lucky but still more to do :-)

[Tayken]

On average, every six days a woman in Canada is killed by her intimate partner. In 2009, 67 women were murdered by a current or former spouse or boyfriend.

Counter to this point is the statistics that can be played that "intimate partner abuse" is equal between the sexes and it only reviews it at a "man-woman" partnership. What about male-male and female-female "intimate partner abuse"?

The argument counter can be made with piles of statistics that the conduct is different but, still classified as "abuse" (psychological).

On any given day in Canada, more than 3,000 women (along with their 2,500 children) are living in an emergency shelter to escape domestic violence.

If there was support for male victims of intimate partner abuse it would be interesting to see how this statistic would change and the relevance.

Each year, over 40,000 arrests result from domestic violence—that’s about 12% of all violent crime in Canada.

You can find counter statistics and "findings" easily to this statistic.

For example:

http://www.familyofmen.com/wp-conten...ctic_Scale.pdf

Since only 22% of all incidents are reported to the police, the real number is much higher.

For "men" the statistic is even worse for reporting "intimate partner abuse".

Both Amnesty International and the United Nations have called upon the Canadian government to take action on this issue, without success.

The reference to "5" is not present on the webiste. The only call is for Aboriginal issues that I see which is demographic specific. Painting the entire male population with this statistic is not probably helping resolve the complex issues of "intimate partner abuse".

It is information like this that polarizes the "domestic violence" industry. Hopefully with the development of same sex relationships a better focus on "intimate partner abuse" will unfold over time and the "statistics" fight will end.

Intimate partner abuse is not about man vs. woman and transcends gender, sexual orientation and race. Until such time we realize this as a society it will just be a gender war of relatively useless statistics on both sides of the "male" and "female" argument which only causes more conflict... Doesn't resolve the problem.

[murphyslaw]

Tayken I am not dismissing violence against men at all but for every three men that kill their partner/spouse there is one female that kills theirs.I believe that violence against men is hugely unreported and I firmly believe that the police service has much to do with this
.In recent years women have declined in reporting abuse and yet in this modern age there still isn't alot of reporting of violence by men.I have come across females boasting openly about smashing up their boyfriend in arguments with sneering glee.In one case the woman was sentenced to anger management classes at her own expense.

When one considers that only recently police started being trained in multiculturalism, is it much wonder that they know so little about domestic violence?Imagine a man trying to tell a "old school" cop that his wife smashed him across the face with an iron?Would this violence be taken seriously or would it be suggested that his wife "may have been trying to straighten him out" or some other droll take on his personal hell.Considering the prevalence of Neanderthal men like resourceful and slug,would they be at risk at losing promotions at work and other social stigmas???Men's attitudes to men have to change too.
The fix is not to throw out abuse of women but rather meld the two together.Abusers of both sexes share all the same attributes mentally ,the entitlement ,the anger.But the best way to move forward is to stop the abuse of the system.There is those who are abusers that run to the system in order to gain the upper hand over their victim.Through better training in the system these people can be spotted and punished.Maybe not more shelters but more all shape and size family oriented.

[Rioe]

The main difference I notice in those two articles is that the one in Canada likely committed suicide, whereas the one in Palestine carried on with life as normal.

So Canadians know what they are doing is wrong, do it anyway, and then hand down their own consequences to themselves.

In Palestine, they still haven't internalized into their culture that killing one's wife is wrong.

I read some interesting studies years ago about the evolutionary rationales for spousal murders, but I'm not going to say more yet because I want to track down the sources before I'm called out on them. Tayken can be so harsh!

[blinkandimgone]

She can be quite the bully....

[Tayken]

Tayken I am not dismissing violence against men at all but for every three men that kill their partner/spouse there is one female that kills theirs.

Counter to that statement is the argument made by the other side that more men commit suicide and teenage boys. Studies have been done on the rates of suicide and often it is the result of psychological abuse. Suicide rates of men after separation and divorce is an ugly statistic to even consider and very sad.

I believe that violence against men is hugely unreported and I firmly believe that the police service has much to do with this.

The police are two narrow of an organization to single out in these situations. The lack of support for men in abusive intimate relationships is the problem. Stereotypical beliefs drive many organizations. Look at how Revenue Canada automatically assumes that the female is the parent when evaluating taxes and CCBT. There are a number of systemic issues which hopefully will be addressed as more same sex marriages go before the court in divorce matters and children are involved.

In recent years women have declined in reporting abuse and yet in this modern age there still isn't alot of reporting of violence by men.

This is more an issue in my opinion that the definition of what constitutes "abuse" has been skewed. Shelters are now reporting that using "logic" is abusive.

An Immodest Proposal: Domestic Violence Groups Claim the Use of Logic by Men is Abuse | Shrink4Men

Also, the abuse argument gets into the often difficult to determine world of the subjective versus the objective.

I have come across females boasting openly about smashing up their boyfriend in arguments with sneering glee.In one case the woman was sentenced to anger management classes at her own expense.

Both sexes are equally capable of abuse.

When one considers that only recently police started being trained in multiculturalism, is it much wonder that they know so little about domestic violence?

It is disappointing that the officers called to incidents often do not have proper training in domestic situations.

Imagine a man trying to tell a "old school" cop that his wife smashed him across the face with an iron? Would this violence be taken seriously or would it be suggested that his wife "may have been trying to straighten him out" or some other droll take on his personal hell.

Remember, this is his personal hell. No one has to remain in an abusive relationship. I think more education has to be provided to both sexes about what constitutes abuse and the laws around separation and divorce at the time of marriage or earlier. No one advises people when they get married of their legal rights to a divorce but, we license their marriage.

Considering the prevalence of Neanderthal men like resourceful and slug, would they be at risk at losing promotions at work and other social stigmas???

Everyone is at risk in separation and divorce. Look at the incidents of mental health issues for both sexes after separation and divorce. Resourceful and Slughead10 express the other side of the fence to the extreme allegations websites like the one you linked in favour of female instigated intimate partner abuse.

It always boils down to a "statistics prove everything" argument when they don't solve the problem but, project blame. We as a society need to accept the problem equally across all genders, sexual orientation and races.

It is not just a "man" vs "woman" debate. It is about the health and well being of our most important asset "families" (children).

Men's attitudes to men have to change too.

The problem is that

The fix is not to throw out abuse of women but rather meld the two together.

A more conclusive stance in the CCC and FLR/CLR/Divorce Act on what constitutes "intimate partner abuse" needs to be put forward in legislation.

Abusers of both sexes share all the same attributes mentally ,the entitlement ,the anger.

Intimate partner abuse knows no race, gender or sexual orientation. Also, as society develops and changes the forms of abuse change as well.

What about a partner who slanders the other all over the internet, on facebook, on twitter... The channels for these abusers to continue their distortion campaigns and create havoc have expanded.

But the best way to move forward is to stop the abuse of the system.

What system though? Law enforcement? The Family Court System? Gender bias "shelter system"? There are so many systemic issues to address in the matter.

There is those who are abusers that run to the system in order to gain the upper hand over their victim. Through better training in the system these people can be spotted and punished. Maybe not more shelters but more all shape and size family oriented.

I think that better integration of a system that is much better at dealing with the issues needs to be integrated better: The Health Care System.

Allegation of abuse... Clinical study should result. Both parties to the conduct need help to stop what is happening and to help both parties. Law is there to make a determination on something not to address mental health issues. In fact, one could argue that the system is actually contributing a lot of the societal anxiety that exists in most separations and divorce that go to court.

Good Luck!
Tayken

[Tayken]

In Palestine, they still haven't internalized into their culture that killing one's wife is wrong.

Progress in a society will not happen (economic, social, etc.) until all genders, sexual orientations and races have equal standing under the law.

[Tayken]

She can be quite the bully....

“Not fair! She's smarter than me! She makes meeeeeeee feeeeeeeeeeel stupid and irrational when she gets all logical! You think you’re so smart, don’t you?! Quit trying to impose the facts on me! Abuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse!”

Quote from:

An Immodest Proposal: Domestic Violence Groups Claim the Use of Logic by Men is Abuse | Shrink4Men

(Inside joke Murphyslaw... Not directed at you in any way.)

[murphyslaw]

“Not fair! She's smarter than me! She makes meeeeeeee feeeeeeeeeeel stupid and irrational when she gets all logical! You think you’re so smart, don’t you?! Quit trying to impose the facts on me! Abuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuse!”

Quote from:

An Immodest Proposal: Domestic Violence Groups Claim the Use of Logic by Men is Abuse | Shrink4Men

(Inside joke Murphyslaw... Not directed at you in any way.)

Wont take it personally Taken,I was the logical non-emotional mess in the marriage.Strangely enough much of those ridiculous arguments were thrown at me.Sex withheld as punishment etc-Ive been there.
Maybe there should be relationship courses in high school so we can get a handle on our situation sooner. Before we invest financially and emotionally, into relationships with unsuitable people.While knowing how to change a car tire is great-its not rocket science.On the other hand...being able to spot a future pain in the ass would be priceless!

[Tayken]

Wont take it personally Taken,I was the logical non-emotional mess in the marriage.Strangely enough much of those ridiculous arguments were thrown at me.

And what both sides of the "domestic violence argument" don't realize is the relevance in a matter where someone (or both parties) has filed with the court to separate and divorce.

So you have to take the perspective of the judge possibly...

"Ok, I have two people sitting here debating who withheld sex from whom. Clearly they are not getting back together so why are they even arguing this?"

Sex withheld as punishment etc-Ive been there.

That is one that both women and men make in their affidavits all the time. What relevance (see pondering question above) does it have on the matters at hand. They are getting separated and divorced. Not much sex happening now.

Maybe there should be relationship courses in high school so we can get a handle on our situation sooner. Before we invest financially and emotionally, into relationships with unsuitable people.

I am more of the opinion before a legal agreement is made (marriage) as it should be a fully informed decision. But, I don't have any really good counter arguments to it being before that and it may be beneficial as abusive relationships know no age.

Good Luck!
Tayken

[Pursuinghappiness]

Not to throw off the thread but personally I wish there was more work being done on violence towards children.

I read another article this morning about a couple that literally starved and tortured their small child to death...and there are just way too many awful stories in the news like this lately.

[Tayken]

Not to throw off the thread but personally I wish there was more work being done on violence towards children.

I read another article this morning about a couple that literally starved and tortured their small child to death...and there are just way too many awful stories in the news like this lately.

Actually, it really isn't "off topic" because a major component of "intimate partner abuse" is the impact it has on children which should be the primary concern for everyone involved.

With regards to child deaths... People wonder why CAS won't come to their house and scold the other parent about taking their children to see a movie they disagreed with or didn't like...

One would wonder why they weren't involved when this happens (CAS) and what other totally useless matter they were attending to that wasted their time, public tax payers money and put other in-need children at risk.

Good Luck!
Tayken