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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 02-11-2014, 01:11 AM
stripes stripes is offline
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(I just noticed that a bunch of people picked up on this discrepancy on your other thread, so I'm being redundant here).

I should also add that I'm not completely unsympathetic. I'm in a long-term committed relationship in which distance is a major factor. We both have week on/week off residence with our kids, but our schedules are completely opposite, such that whenever he has his kids, I don't have mine, and vice versa. In other words, there is almost no time for the two of us when no one has kids, when we could be together. This kind of sucks (and it means the kids don't get to see each other either, which they don't like). But neither of us would try to pressure our exes into changing their schedule to accommodate our relationship. Stability for the kids (including stepkids, on one side) means maintaining the status quo, even if it is not ideal for our relationship. We're the grown-ups, we make the sacrifices. If what you have with your girlfriend is strong, you'll find a way to make the relationship work, despite the distance.
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  #12  
Old 02-11-2014, 11:56 AM
Pidge123 Pidge123 is offline
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Fair enough . . but the reality is that my job is (seriously) at stake . . I AM going to have to travel significantly (to Europe and other places). But please don't ram these two together, because the question about a girl in Europe is more explorational than anything else. If I am able to travel more, I "should" be fine there . . and if I travel more and then meet a girl abroad (which I've done before), that's a bonus in my eyes. However, the main priority and justification for the whole 7-7 IS my job.
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  #13  
Old 02-11-2014, 12:01 PM
Pidge123 Pidge123 is offline
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Yes, I am. However, let's not lump these into one. The moving question was more explorational than anything else. The reality is that my job IS at stake and if I can't make that transition to 7-7 (which would involve travel to Europe AND elsewhere), my job will be seriously at jeapordy. The possibility of me meeting someone elsewhere is a bonus more than anything else (in my mind). But regardless, the priority and focus would be maintaining my job.
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  #14  
Old 02-11-2014, 12:15 PM
stripes stripes is offline
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If/when you communicate these goals to others, you should be sure to keep your story straight. The posts you've made here have some inconsistencies which could lead others to doubt the veracity of your story. First the travel is to spend half your time in Europe, then it's to visit places in Europe and elsewhere. First it's about saving your job, then it's about a woman you met, then you haven't actually met a woman but you might if you travelled more because it's happened before.

If I were you, before I even broached this with my ex, I would get a notarized letter from the HR department at my employer stating exactly how your job is changing, when these changes are coming into effect, and what the company requires (as in "this is a key requirement of the position") from you in terms of travel (and why these requirements can't be met by existing technologies like Skype meetings). Your own word isn't good enough. Given the stories you've offered here, I suspect your ex will assume that you're spinning things to get a schedule which offers you more convenience and a chance to visit Europe for personal reasons.
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  #15  
Old 02-11-2014, 12:26 PM
Links17 Links17 is offline
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I agree with stripes - even with the letter and stuff it still won't be easy.
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