Ottawa Divorce .com Forums

38deruiter · #1 01-24-2017, 11:19 PM

It has been 3 years since I filed for divorce. Everything is complete from my side of the table. I cannot get a response from the other side. It has been 7 months since our last court date and we left there almost complete! I feel like my ex is delaying on purpose to pptevent my life from moving no forward. Is there any way that I can speed up the process? It's seems like my ex has all the control by not responding to my letters from my lawyer. Feeling frustrated!!

e28makaveli · #2 02-02-2017, 12:17 PM

In a similar boat here. Unfortunately, I have no advice to offer.

In my case, I keep paying support based on mutual agreement. Almost feels right to stop paying for support until we get a court order. But, this may not look good in the eyes of the judge. A frustrating experience indeed.

LovingFather32 · #3 02-02-2017, 01:47 PM

Advice # 1: Make it part of your life. Be one with the divorce process. SMile in the face of stress. Have lot's of good sex.

Advice # 2: I would hammer down the PRIMARY OBJECTIVES next time I'm in court.

https://www.ontario.ca/laws/regulation/990114

Quote:

PRIMARY OBJECTIVE
(2) The primary objective of these rules is to enable the court to deal with cases justly. O. Reg. 114/99, r. 2 (2).

DEALING WITH CASES JUSTLY
(3) Dealing with a case justly includes,

(a) ensuring that the procedure is fair to all parties;

(b) saving expense and time;

(c) dealing with the case in ways that are appropriate to its importance and complexity; and

(d) giving appropriate court resources to the case while taking account of the need to give resources to other cases. O. Reg. 114/99, r. 2 (3).

DUTY TO PROMOTE PRIMARY OBJECTIVE
(4) The court is required to apply these rules to promote the primary objective, and parties and their lawyers are required to help the court to promote the primary objective. O. Reg. 114/99, r. 2 (4).

DUTY TO MANAGE CASES
(5) The court shall promote the primary objective by active management of cases, which includes,

(a) at an early stage, identifying the issues, and separating and disposing of those that do not need full investigation and trial;

(b) encouraging and facilitating use of alternatives to the court process;

(c) helping the parties to settle all or part of the case;

(d) setting timetables or otherwise controlling the progress of the case;

(e) considering whether the likely benefits of taking a step justify the cost;

(f) dealing with as many aspects of the case as possible on the same occasion; and

(g) if appropriate, dealing with the case without parties and their lawyers needing to come to court, on the basis of written documents or by holding a telephone or video conference. O. Reg. 114/99, r. 2 (5).

Judges love when you remind them of the primary objectives. Then they remind the OP in a harsher manner.

Pursuinghappiness · #4 02-02-2017, 04:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by 38deruiter

It has been 3 years since I filed for divorce. Everything is complete from my side of the table. I cannot get a response from the other side. It has been 7 months since our last court date and we left there almost complete! I feel like my ex is delaying on purpose to pptevent my life from moving no forward. Is there any way that I can speed up the process? It's seems like my ex has all the control by not responding to my letters from my lawyer. Feeling frustrated!!

That is what the other side is doing and unfortunately, there's little you can do about it.

Happened to me too...my divorce took almost 6 years and cost wayyyy more than it should have.

Just find something else to distract yourself with. Start your life...move forward and trust that it will eventually be over.

trinton · #5 02-02-2017, 04:32 PM

be patient and everything will slowly start to fall to-together, as long as you keep yourself together and you don't fall apart.

Trust me , I've been patiently waiting and waiting, day after day, week after week, month after month, adjournment after adjournment, year by year, and still waiting.

Never give up.

piggybanktoex · #6 02-06-2017, 06:00 PM

Marriage was the biggest mistake of my life....except for the kids.

NEVER AGAIN, EVER!

Pursuinghappiness · #7 02-06-2017, 06:19 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by piggybanktoex

Marriage was the biggest mistake of my life....except for the kids.

NEVER AGAIN, EVER!

The best revenge an ex can get on a person is to change who you are. There are so many people who come out of divorce bitter, angry and thinking every member of the same gender as their ex is the same.

I would never be foolish enough to let my ex do that to me. I have always known that I simply picked my ex badly without enough forethought or insight into who I was and who he was. But there was no way, I would EVER give up my dreams based on my silly, useless ex.

I re-married the perfect guy. And as a result, I'm happier, wealthier, fitter, etc, etc, etc than I've ever been in my life.

Some people just never get enough of being victimized by a bad marriage.

rockscan · #8 02-06-2017, 06:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Pursuinghappiness

The best revenge an ex can get on a person is to change who you are. There are so many people who come out of divorce bitter, angry and thinking every member of the same gender as their ex is the same.

I would never be foolish enough to let my ex do that to me. I have always known that I simply picked my ex badly without enough forethought or insight into who I was and who he was. But there was no way, I would EVER give up my dreams based on my silly, useless ex.

I re-married the perfect guy. And as a result, I'm happier, wealthier, fitter, etc, etc, etc than I've ever been in my life.

Some people just never get enough of being victimized by a bad marriage.

My partners life is infinitely better now that he is out of his ex's clutches. More money, more fun, more happiness, more self esteem, more adventures. Don't let a bad relationship colour the rest of your life!

piggybanktoex · #9 02-06-2017, 07:06 PM

That's only because I am still writing support payments of 6 figures until 2030, that started in 2007.

Can't imagine why I am still sometimes a bit bitter. Must be me. : P

A 2007 divorce for me ends in 2030.....guess that's fair in some eyes, in my ex's for one.

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