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  Ottawa Divorce .com Forums > Main Category > Financial Issues

Financial Issues This forum is for discussing any of the financial issues involved in your divorce.

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  #11  
Old 04-20-2022, 11:18 AM
concernedmother concernedmother is offline
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
Then do what the judge said and file your motion for child support with that as proof and ask for a set amount for s7 including day care and medical expenses.
Yes, that's what I will be doing. Thanks. I wish he understands this money is not for me but for the child. But he will fight with me till the end to reduce it. Sadly, he will keep doing that until the child turns 18, which means, I will have to keep going back to court (

In his CRA notice of assessment, he shows he makes 20,000 a year. That's so not true.
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  #12  
Old 04-20-2022, 12:05 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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One of the biggest things people say on this thread is you cant force someone to parent. And in your case this is true.

You can offer him the time but if he doesnt want to use it, thats on him not you. Which is why I said make sure it is clear in your order/minutes of settlement that you note he has to give you 48 hrs notice about his parenting time. If he doesnt tell you he wants to see the child, you arent sitting around waiting.

As far as what you know related to supervised time, it is still a high bar to reach. Plus access centres are backed up for time/supervision. Being a terrible person or flighty or non responsive or having a short attention span does not mean he needs supervision. A judge will delve into this and you need to demonstrate a serious and imminent danger. Theres no need to argue with me or anyone else on the forum, we are pointing out how the courts see it.
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  #13  
Old 04-20-2022, 01:00 PM
concernedmother concernedmother is offline
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Originally Posted by rockscan View Post
One of the biggest things people say on this thread is � you can�t force someone to parent. And in your case this is true.

You can offer him the time but if he doesnt want to use it, thats on him not you. Which is why I said make sure it is clear in your order/minutes of settlement that you note he has to give you 48 hrs notice about his parenting time. If he doesnt tell you he wants to see the child, you arent sitting around waiting.

As far as what you know related to supervised time, it is still a high bar to reach. Plus access centres are backed up for time/supervision. Being a terrible person or flighty or non responsive or having a short attention span does not mean he needs supervision. A judge will delve into this and you need to demonstrate a serious and imminent danger. There�s no need to argue with me or anyone else on the forum, we are pointing out how the courts see it.
You are correct on everything you wrote.

Settlement offer was rejected, even though it was reasonable.
There is no agreement on whether he will reply or not. Not just yet. Only email and text messages with him and nothing else. This is what he offered. But we don't have proven successful email or text communication, as he never replied.

With him, I will have to sit and wait whether he will show up or not. And do that all the time.
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  #14  
Old 04-20-2022, 01:16 PM
rockscan rockscan is offline
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And thats why you get the clause saying if he does not advise you within 48 hours you can make your own plans!
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  #15  
Old 04-20-2022, 01:20 PM
Brampton33 Brampton33 is offline
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Lots of "what ifs" in the correspondence. What if he doesn't show up? What if this? What if that? All speculation. What if he is an amazing parent who steps up?

Work out a separation agreement with specific parenting times in place. Its not about you "giving him time". The child is both of yours. He will have his scheduled parenting time to spend with his child. Include a clause that states he must give 48 hours notice if he does not plan on seeing his kid during his scheduled parenting time. Should he breach that clause numerous times, document it. Then when you have enough evidence, bring it back to court to have separation agreement altered to suit the situation.
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  #16  
Old 04-20-2022, 01:39 PM
concernedmother concernedmother is offline
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Originally Posted by Brampton33 View Post
Lots of "what ifs" in the correspondence. What if he doesn't show up? What if this? What if that? All speculation. What if he is an amazing parent who steps up?

Work out a separation agreement with specific parenting times in place. Its not about you "giving him time". The child is both of yours. He will have his scheduled parenting time to spend with his child. Include a clause that states he must give 48 hours notice if he does not plan on seeing his kid during his scheduled parenting time. Should he breach that clause numerous times, document it. Then when you have enough evidence, bring it back to court to have separation agreement altered to suit the situation.
Correct. Thanks for your response.
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  #17  
Old 04-20-2022, 06:09 PM
iona6656 iona6656 is offline
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Originally Posted by Brampton33 View Post
Litigants place far too much emphasis on supervised access. Claiming that it is an outright necessity because the other parent is so unfit. Remember this, supervised access is always meant to be a temporary solution, meaning that it is ordered for a short period of time (ie: 3-6 months).

This can occur for reunification purposes where there was a significant absence between child/parent. So that they get used to being around eachother again.

It can also be ordered where other parent has a serious addiction, where they need to demonstrate that they are clean/sober when parenting their child(ren). The supervised access centre takes notes on the interaction between parent/child and whether parent was attentive to child, early/late, etc.

Again, people scream for supervised access when they should know it is always meant by the courts to be used as a temporary measure.
This is a broad strokes interpretation. Overly so.

Were you subject to a supervised visitation order?

There are a lot of reasons supervision is in place. Yes- they are *usually* meant to be temporary. But not always.

There are many factors to consider regarding supervision. E.g whether it is at a centre, whether supervisors can be family members , etc etc...
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