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Consequences of Withholding Access

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  • #16
    Originally posted by FirstTimer View Post
    How many motions did you go through before it was switched.

    When you say signficant break, how long was that? She withheld access from you? My situation is slightly different, she breaks the court order by not taking him to school on his days.

    She's been doing this for the past 6 months and i was going to take her to court on this but we have a hearing scheduled by the judge Sept 8.

    Howver, I just found out yesterday that she as the application didn't book it, so now it could be possible that we will not be in court till next year due to the fact that there are no available spots for special chambers till beginning of next year.
    Dates for special chambers (Alberta) come available frequently. You have to check daily. Here is the link for Edmonton. You can navigate around and insert your city.

    https://albertacourts.ca/docs/defaul...pdf?sfvrsn=602

    "To book a 20-60 minute "family law special chambers" application to be heard in Edmonton, please call (780)638-3637 (a dedicated phone line to the Edmonton clerks' office). This is offered in Edmonton only, at the moment. All FLS applications are set for 2:00 pm. The weblink below, showing "FLS Available hearing dates" only pertains to booking a 20-60 minute application, and DOES NOT apply to applications outside the hearing length guidelines set out in Family Law Practice Note #2, eff. March 1, 2011. PLEASE NOTE: If your application will exceed 60 minutes, you can only book it through the Special Chambers Trial Coordinator at (780)422-2313."

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    • #17
      Originally posted by Dadx5 View Post
      I had a very high conflict ex, who broke court orders all the time, each time there was a significant break I went for a motion, eventually the contempts added up and she lost time, we moved from her having sole to shared.

      Again she played games and withheld more, so judge moved child into my primary care granting me some extra days.

      Ex continued and withheld again, and for now she has no access with our daughter.

      Its a long battle but it can be won. Just document, attempt access everytime, and go for motions change will happen it just might be slow.
      This sounds strikingly similar to my situation. I have just reached 2 months of not seeing my kids again. Motion will hopefully be heard in the coming weeks.

      Surprised to come across this news article yesterday. A bit disturbing how long it took for the courts to finally grant the father custody, but still a step in the right direction:

      Mom loses custody for alienating dad | Toronto Star

      https://www.canlii.org/en/on/onsc/do...&resultIndex=1
      Last edited by ninehundredt; 08-27-2015, 09:23 AM. Reason: Added CanLII link.

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      • #18
        2 months Ninehundret? Wow. My longest was 3 months. Hardest time of my life. I feel your pain my friend.

        Some nights if there was thunderstorm I would look at the lightning and wonder if D4 was scared. Knowing I couldnt comfort her was debilitating. Lot's of sleepless nights. IMO it's one of the most traumatic things one person can do to another.

        Parent's who haven't gone through it have no idea just how much it hurts. And if it hurts us that much as parents .. imagine the children, whose loving parent just disappeared without a trace.

        Just as much case law cites .. denying access is tantamount to abuse.

        DadX has great advice.

        Good luck and please keep us updated.

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        • #19
          I appreciate the sentiment. My longest was also three months during the initial separation. I had hoped that I would never experience that again, but here we are.

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          • #20
            It is sad to see this happen. It's starting to sound like a regular occurrence. But believe me it comes around to bite them in the butt. Like they say record every time access is not given and be patient. I too went through this a year and a half later I see the kids week on week and off. Best feeling in the world that can't be replaced........

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            • #21
              Originally posted by LovingFather32 View Post
              2 months Ninehundret? Wow. My longest was 3 months. Hardest time of my life. I feel your pain my friend.
              Couldnt agree more, mine was also about 2 months at initial separation, the first move from ex's lawyer was filing of an emergency motion for CS which i had no problem paying, my lawyer went back suggesting we will use that motion for child access instead and based on facts will likely win ... bingo access granted ... from then ex did withhold access few times but i never brought contempt motion.

              now that I have custody she skips a lot of her accesses, i wonder if missing access could also be considered contempt of court?

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              • #22
                Originally posted by sahibjee View Post
                i wonder if missing access could also be considered contempt of court?
                No but barring exceptional circumstances she will never get shared custody.

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                • #23
                  Just a brief update. My emergency motion to restore access and get things rolling with an exchange centre was heard and granted immediately approximately two weeks ago. We contacted the exchange centre and gathered the necessary information to begin the process.

                  Aside from receiving the very clear court order, my ex was also notified by my lawyer over a week ago with instructions to contact the exchange centre to schedule her intake appointment.

                  So far we have not received any notification from her or the exchange centre that an appointment has been made. It looks like we may have to take her back to court once again and proceed with contempt charges. It's really becoming quite ridiculous.

                  I've now not seen my kids for three months. I'm honestly not thrilled with how the court is handling this. It seems like each time they give her a slap on the wrist and send her on her way...and I walk away with more debt. I sincerely hope this adds up to an eventual custody decision in my favor.

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                  • #24
                    Originally posted by ninehundredt View Post
                    Just a brief update. My emergency motion to restore access and get things rolling with an exchange centre was heard and granted immediately approximately two weeks ago. We contacted the exchange centre and gathered the necessary information to begin the process.

                    Aside from receiving the very clear court order, my ex was also notified by my lawyer over a week ago with instructions to contact the exchange centre to schedule her intake appointment.

                    So far we have not received any notification from her or the exchange centre that an appointment has been made. It looks like we may have to take her back to court once again and proceed with contempt charges. It's really becoming quite ridiculous.

                    I've now not seen my kids for three months. I'm honestly not thrilled with how the court is handling this. It seems like each time they give her a slap on the wrist and send her on her way...and I walk away with more debt. I sincerely hope this adds up to an eventual custody decision in my favor.
                    Keep your head my friend.

                    I recently read this case law ... it reminds me how smart judges are.
                    https://www.canlii.org/en/on/oncj/do...resultIndex=65

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                    • #25
                      Thanks LF32. I'll give it a read

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                      • #26
                        Just passed the 4 month mark. Ex was served a few weeks ago, as she failed to setup exchanges as ordered. Received her responding materials today. She's asking that the contempt be dismissed, as she's "acting in the best interests of the children" so she says. Also requesting that the original custody agreement be changed to stipulate that my access should only occur at a supervised access centre...and to top it off she's asking for costs.

                        One thing she did seem ok with is the involvement of the OCL, which I requested. Interested to see what will happen at court in a few weeks.

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                        • #27
                          Not very smart of her IMO.

                          What she's saying is that she knows better than the judge.

                          Perhaps I missed it ... why was it again that she feels you "require" supervision?

                          Can you hear the shovel?....Digging herself a hole. I hear that sound all the time with my ex.

                          You havent seen your kids in months. That's BS!!!!! Most traumatic thing you can do to a parent ... or child. Paent's who do this without proving why should be incarcerated.

                          I know that you feel completely drained .. all you think about every minute is your kids. Stay strong .. the sun shall rise again. Trust me.
                          Last edited by LovingFather32; 11-13-2015, 11:03 AM.

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                          • #28
                            To keep this thread from going completely off topic I've moved my specific case content into this thread (for anyone who is interested):

                            http://www.ottawadivorce.com/forum/f...-record-17460/

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