User CP
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| Domestic Violence Dealing with abuse and violence. Getting support and help. |
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#11
11-30-2011, 10:01 AM
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CAS tends to take very seriously concerns or incidents reported by doctors, police and sometimes teachers. I've never seen them do very much when regular citizens report things.
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#12
11-30-2011, 01:31 PM
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thanks NBDad for your support. He has "retaliated" and is working on filing a motion to change. All because his WCB went from 100% to 75% and so I owe him "more CS"!
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#13
11-30-2011, 02:28 PM
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By responding in red you are demonstrating frustration and anger. I do not see the relevance on a child being an only child in this matter. Quote:
The constant involvement of CAS to resolve matters can reflect incredibly negatively on the parent who continually raises allegations where no finding is found to their complaints. Be very careful on how you try to "leverage" the CAS in these matters. It can backfire on you and you may find them identifying you as a high-conflict individual. Quote:
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2. Children are not adults and CAS is very good at investigating matters of abuse. There are proceedures for investigating this and they will follow them. 3. CAS is independent of your feelings. Quote:
2. I have read your correspondence and have to say without reading the orders of the court and the findings regarding your statements, I cannot pass judgment on anything you provide to a public forum. Quote:
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You are anticipating that he is going to become a child abuser. Judges, CAS and the law does not operate on emotional beliefs/facts. They operate on cogent evidence. Quote:
Yet you have agreed to 50-50. It doesn't really fit well with what you are claiming. If there was a finding of abuse by a professional then, why would you agree to 50-50? Quote:
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You are clearly upset. It is unfortunate you have to write in red and in caps which often represents anger. The objective is not to annoy you or upset you. Just provide a perspective. If your friend was abused, I suggest filiing criminal charges and seeking a protective order. Quote:
I actually track through an expert system the allegations being posted by the top posters and cross reference their postings to an emotional pattern system for social media developed by a university in Israel. So, in the click of a button I can cross reference entire threads against standard patterns of emotions for any poster on the site. Good Luck! Tayken
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#14
11-30-2011, 02:30 PM
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By responding in red, she is trying to separate the colours between your portions of the post, and her responses to you...
Eye Dee Ten Tee
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#15
12-01-2011, 03:19 PM
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It can create a nightmare in the message board. I am not a fan of "red" quotes. Blue is more appropriate to separate out who wrote what. Or purple. The colour red carries a lot of feeling and generally not good ones. Good Luck! Tayken
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#16
12-01-2011, 03:21 PM
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Good Luck! Tayken
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#17
12-01-2011, 09:40 PM
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ID10T. All the same.
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#18
12-01-2011, 09:40 PM
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Billiechic, I think you did the responsible thing.
Tayken: Maybe she agreed to 50/50 because she felt that the child had a right to have a relationship with the other parent. Just because a spouse is abusive towards their partner does not 'automatically' mean that they are going to make a bad parent and therefore should have their access reduced. She made a conscious decision to encourage his relationship with the child by agreeing to 50/50 and didn't think her own relationship with him should discolour that in any way. I think that is a very difficult to do, but the best of us manage to do it under the most difficult of circumstances. No one knows if the slap on the face or elsewhere on the child is going to lead to something a lot worse. But why take the chance? Why not get the parent the help he needs now in respect to anger management and parenting before the situation deteriorates. Hopefully CAS will recommend this. Tayken, I don't care what model you are using to assess people's mental health, but unless Billiechic is a patient of yours, you have absolutely no right to draw any conclusions on her psychological state of mind based on what is posted on this forum. Why would you assume the worse? Why not simply accept what she is saying at face value and respond supportively? I agree, calling the CAS to investigate on "false" charges will eventually bite you in the butt. But there is a difference between filing a genuine complaint and making false allegations left, right and centre. I think you got caught like a deer in the headlights mate, and then got all (very,um very) defensive about the use of font, capital letters and color... Nadia Last edited by Nadia; 12-01-2011 at 10:07 PM.
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#19
12-01-2011, 09:57 PM
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#20
12-01-2011, 10:19 PM
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I guess I am drawing a distinction between 1) state of mind as determined by how someone treats another person based on an "specific" incident that took place 2) state of mind as indicated by the content of what is posted, not to mention the use of font, color and capitalization on a public forum?
I think it is fair to assume that we all know our former partners a lot better then we know people on this forum. Last edited by Nadia; 12-01-2011 at 10:58 PM.
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