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  • Date of separation importance.

    My ex and I separated over 3 years ago. We own a matrimonial home and a few rentals. I moved into a rental of ours and he stayed in the matrimonial home. Fast forward 2018 and we decide to reconcile but doesn’t work. Kids and custody isn’t an issue. Ex has an issue with money. During our time apart he used joint loans that were like homeline plans against matrimonial home and a rental. We are talking almost 100k clearly deposited into his personal account and I had no idea what he did with this money. The matrimonial home has increased in value during the last 3 years as well. Pensions are the same. Ex has now inherited property that I want no part of. However, he wants the separation date to remain at the original date 3 years ago. Forgetting about the last 9 months of us living together as a couple. I’m thinking there has to be benefit to him since he is pressuring me to agree. I know I need a lawyer advice but summer vacation for lawyers has made my appointment into mid August. Any insight?

  • #2
    interesting

    he wants you to "look the other way" with regards to the l00k.

    Never agree to anything, ever, without full financial disclosure. I'd insist on that and then have a conversation (bank statements, investment statements, etc.). If he is self-employed then you want all the business legers and bank account statements (for a start).

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    • #3
      three years ago did you do equalization etc?

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      • #4
        No equalization .

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        • #5
          tough one. I would think that you would use the date from three years ago but then you guys still had joint lines of credit that he used and squirreled away 100k so that blurs it.

          I would say use the separation date of now due to the fact you guys never separated finances 3 years ago. The inherited property is totally his. Is the property the reason he wants to use three years ago. Does he think you can get a share of it?

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          • #6
            My (limited) understanding is that the separation date is 3 years ago. The 100K he borrowed(?) is now his asset/debt to pay back if necessary. It's too bad you couldn't have separated your finances back at separation but that is water under the bridge now.

            When you meet with the lawyer in August they should be able to answer this up front.

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            • #7
              Tell him you can't decide which separation date option to go with until you have financial disclosure for both dates.


              Because that's true. You can't make a good decision without all the information you need to consider for your options.

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