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Out of town access accomodations - cost dilemma

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  • Out of town access accomodations - cost dilemma

    Hi all,

    my stbx took the kids from Ottawa and moved to Toronto. I have been driving every second weekend to pick the kids up Sat morning, have them stay with me at my mother's home in St. Catharines, then drive them back to Toronto Sunday evening, then I am back to Ottawa for work Monday morning. I have been doing this since Oct last year, without fail.

    I have not sought relief on this arrangement as the OCL is currently involved and I am awaiting their involvement's conclusion.

    All this said, my mom is old, and needs to sell her home to pay for a care facility. So I now have no place to take the kids during access.

    The way I see it, my options are as follows:

    1. Stay in a hotel with the kids for the access. There are 4 children and myself. so that's 2 hotel rooms.

    2. Stay in a B&B with two rooms.

    3. Rent an apartment, only using it on weekends.

    4. Shoot myself in the head, joke


    The closest friends I have that we could stay with are London,ON. Plus I don't want to impose on them.

    So my questions are:

    1. Has anyone else been in this crappy situation ?

    2. In light of the sale of my mom's home, is it time to file a motion for relief regarding these access arragements ?

    3. If so to question two, what should I ask for, costs ? longer visits ? both ?

    4. Is there a community/church/private service for schleps like me, i.e. an overnight access center in the Toronto area where me and my children can stay safely and affordably ?

    As always thanks to all
    Last edited by plainNamedDad44; 04-25-2014, 01:57 PM. Reason: grammar

  • #2
    My partners kids live in the toronto area and we're in sw ontario. He pays their travel costs (bus or train) to come down and then goes up alternate months. When he does that he stays with friends or my family and only sees the kids during the day. Not sure how old the kids are. Im sure someone on here will know more about relief since your stbx moved. My partner did the moving so he pays the travel costs. (Not that that stops his ex from bitching about her cost to the stations and parking)

    Comment


    • #3
      Originally posted by plainNamedDad44 View Post
      Hi all,



      So my questions are:

      1. Has anyone else been in this crappy situation ?

      2. In light of the sale of my mom's home, is it time to file a motion for relief regarding these access arragements ?

      3. If so to question two, what should I ask for, costs ? longer visits ? both ?

      4. Is there a community/church/private service for schleps like me, i.e. an overnight access center in the Toronto area where me and my children can stay safely and affordably ?

      As always thanks to all
      1. I don't know, but it sounds crappy. My sympathies.
      2. That sounds reasonable to me.
      3. I would think costs is more appropriate, as it gives you some relief but doesn't change the kids' schedule. You might be able to work out some sort of reduction in rates from a local hotel if you booked every weekend. (A B&B might be cheaper). If you're near a university, classes are now over and often universities rent out rooms/apartments in the student residences in the summer at really good rates - more space and maybe more fun for the kids than a hotel, as universities often also have gyms, pools, etc. Look for the Office of Student Residence at your local uni. There are also private (non-university-run) furnished suites you can rent, like mini-apartments - check around university areas (google "campus suites"), as these are used often for visiting lecturers who need a little more space than a hotel room.
      4. I don't know.

      Comment


      • #4
        Stripes,

        many many thanks.

        Love this forum.

        Comment


        • #5
          Following what Stripes suggested, I found this

          http://www.housing.utoronto.ca/summe...nce-Guide.aspx

          Comment


          • #6
            Also, you could have your kids sent from Toronto to Ottawa via train. They have a fantastic escorted minors program that we used to do. Parent A signs them on at Point X and Parent B signs them off at Point Y. The child has to be over 8 years old.

            Travel requirements for unaccompanied children | VIA Rail

            My step daughter did this till she was 11, then traveled on her own till 13, then she started to get tired of travelling so far EOW, that's when the weekends started to become fewer and fewer with the non custodial parent.

            Comment


            • #7
              Originally posted by crosbyfan View Post
              ...then she started to get tired of travelling so far EOW, that's when the weekends started to become fewer and fewer with the non custodial parent.
              This is my fear.

              Also as the weekends are so short its a lot of time in transit for them. I prefer to take the hit.

              Regardless, thanks for response.

              Lastly, if OCL/court finds that they are to stay in TO, I guess I am moving to TO, which is too bad, as I have met a fantastic woman. Her and I have discussed this and looks like no matter where I land, I am friggin commuting !!!

              Comment


              • #8
                If you have not settled your agreement yet you be able to have CS reduce to allow for the extended travel cost. That is what my daughters ex did to her. It was okay, as it did give him the funds to travel the distance. Not that he does, but at least he cannot say he does not have the funds.

                Comment

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