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Divorce & Family Law This forum is for discussing any of the legal issues involved in your divorce.

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Old 11-07-2006, 09:44 AM
jlalex jlalex is offline
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Default asking for consent...

My comman law husband filed divorce papers on his ex wife which asked for divorce, and incluced the amount of child support and visitation schedule ( which they have been practising for years now) as well as a paragraph stating that neither party would ask for spousal support. The 30 day waiting period was up this past friday. On that very day a lawyer contacted our lawyer stating that she was in the process of being retained by the ex-wife.

That lawyer is now asking consent to file her clients materials late. What happens if we don't grant consent?

At this point the only thing I can think of that they would want to dispute is either the spousal support, ask for full custody ( we proposed joint custody with primary residence with her and outlines how major holidays would alternate and the remainder of visitation to be decided by both parties at the beginning of each new year to the best of their abilities taking to account possible scheduling difficulties etc), and splitting his cpp credits for the time they were married - which was an oversite on our part, she is more than welcome to them.

It seems to me that we have proposed a very reasonable agreement, and am having a very difficult time understanding what there is to disagree with. They have been seperated over 8 yrs now, so a successful claim for spousal is unlikely..and I can't see the benefit of asking for full custody when what we have proposed is the next best thing to it. And don't there have to be some kind of grounds when asking for sole custody..in which joint custody would not be beneficial to the child?

She has complained about almost everything in the papers, from the dad asking for copies of report cards, and to be notified first if something should happen that the mother ends up in the hosptial ( she has a chronic illness which she doesn't always manage well) so we may retrieve the son and make sure he doesn't end up in foster care while she's in the hospital.

We are feeling very frustrated and stressed by this whole thing, by all manner of which this should have been easy breezy..just formalizing what they have been doing for years. Any thoughts of what else they might be asking for?

Thanks in advance for the help..I've been somewhat of a basketcase since friday..my mind running wild with speculation...driving me nuts!!
  #2  
Old 11-07-2006, 10:07 PM
logicalvelocity logicalvelocity is offline
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jlalex,

as you mentioned

Quote:
That lawyer is now asking consent to file her clients materials late. What happens if we don't grant consent?
I suspect if you contest it and they have to bring forth a motion to extend the deadline, this action by them suggests that they want to participate in the case and as such, I suspect the court will grant the extension without hesitation. It is almost unnecessary litigation and really has nothing to do with the outstanding issues but rather a procedural. If it was me, I would give them the extension.

Quote:
At this point the only thing I can think of that they would want to dispute is either the spousal support, ask for full custody ( we proposed joint custody with primary residence with her and outlines how major holidays would alternate and the remainder of visitation to be decided by both parties at the beginning of each new year to the best of their abilities taking to account possible scheduling difficulties etc), and splitting his cpp credits for the time they were married - which was an oversite on our part, she is more than welcome to them.
Time will tell what and how they will respond to the issues. If your proposing joint custody but you may contest them for filing their material late, this suggests in a direct way that co-operation is not prevailing.

CPP pension credits cannot be bound to the terms of a court order or separation agreement as CPP is and would be a third party. By default of the CPP directives, the other party is entitled to division of credits, so this is a none issue.

I suspect Custody, access and spousal support may be the outstanding issues. Courts seldom interrupt the status quo living arrangements of a child if everything is working out well for the child.

Quote:
We are feeling very frustrated and stressed by this whole thing, by all manner of which this should have been easy breezy..just formalizing what they have been doing for years. Any thoughts of what else they might be asking for?
It is not uncommon at all to feel that way. Just hang in there and remain focused on the main issues.

Quote:
It seems to me that we have proposed a very reasonable agreement, and am having a very difficult time understanding what there is to disagree with. They have been seperated over 8 yrs now, so a successful claim for spousal is unlikely..and I can't see the benefit of asking for full custody when what we have proposed is the next best thing to it. And don't there have to be some kind of grounds when asking for sole custody..in which joint custody would not be beneficial to the child?
If there is no separation agreement or court order providing otherwise, currently both parent's have coextensive custody of the child/children. Eight years is a long time and as such some what suggests that a joint custody regime may be appropriate in the circumstance. Eight years is significant length of time to suggest historical co-operation in the interest of the child/children.

There is a presumption nowadays that the court will consider a joint custodial regime of the children and the party contesting it must show that it is not in the best interest of the child. ie : no historical communication or co-operation.

Quote:
She has complained about almost everything in the papers, from the dad asking for copies of report cards, and to be notified first if something should happen that the mother ends up in the hosptial ( she has a chronic illness which she doesn't always manage well) so we may retrieve the son and make sure he doesn't end up in foster care while she's in the hospital.
Regardless of what custodial regime is in place for the children Both parent's have the same EQUAL right by default of the law to make inquires to the health, welfare or education of the children. If one parent withholds such information, this conduct does question their ability to parent the children in an ongoing responsibility. If it was me, I wouldn't return the mudsling her way. If this is occurring, the court will want to know why same occurs. Courts have very little patience if one parent is impeding information pertaining to the children's health, welfare and education from the other.

Remain focused on the issued and don't be taken of track by the other parties mudslinging, unfounded allegations etc. Don't fall for this trap. Be cool calm collective at all times and most of all smile at them. They will wonder what on earth your smiling about.

lv
  #3  
Old 11-07-2006, 11:10 PM
jlalex jlalex is offline
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Default thanks lv...

You are absolutely right, we need to remain focused and not get sidetracked. All though it doesn't appear as if things are going to go as smoothly as we had hoped it doesn't necessarily mean its all going to heck either.

As well, thank you for the advice regarding granting consent, I hadn't really looked at it from that perspective, and truly there would be nothing to be gained by not giving it, I guess our backs are up a little bit wondering what she's up to.

Thanks for both the information and the support!

Cheers jlalex
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