what kind of parent does this?

[DeadBeatDouchebagDad]

OP, let me remind you that you're posting on public forum. Aside from reading and commenting about your very public posting, I would take no lengths to know anything else about you.

I am well aware that you have an issue with objective criticism, however, I'll post my opinion when I please and if you don't like it, I suggest you use the ignore function. I wasn't really talking TO you anyway as I understand from previous postings that you are impervious to sense or reason...I was posting ABOUT you and I'll continue to do so at my leisure.

My apologies. I thought you were talking about me with one of your wild guesses.

By now you realize I don't like when people guess. Want to know more? Just ask. If it's specifics I don't want to share in public I'll send you a PM. Arabian was good to me that way.

[FWB]

Take your own advice

LMAO.....

However, OP....once you decide to air your not so clean linen in public, be prepared for a barrage of opinions. Nobody is knocking on anyone's door here like salesmen, trying to sell your advice.

Unfortunately, opinions that are not what a poster wants to hear, is sometimes considered "insult" to some people.

[Pursuinghappiness]

I thought you were talking about me with one of your wild guesses.

I was. However, I don't think I'm the only person who'd come to the "wild guesses" that I did based on what you publicly posted.

Want to know more? Just ask.

I don't but thank you for the offer.

[Berner_Faith]

Yeah there is a way. We don't discuss the Douchebag unless we're alone.

Keep telling yourself that

[DeadBeatDouchebagDad]

Keep telling yourself that

Any more guesses while you're at it?

[DowntroddenDad]

Any more guesses while you're at it?

You think just because you don't say it out loud the kids don't pick up on it? They can pick up on the tone of voice when you say the name of the other parent.

So unless you never ever speak their name or refer to them in any way when the kids are present, which would be impossible to do, then if you harbour the venomous animosity, it will be trasnmitted one way or another.

[DeadBeatDouchebagDad]

So unless you never ever speak their name

BINGO! It's not that hard to wait until we are alone.

[FWB]

Any more guesses while you're at it?

oh dear....I can tell you that this is the wrong tree to be barking up, know which tree to do this to. Hint: Try to see / ask how your related matter has been/ is being handled by the person...you get a better judgement that way

BINGO!

I expect some royalty for the use of that :-)

[DeadBeatDouchebagDad]

Really, this site is great for legal advice but not good for support when I just want to RANT.

Bunch of copy/pasta posts by pple who think they're Dr Phil.

[FB_]

Really, this site is great for legal advice but not good for support when I just want to RANT.

Bunch of copy/pasta posts by pple who think they're Dr Phil.

So you want us to all tell you are correct with your own personal emotional reasoning?

[DeadBeatDouchebagDad]

So you want us to all tell you are correct with your own personal emotional reasoning?

I asked what kind of person prefers spending time with one kid, because this guy does prefer one kid. Even asks if he can drop off the disabled kid sooner on weekends so that he has more time with the typically developed child. Never the other way around! Never asks once in his life to spend one on one with the disabled child.

And what do I get, 5 pages of bullshlt in which people are calling into question why I'm emotionally involved, why dont I see it from the kids perspective.

I have thick skin but come on.

[stripes]

Really, this site is great for legal advice but not good for support when I just want to RANT.

Bunch of copy/pasta posts by pple who think they're Dr Phil.

It's a good place to rant if you know you're not being entirely rational and you want people to talk you down from your perch. I've done it a couple of times - posted something like a rant on here (with a subject like "Please remind me why I don't need to respond to this", when the ex had done something especially infuriating), in the hope and expectation that people would tell me I was thinking way too emotionally, and get me back into a state of reason. As Berner_Faith says, sometimes we need to be told to pull our heads out of ... somewhere.

"Support" doesn't mean unconditionally agreeing with what you say. Sometimes it means pointing out the implications of what you're saying say with the intention to trying to guide you to a better place. You can accept that support or not, as you choose.

[FB_]

I asked what kind of person prefers spending time with one kid, because this guy does prefer one kid. Even asks if he can drop off the disabled kid sooner on weekends so that he has more time with the typically developed child. Never the other way around! Never asks once in his life to spend one on one with the disabled child.

And what do I get, 5 pages of bullshlt of people calling into question why I'm emotionally involved, why dont I see it from the kids perspective. I have thick skin but come on.

I know nothing of the situation when these parents were together but I do know there are parents out there who can be control freaks.

I've seen it myself in almost the exact situation. Parents have a disabled child. Mother or Father becomes over protective of this child and pretty much excludes other parent from being a part of the kids upbringing. Parents get separated the parent who was excluded now has not developed the skills relevant to handle the needs of a special needs child.

Again I'm not saying that his is the case here. Maybe if the father was offered some support such as a respite worker while he has his access it would create some improvements.

I highly doubt it's a he loves one kid more but most likely he has no clue what he's doing with the disabled child. Now if it were me I'd do what was required to spend time with my child even if there was a disability.


Anyway back to your point about a whole thread of bullshit. Obviously you view it as that as we didn't all agree the he's a "DeadBeatDouchebagDad"

Maybe he is...but expecting everyone in a public forum to agree with you with only 1 side of a 4 sided story is a bit naive IMO.

[FWB]

Really, this site is great for legal advice but not good for support when I just want to RANT.

I think you are getting some of us mixed up with others..you've seen me rant, I also like listening to a rant because am able to just blank it out

but expecting everyone in a public forum to agree with you with only 1 side of a 4 sided story is a bit naive IMO.

To be fair to the OP....well they are not the only one guilty of this, they have company.

I've done it a couple of times - posted something like a rant on here (with a subject like "Please remind me why I don't need to respond to this", when the ex had done something especially infuriating),

But did you take offense to the negative feedback?

[DeadBeatDouchebagDad]

All this writing I'm doing is virtual therapy for me. I can only talk about this with my partner and she had a minibreakdown yesterday over all the stress of raising an autistic child (A7). So it's like, man, I need a release even if it means blogging this shit out.

(A7) with autism is a handful. Not impossible to manage but that child will drain your battery dry after an hour or two. My partner and I are like a tag team wrestling team that taps in, taps out when one of us can't go any more. We have all kinds of gov't services, doctors, psychologists, genetic specialists, respite homes, behavioural therapists, babysitters, coming to help us with the child. Lately though, (A7)'s behaviour has earned the child "persona non grata" status from respite homes that are supposed to specialize in behavioural problems. So my partner is seeing doors that use to be open for her child close one by one and it's taking its toll. What does she do when all doors are closed?

She talked about 'giving up' yesterday. That was shocking to hear because I'm not ready to give up anytime soon. I think she was just having a moment when she said this and other things like giving the child back to the father to take care of. I love the kid so I would never go that route because my best bet would be that if (A7) went to the Ex, he'd be put in an institution forever. When Ex lived in the house, he suggested putting locks on the doors so (A7) would not leave the bedroom. So wrong.

If I didn't have to work I'd stay home and homeschool this kid. The child listens to me and doesn't show behavioural aggression that shows to my partner. I play a lot with this kid, baseball, golf, soccer etc... kid is lightyears more coordinated than when I first played with couple years ago. I try to get him to read because he is basically illiterate and can't count at age 7. Maybe he can read and count, but with autism it is near impossible communicating from his world to mine.

Maybe he is...but expecting everyone in a public forum to agree with you with only 1 side of a 4 sided story is a bit naive IMO.

Yes it was a little naive of me. Good post FB_.

But did you take offense to the negative feedback?

Maybe just a teeny tiny bit