Would you?

[onlybeginning]

Would you continue in mediation if your EX moved to a new home (same town) unaffecting access schedule and refused to provide you with the new address so you know who and where your children are living when they are not with you?

EX does not believe you are entitled to know where the children are living when they are not living with you if it unaffects access. There is NO history of violence between you and your EX.

How would you proceed after numerous polite requests for this information and were denied?

[firhill]

How would you proceed after numerous polite requests for this information and were denied?

Did she respond to, or completely ignore, the e-mail request you sent?

[onlybeginning]

Did she respond to, or completely ignore, the e-mail request you sent?

Emails have been ignored, inperson requests are met with an answer of "the children are at the other end of the phone thats all you need". Have made 2 requests via email, 1 in communication book and twice in person.

[firhill]

Document it. Maybe with the aid of a voice recorder in person.

As HD said previously, add it to the list that of stuff that shows she's being unreasonable.

As for mediation. I'd continue, state your feelings on the issue to the mediator and see what he/she suggests.

[SadAndTired]

I would refuse to let the children go.

Flame me if you must but if ex takes the children "to his new residence" and something happens to him, I don't know where our children are.

Many, many cases exist on canlii that require the parents to provide new contact information (ie cell numbers) within a certain time of the changes occuring. I researched it before I did my parenting plan.

Here is just one.

CanLII - 2010 SKQB 178 (CanLII)

saying

5) When the petitioner is parenting A.T.S., the respondent shall be advised where he will be parenting the child and be provided with appropriate contact information;

Would he like it if you moved and didn't tell him where? Even the court documents must list a home address and the location where a parent will be having access if there is only visitation.

I don't know what you should do about mediation but I certainly wouldn't let the kids go without a proper address for where they are spending the night. Even during short vacations, judges order that the itinerary and contact information must be provided.

[SynGreis]

the problem is the court document address isnt always the home.

[wretchedotis]

You should proceed as normal.

That is a matter of privacy, and the other side is within their rights.

I don't imagine it looks very good to a Judge when Trial comes and you are taking the effort to prove just where the conflict is coming from.

1 Step back can sometimes lead to two steps forward.

IMHO - you are better off to take it in stride, and play that card when the time comes by submitting evidence of reasonable requests met with unreasonable actions/answers.

[SadAndTired]

No Syn, I just meant that if her ex says he doesn't have to tell where he lives and that a phone number is enough, the proof is that a court requires him to disclose his info. You can't simply not say where you are taking the kids. (Well, I mean, you can but it isn't right.)

When it comes to coparenting, it isn't a matter of privacy at all.

[wretchedotis]

No Syn, I just meant that if her ex says he doesn't have to tell where he lives and that a phone number is enough, the proof is that a court requires him to disclose his info. You can't simply not say where you are taking the kids. (Well, I mean, you can but it isn't right.)

When it comes to coparenting, it isn't a matter of privacy at all.

It's not right, but it's not worth playing gatekeeper and withholding access over, either. That action would be seen as the more serious of the two.
At least by a judge, in Family Court.

This is my experience. Like it or lump it.

[Berner_Faith]

Agree with wretchedotis- while it is not right that the other parent is withholding that information, if you have a contact number that should be okay for the time being (did you 411 the number!? or is it just a cell phone)

Refusing to attend mediation is only going to stall your process, however that is something you cab bring up that you would like to know where the children reside when in the other parents care in the event something happens and you have to get to the children. Continue on is the sessions...eventually the address will come out

[hadenough]

If you opt out of mediation it shows conflict. If you continue, it demonstrates that in spite of the DOCUMENTED challenges you've faced, that you are willing to come to the proverbial table and be reasonable. Not only that - what better opportunity to showcase the fact that this information has been withheld from you and you have made several attempts to inquire?

And for the record, I would be super pissed not knowing where my child/ren was/were. My ex has lived in a few houses since we split. I have never been to a single one of them - not even in the "area" let alone AT the house, but I've always known the exact street address.

[wretchedotis]

In conference I was told by a judge that the ex was okay to withhold that information.

However, I was also facing what turned out to be withdrawn charges/accusations of domestic violence when he said that.

So take from that what you will.

[SingleDad12]

My ex refused to tell me her new address as well when she first moved out. I know it was in the same town, but she refused. Thing is...she agreed that she would pick up our daughter from me and I would get her at the end of the visit. In order to do that, I needed her address!!!

Anyhow, I'd still keep going with mediation...perhaps make it part of the proceedings. As far as legal action, it would be cheaper to hire a private investigator...follow her home and report back to you if it's that important to you.

Good luck!