Let me introduce my self...stressed, depressed, and out of ideas

[Daffodil]

Totally abusive! Where did you come to that conclusion? A b-day party fight over 4 years, she doesn't suggest controlling over the 4 years? She seems to have more worry about ss cs and her home...holy jump to conclusions batman! I am not sure if I would come to that conclusion, there are not enough details for that assumption. If she is being abused and in danger then she has reported that. Then it has to be proven. There are always two sides and emotion run high. I am sure her ex would have a different take. What mess has said is right and cautious.

06 nomad - I'm not here to tell you my life story, but I will say that the incident over my cousin's bday - was not just a "fight". There were many examples of controlling behaviour over the years......I just went along with things to keep the peace. Do I have bruises and scars? no. Am I afraid of him when he becomes angry - hell yes.

[Daffodil]

[quote=dadtotheend;64134]If you correctly calculated net family property, the $100K loan would already be included in the $300K. Methinks you might have some learning to do on equalization.


No - I don't. $100k loan is PRE marriage. Not tied to the mortgage in any way. So
considered to be a"pre maritial debt" and not deducted from my assets the same way the mortgage would be.

[Mess]

I realize you are keeping the numbers a bit simplified but I think we are all confused..

You took out a $100k loan for renovations on the house. You then got married. Your current asset is almost nil except for the value of the house.

The question is, what is the current value of the house? It isn't clear from your post.

If the value of the house is $400k, on the surface you would split that amount, he gets $200k and you get $200k but keep the loan debt leaving you with $100k.

That would only be fair if you had spent the loan money on personal items before marriage. The issue is you used the loan for house reno. You should therefore argue that the loan went directly into the home, you should gather all receipts and bank records which would point to that, you should then assert that the loan amount should come off the top. This leaves the home worth $300k and you each walk away with $150k effectively splitting the loan.

Because it was a short marriage and the loan and house purchase were made just before marriage when you were living common law I think you have a very strong argument. Lay it out in a reasonable argument and suggest a settlement out of court because fighting would be a waste.