Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

New to this madness ...

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • #31
    Just wanted to say that I have been getting my finances in order and doing a lot of purging in the house. I’ve asked him to take all his stuff which I have moved most of into the basement. Don’t want anything of him around me. He is dragging his feet getting this done.

    Over all he has been rather “nice”. I recently had a birthday (my 64th) and he sent me a pm on fb to wish me a happy birthday complete with cute animated characters. Just very strange.

    But the thing that really bothers me is that his b***h fancies herself to be a writer and posts essays online publicly. Some of her stuff is blatantly about my husband and I without actually naming us. Today she posted something about love. First she goes on about love for your children but then she talks about marital love and finishes off by declaring how wonderful her messed hot steamy bed is. I think she is messing with me. She is poison. Had to get this off my chest.

    Comment


    • #32
      Don't do facebook. My ex's g/f was pretty awful years ago. Social media will simply suck you into their drama and make you feel terrible.

      With regard to his belongings. Call a moving company and have it removed from your home. If he doesn't want it delivered then moving company can put it into storage. Well worth the cost of moving & storage. In future, look to dealing with things like this in such a way that you don't have to deal with him. Of course the g/f is trying to make you feel awful. You aren't imaging things. Eradicate yourself from this childish nonsense. Continue to take control of your life and make decisive decisions. I think purging is very therapeutic.

      The birthday message to you on FB was likely penned by his g/f. Sicko people like this will be nice to you (to keep contact) and then stab you in the back. Recognize it for what it is and prevent it from happening again.
      Last edited by arabian; 12-15-2018, 09:31 PM.

      Comment


      • #33
        Originally posted by Sad54 View Post
        Today she posted something about love. First she goes on about love for your children but then she talks about marital love and finishes off by declaring how wonderful her messed hot steamy bed is. I think she is messing with me. She is poison. Had to get this off my chest.
        Why are you friends with her on facebook? Nobody is forcing you to read her posts. This is you causing your own problems.

        Comment


        • #34
          Originally posted by Janus View Post
          Why are you friends with her on facebook? Nobody is forcing you to read her posts. This is you causing your own problems.
          But Janus why are you creeping your ex's Instagram? =P

          Comment


          • #35
            Originally posted by tunnelight View Post
            But Janus why are you creeping your ex's Instagram? =P
            To the best of my knowledge my ex has never had an Instagram account, one of her few redeeming qualities...

            Comment


            • #36
              I am not friends with her on fb. She posts essays on a public site called Medium. I check to see what she writes as I can get a feel for what is going on with my husband. He is not my ex yet and there is always the possibility that his relationship with her will blow up in his face. She is an admitted narcissist. This explains an awful lot about how things transpired. I also want to know how she portrays me to the public. I think I have a right to know. If at the end of all this there is a divorce then I will wash my hands of them.

              Comment


              • #37
                Its like a double edge sword. Its probably best you dont look because it most likely upsets you. But human curiosity, ya I think I would lurk on there too. Is easy for people to tell you to move on, but sometimes that takes some time.

                Comment


                • #38
                  Why would you care what is happening with him? He chose to leave you for this woman and both of them are hurting you. Stop worrying about him and focus on yourself.

                  Comment


                  • #39
                    Rockscan there is some truth in what you say, but I told him to move out to see if this is what he truly wants. Gave him a year. So, it’s not over until it’s over. I’ve spent 37 years with this man. It would be easier to move on if I was in my 30s or 40s. Not so much when you’re 64.

                    Comment


                    • #40
                      The fact that he chose her over you would be enough for me. Age or not. There are plenty of things for people over 60 and you don’t necessarily have to find a new husband to enjoy them. You should really be looking at this time to improve yourself. See a therapist. Enroll in free seniors activities in your town. Connect with friends. More than likely you are suffering from depression brought on by this situation. You would find talking to someone very helpful and may empower you to see just how toxic this man has been!

                      I was never more proud of my mom when she told my father right to his face that she would never consider taking him back after all of the damage he had done to her. She had been a stay at home mom and was trying to get back on her feet by going back to school and getting stronger. You are never too old for a fresh start or to cut ties to people who drag you down.

                      Don’t waste this year waiting.

                      Comment


                      • #41
                        It is over. Hire a lawyer. Seek spousal support and the equalization of assets. Treat it as a death. Most men die well in advance of their spouse. Just look at it like you are a widow. At your age any children you have are adults and you will always have them in your life. A partner is not a necessity to enjoy life.

                        Comment


                        • #42
                          look at it like you "dodged a bullet" - I do.

                          you could have been stuck being his nursemaid for eternity. eeek!

                          Comment


                          • #43
                            Thank you everyone for your comments and encouragement. It really does help. I guess in my heart I do know that it is over. Yes, my kids are adults and they are very supportive. It’s too bad that they now have no relationship with him. They have a lot of disappointment, pain and lack of respect for him. Not sure if any of us can recover from that. But, we will move on.

                            My husband recently was in Ireland and while there, he researched some of his family history. My kids find it ironic that he is more interested in his dead relatives than his living ones. Ha, ha.

                            Comment


                            • #44
                              Or maybe he really wants to know from which Irish duchebag he got his assholeness from
                              Last edited by tunnelight; 01-14-2019, 02:06 AM.

                              Comment

                              Our Divorce Forums
                              Forums dedicated to helping people all across Canada get through the separation and divorce process, with discussions about legal issues, parenting issues, financial issues and more.
                              Working...
                              X